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Posts Tagged ‘comic’

 
 

Keep Him Intrigued!

Sunday, July 19th, 2009

Last night we saw Coldplay at the Home Depot Center in Carson. Never again will I see anything at the Home Depot Center in Carson.

There is not a good seat in the house, and it’s the most poorly run place I’ve ever seen. It took an hour to get the car out of the parking lot. An hour! I pulled out of the parking space and could see the exit, but we just couldn’t get to it. They just had no clue how to move traffic.

The show itself was great! There was the Internet rumor that they were doing a fifteen minute cover of Michael Jackson’s “Billy Jean” at all of their shows. You’ve got to love the Internet. The song “Billy Jean” is three minutes long . . . and so was the cover version that Coldplay did last night.

I love how rumors start. So let’s start our own rumor today. I don’t know what I want to start, but there’s got to be something we can start. Give me some time, I’ll come up with something during the day (and maybe I’ll post it in the comments).

Otherwise, let’s get into today’s truth . . .

In a recent blog, I discussed how women can know if a man is attracted to them on a date. Now let’s talk about how a woman can keep that attraction going.

Men love to be teased. If a man touches your arm during the course of a date, touch him a few times back. That will drive him crazy. When you go to the bathroom, get up and on the way to the bathroom touch his shoulder and whisper “I’ll be right back” in his ear. That will really drive him crazy!

When he’s talking and leaning into you, lean into him so he can feel your closeness. When he goes to kiss you on the cheek, give him a quick kiss on the lips, a quick smile, and then walk away. As you’re walking away, turn around and give him another smile.

Also, compliment a man during a date. Tell him you’re having a good time. Laugh at his silly jokes. This will keep him intrigued.

These are some simple techniques that you can use to flirt and let a man know that you’re interested

George Carlin On Aging

Sunday, March 15th, 2009

Today I thought I would share something that my girlfriend and I really enjoyed yesterday. George Carlin was an amazing person who had some very unique views on life.

As you know I never post anything up here from others……but this message rings really true.

Enjoy your Sunday and back to the crazy world of sex, dating and relationships tomorrow.

Enjoy the ride; There is no return ticket

George Carlin on aging!

George Carlin’s Views on Aging

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old
is when we’re kids? If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so
excited about aging that you think in fractions.
‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m four and a half!’ You’re never thirty-six and a half. You’re four and a half, going on five! That’s the key.

You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the
next number, or even a few ahead.
‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m gonna be 16!’ You could be 13, but hey, you’re
gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life !

You become 21.
Even the words sound like a ceremony. YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound
like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There’s no fun now,
you’re Just a sour-dumpling. What’s wrong? What’s changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you’re PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the
brakes, it’s all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and
your dreams are gone.

But! wait!! ! You MAKE it to 60. You didn’t think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and make it to 60.

You’ve built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it’s a
day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into ! your 80’s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT
lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn’t end there.
Into the 90s, you start going backwards; ‘I Was JUST 92.’

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a
little kid again. ‘I’m 100 and a half!’
May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!

HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and
height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay ‘them.’

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3.Keep learning. ! Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening,
whatever, even ham radio. Never let the brain idle. ‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’ And the devil’s family name is Alzheimer’s.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who
is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it’s family, pets,
keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable,
improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don’t take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next
county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them , at every opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER :
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the
moments that take our breath away.

And if you don’t send this to at least 8 people – who cares?But do
share this with someone. We all need to live life to its fullest each
day!!

Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safelyin a well preserved body,
but rather to skid in sideways,totally worn out, shouting ‘…holy sh*t …what a ride!’