On the internet, the majority of people are ‘athletic and toned,’ yet we live in a country where most people don’t work out.

It seems like the internet is always bucking all trends. There’s a ton of women on the internet that are 39 years old but yet there are no women that are 40 or 41. It seems like everyone wants to remain 39, 29, 49 – no one wants to cross over to the 4-0, 3-0, or 5-0!

Internet dating is really interesting because to succeed there, you should really put up an array of photos of yourself. The fact is that you look exactly the way you do. There’s no denying that. You can’t just check a box that says ‘athletic and toned’ when you’re not, because eventually you’ll have to show up on the date and the other person is going to see that you’ve never worked out.

You’re not going to be able to convince them – you won’t become a date salesman who sits there and convinces someone to like the body type they don’t like, or to become attracted to you when they aren’t.

So the best thing to do is to put up five pictures of yourself: three body shots (I’m not talking naked ones, or bikini shots, or muscle shots for guys) but three shots where you are standing head to toe. Three current shots that show exactly what you look like today, so there are no surprises.

The reason that most dates don’t work out is because the person was afraid to put up a picture because they didn’t like the way their body looked. They then go on the date, the other person isn’t attracted to them, and they don’t call them back. You can eliminate that step – why go out on so many first dates when you are misrepresenting yourself?

The fact is that you should be proud of who you are. Your body is your body. It’s exactly what it’s going to be, and you shouldn’t compare it to anybody else. You need to embrace it. So put yourself up there on the net, be who you are, and don’t try to sell yourself like a used car!

It’s funny, when I look for used cars, I’m always weary of the car that only has one picture up of it. Doesn’t she want to seduce me? Doesn’t she want me to take her for a test drive? Shouldn’t I see the wheels and the shiny inside? Shouldn’t I see the leather interior? I hate looking at a used car that the owner says is in absolutely perfect condition, and there are rips on the leather seats. You don’t want to be the car that has the rips on the leather seats.

You want to show everyone who you are. Get a friend, take a few pictures, smile, and be proud of who you are.

You know what? In the long run, you’re going to attract a lot more people doing it this way, and you won’t have to worry about what body type box you need to check off. If they see you, they’ll know what type of body you have!

Saturday in the park……can any one tell me that song….or I am just pushing you in the right direction today?

I want to share a story with you about a client I had whose name is Charles. Charles was someone who was extremely quiet when we first met – he actually was so quiet that you couldn’t hear him speak in a restaurant. He also didn’t dress well. He was a good-looking guy, but he didn’t have any confidence.

So we went out and did a complete makeover, from head to toe. We gave him an incredible new look that really fit him well. It’s funny, because he showed up one night to go out in his brand new look, and we played the game that I love playing. It’s one of my favorite games that I love to play with a waitress.

It’s called the Guess What We All Do for a Living game. The waitress is hanging out and working, and she gets a lot of different people hitting on her in different ways, and she’s able to read people. So we were talking to her a bit, and then I asked her, “guess what we all do for a living?”

She looked at Charles, and she said, “hm. He looks like he’s a fashion photographer from London.” And Charles’ mouth just went from side to side – here’s a guy who didn’t have any confidence, and all of a sudden, this woman thought he was a fashion photographer from London. It made him feel really good.

So the look was completed, but what he did after the fact was also really important. After the coach session, he did a couple of things – you want to go out there not only to stores and be friendly with people, and restaurants, but you want to have activities. You want to create dates with yourself. You want to create a social calendar with yourself.

Some of the great things to do with yourself are to volunteer at a dog rescue place that gives out dogs on a Saturday or Sunday in the park or wherever. By volunteering at a dog rescue place, you’re forced to meet people, talk to them, and get to know them.

Another idea is to become a tour guide of the city. Going and showing tour groups around different neighborhoods in your city will help you to learn people. The more you learn people, the better you’ll be at understanding people and flirting.

One of the best things to do is to take an Improv class. An Improv class will teach you how to be quick, how to be observant – if you think about Improv, you have you get up in front of the entire class, and the teacher says, “red,” and you say, “blue” – and you have to concentrate really hard on what the other person is saying. Improv class will also teach you how to be playful and more fun.

Those are some really good suggestions, but I think everybody who is single should have a social calendar. Get the free weekly newspaper on a Thursday and find things to do. There are art gallery openings, and many other things that you can do and put on your social calendar.

Start booking dates with yourself. All of a sudden, you’ll start finding other people who do the same thing. Then you can begin to expand your social network.

Todays video goes over how to start doing all of this and lose the negative monkey chatter in your brain!!

Have a great Saturday!

So now it is summer time. It is a good time to update your wardrobe. Plus all the sales are now are taking place and most of the clothes are 50% off!!

What is really fun about updating your wardrobe is not buying the stuff and then taking it home; it’s the actual act of buying it – the art of buying. This gives you the opportunity to walk into any clothing store you want, find a woman you are attracted to, look at her, walk directly over to her and say, “hey, I’m looking to update my look, and I’d like to get your opinion on it. I’m curious: what would you like to see on my if I came and picked you up at your house tonight?”

Be playful a little bit. Let her dress you. Have some fun with it. Do something different – push yourself out of your comfort zone! If that’s too bold of a statement for you to make when you walk in there, then walk up to her and say, “listen, I’ve been to a couple of stores and I’m looking to update my wardrobe, what do you think would look good on me?”

That’s it. “I was wondering…” or “I was curious…” – these are two very powerful phrases because they allow you to get them to talk about their emotions. Curiosity and wonder are emotion-based, and you use these words to engage her in a conversation.

What you do is walk into that store and engage her in a conversation. You allow her to dress you, you have some playful banter – you can find out whether or not she likes you through the playful banter.

But the bottom line is, it’s springtime, and you probably do need some new clothes. You need to get out there and do it. Head to the mall, head to a store where you see a woman you are attracted to, and walk directly in there.

Let’s say there’s a woman shopping in the store – it doesn’t matter who she is shopping for – her boyfriend, her brother, whoever. Ask her! Try something on, and walk over to her and say, “hey, let me ask you a quick question: I’m curious, what do you think of this shirt on me? What do you think of these jeans on me?” Get her opinion on the whole thing. You never know – she may not have a boyfriend. She may actually be shopping for her father or her brother. She may be shopping for you! Who knows?

If you talk to her and have a good time talking with her, what happens is that you’ve made a new contact, and that new contact could be somebody that you could meet again at a later date – and perhaps at that later date, they have a really good-looking friend with them. Then you’ll have an opportunity to go and meet her friend through her.

It’s all about connecting, and all about having fun. So think of shopping in a whole different way, and go out and enjoy yourself.

If you’re on a budget and don’t have much money for clothes – don’t worry about it. You can go window shop and try some clothes on, figure out what you’re going to buy at a later date, and still have fun meeting people.

Talk to you soon!
Todays Video is all about how to be dynamic even if you don’t have the new clothes!!!