Hey everybody,

Happy National Wear Your Pajamas to Work Day!

It’s also Wednesday, which means it’s time for the Wednesday Podcast.

Last week we talked about The Negotiator vs. Intuition, and many readers had some issues with the idea of trusting your feelings over your thoughts.

This week, we go a bit more into that and also discuss the topics of spontaneity and transition.

Listen up, listen well, my friends:

What do you think?

As usual the year is moving along at a rapid pace.

One month from today is my birthday, so this will be your only reminder to make sure that you spoil me on my birthday!

I have a question for all of you today.

How fun are you?

Are you able to get out of your head and just let go, without thinking of how others perceive you?

I show you how on today’s podcast, listen now below!

Click Here To Download Today’s Podcast!

As well as a podcast today, I want to share this video with you.

When I was in London last month we did a get out of your head exercise during the bootcamp.

Check out how we go out of our heads and became the life of the party in London.

And for those of you who are thinking of a bootcamp.

I only have 3 left this year, so check out the schedule below and if your interested shoot me an email so we can go over all the details.

Bootcamp Schedule

June 10th – 12th
The Only 2011 New York City Bootcamp for Men
1 slots left!

July 15th – 17th
Toronto Bootcamp for Men with myself and Marni from Wing Girls.
5 slots left!

October 28th – 30th
London Bootcamp for Men
5 slots left!

Well, if he’s into the woman he’s with, what he’s really thinking is, “When can we do this again? Man, that was great! I’d love to do this again, it’ll be even better next time!” They’re actually looking forward to it.
I know when I have great sex, I’ll lay next to my woman and I’ll think to myself, “Man, I really want to do this again.” Or, “I wish I had lasted just a little bit longer because it felt so good and I wanted to keep going.”

When I was younger, I used to always think about whether or not she had an orgasm: “Hmm, I think she did, but I’m not quite sure… I can ask her. But wait, if I ask her, I’m going to sound really wimpy like I don’t know what I’m doing… argh.” A lot of men will think, “Did she come? Did she enjoy it? Was I good enough for her? Was I better than her previous lovers? Did she have as much fun as I did?”
Sex really is a blast. In years and years of having sex, I’ve learned one thing: Communication is the key. It’s okay to ask her, “How was that for you?” But not like an interrogation, like a scientist taking notes. The best way to ask her is to say, “Babe, I really enjoyed that. How was it for you? Is there anything you want to do differently next time? I really wanted to last longer because it felt so good.”

Londons Great Spring Weather

Men’s minds travel in many different directions after sex. Granted, there’s the one-night stand where the man wants to do the Coyote Ugly, where he wants chew off his arm so he can leave without waking her up, where he basically just wished she’d turn into a remote control, where he hopes and prays that she doesn’t want to spend the night. Sure, there are those moments. And in those moments, and if both of you understand that you’re having a one-night-stand, the best thing to do is look at each other after sex and just say, “All right, let’s be honest. There was a lot of passion, a lot of heat, but we don’t really know each other. Is this a one-night-stand we’re having?”

You can laugh. Talk about it. Most of all, be honest, be receptive, and tell each other where you’re at right now. Don’t promise the phone number when you know you’re never going to call her. Be a man about it.
Women: as men, our minds go so many different directions when it comes down to sex. The bottom line is that if we’re into you, we want to know if you enjoyed it as much as we did. We want to know if there’s anything else we can do to make the next experience with you even hotter and more erotic.

So I was boarding the flight and it’s funny, I’ve been a relationship coach for so long now that I pick up on first encounters everywhere I go. As I was getting seated, in the row in front of me I spotted a guy sitting next to a young woman and he was clearly trying to get a conversation going.

Problem was, he couldn’t get a sentence out without going “uhh” and “umm” every other word.

“That’s cool…ummm… Yea, that’s nice… uhh… So, um, where are you from?” Now I’m not making fun of this guy at all, he was just nervous and the woman he was talking to was trying really hard to listen to what he was saying.
Are you an “umm-er” or an “uhh-er”? There’s some new terminology. So this inspired me to do a “umm-uhh” blog today.

Here’s the deal: You know the people who, when they don’t know what to say next in conversation, they always go, “uh” or “um”? The only place where “uh’s” and “um’s” are great is when you’re in the heat of passion, you’re having great sex, and it feels really good and you let out an occasional “ah”, or an occasional “um”, or an occasional “hmm”.

But when you’re “ah-ing” and “um-ing” in the middle of a conversation, it means you’re not really listening to the conversation flow. It means that you’re stuck in your head thinking about what to say next and thinking about if what you’re saying right now is the right thing to say.

I’ve seen this with a lot of guys that I’ve coached. I’ve watched them go over and talk to women, and I know they stop listening in the middle of the conversation because what happens is the woman will say something interesting, the guy will not know what to say because he gets lost inside his head. He stops being present and he comes back with an “uh” or an “um”.

I know that when someone “uh’s” or “umm’s” me, it means that they’re really not paying attention. It means that they’re focusing on something else. Maybe they’re watching the television. Maybe somebody else caught their eye.

But in real conversations that are engaging and interesting, “uhh’s” and “umm’s” just don’t come up in the first 30 seconds of talking unless you’re not paying attention and you’re not present in the conversation. So if you’re an or an “umm-er”, realize why you’re doing it. And realize that you need to start paying deeper attention to what other people are saying so that you can be engaging and really carry the conversation forward.

And do you know what always happens the first night of bootcamp?

Right away I have to deprogram a few of the guys.

So how do i deprogram them?

I basically take their crutches away and get them to walk on there own without the use of pick up lines!

You all know how I feel about pickup lines so last night I was all about deprogramming some guys minds.

So how can I help you and your mind today?

Glad you asked.

Today’s video has all the answers!

My weekend will be hanging with some great guys doing a bootcamp.

For those of you who are thinking of taking a bootcamp this summer, we only have 2 left this summer.

Check the schedule on the home page and lets get you to a bootcamp this summer!!!

Today I am going to share some great tips on how to date after a divorce.

Enjoy and have an amazing Friday!

What is up with people who write nasty comments about other people? Really, what is up with people like that?

Why would you have any desire to trash someone who is trying to improve themselves? I don’t care what you say about me, because I know who I am. Not only that, but people who write negative comments about someone is usually very jealous of that person.

So when it comes to someone who writes comments that spew negativity, it usually means that they are a very jealous person. They can’t do what you do, so they trash you instead of just congratulating you on your accomplishments.

They will say things like, “That guy is lame” or “That guy is a pussy” or “What a faggot!” Negative comments are often so juvenile. If you read a lot of the comments on YouTube, you would think a 12 year old is writing them. Actually I think I am giving too much maturity to these — it’s like a 5 year old is writing them.

You have no right to criticize people who are trying to improve themselves — whether they are just out approaching people or they come to a Bootcamp or in whatever way they are trying to make improvements. This is especially true for people who are willing to put themselves on video so that you can learn from their experiences.

Negativity is a disease that too many people have due to their own inadequacies. The reason why they’re negative is that they are so afraid to go out and try the things they’re being negative about on their own.

They’re so afraid to improve themselves, and would rather be an “armchair quarterback” who acts like they can do better. What is funny, though, is that they are the ones watching these videos.

I’m not negative about anybody. I truly believe that everybody’s path is their own, and and I embrace on whatever path people people choose to be.

If you’re not good at something, I am not going to make fun of you. I’m not five years old.

You can almost hear these people in their five year old whining voice saying to their computer screen, “You can’t do it, you can’t do it, na na na na na na…” I mean, come on folks.

We’re all out there trying to do better in life. Instead of being negative, support somebody and say “Hey man, that must have been tough doing that. I can’t do it and I’m gonna man up and tell you that I can’t do it.”

Start doing that, and maybe then people will come and reach out to you. If you’re negative, you’re not better than anybody else. Negative people are never better than anyone else, because anyone who is truly secure and confident and capable of doing what they are criticizing would never be so negative about someone learning how to be that same way.

I recently had someone who came in from Australia to work with me, and of course the conversation was all about how to meet women at the beach (since it’s the middle of summer there). Then there are other guys who will be traveling to Mexico, Florida or the Caribbean for vacation or spring break. All of these guys will be wondering how to meet people on the beach.

The beach is a blast. To me, it has all the best props you could possibly have.

One of the things we used to do in the Bootcamps is to go to the beach and build sand castles. I’d put the guys right near the water just like when you were a kid, and had them build sand castles.

Then when a woman would come over in our direction, I would turn to her and say “You know, we could use a woman’s finishing touch. We need a little help on the interior right now. I just don’t really know where to put the furniture.” We would just have fun and get the women to laugh.

Then I might say, “Come in here. Let me show you the master suite.” This is so they will actually bend down and look at the sand castle.

Most women will then say something like this: “Oh my God, that’s a beautiful master suite. I would put put this shell in the middle here, and put that pebble over there…I would also want to go with a different color palette – too much gray.” There are so many ways to have fun with this.

Another thing you can do to meet people at the beach is to say to someone standing near the water’s edge, “I’ll race you in.” Many women will respond and say something like, “No, it’s too cold.”

At that point, you want to challenge her. Say something like, “Are you a chicken? You’re afraid to go in the water? You are standing here in the hot sun, but you won’t go in the water? Come on, let’s go.” You make it a game. You have fun.

Another thing I always used to do to meet people at the beach is to bring a Frisbee and a ball. When a woman would walk towards me, I’d throw the ball in the air, look at them and say “Catch!”

She’ll catch the ball and then throw it back to you. Then you can say, “Why do you throw like a girl? Didn’t your father ever teach you not to throw like a girl? Come on, you can throw better than that!” Once again, challenge her and have fun.

That’s what it is all about when you’re at the beach. People go to the beach to have a good time, to relax and to swim.

So these are all great ways you can engage people in conversation and activities at the beach. If they’re having fun with you, the conversation immediately becomes a lot easier.

This is something we often go through at the Bootcamps. A lot of guys will say to me, “David, how do you remain so razor sharp? How do you focus? I can’t focus when I go and talk to a woman. My mind is all over the place.”

Guys will also say to me, “You always tell us to go out there and talk to people all day long, but I lose focus. I can only do it for ten minutes before I lose focus.” Here are some of my best tips to address these questions.

If you can only do it for ten minutes, then do the best job you possibly can doing it for those ten minutes. Always give people your best when you’re with them.

Let’s say that your goals are to meet women and to become a better communicator. Then what you should do is focus on one thing at a time each day. Get good at one thing at a time.

Let’s say your goal is to work on your social skills, and you wonder how to keep your energy up all day long. Here is another thing I tell guys all the time.

When I am driving in the car, I relax, listen to some music and have a good time. So then when I go to the market or the coffee house or a party, I’m ready. I’m amped up because I realize that life is a gift.

You never have a second chance to make a first impression, so why not get your energy up when you’re in public? When you’re in private, you can relax — take a cat nap or do some deep-breathing exercises. That way, when you are around people you can be razor sharp and your energy will be fantastic.

As some of you know, this was going to be my last year personally coaching Bootcamps. I have an amazing team of coaches who would have carried on for me brilliantly, and they will continue to do an amazing job coaching for me.

As for my decision to stop coaching Bootcamps myself at the end of this year, though, and as the NFL field judges say, upon further review I have changed my mind. No, not about how fantastic my coaches are, but about coaching the Bootcamps myself after the end of 2009.

It’s what I love to do. Not only that, I personally believe my Bootcamps are superior to all the garbage ones that are out there being taught by pretend wannabe experts.

So no retirement from coaching Bootcamps for me. The Bootcamps will move forward with me (and my team of coaches) coaching them in 2010, 2011, 2012 and beyond. It’s going to take a serious ACL injury to get me out of the Bootcamp coaching game.

For those of you who thought I was walking away from everything, I have just one question for you. Are you crazy? I’m not going anywhere (except maybe on a few trips next year).

There are, however, some great new things I’ll be coming out with next year and in the near future. We’re already kicking off some great new ideas.

Adam (my head instructor in London) and I have come up with an amazing seminar that will be taking place in London in a few weeks which is FREE. Click here to check it out.

For the women, we’re doing a killer seminar in Los Angeles this Sunday (November 8th). Click here to learn more about it.

For anyone who don’t know my team, I’ve hand-selected and personally trained every person who works with me. Not only have I personally trained them, but they all stand alone as amazing coaches. Your experience with any one of them would be just as satisfying as your experience would be with me.

My team and I plan on doing a lot of new programs next year. One of them is going to be an incredible inner mindset seminar. Details, of course, to follow next year…

We will also be launching a new live at home coaching program. That’s right — one of us will be spending two to seven nights on your sofa in the near future!

I’ve been doing this for 14 years. Brett Favre has been playing for 18 years. As long as he keeps throwing touchdown passes, I’m going to keep changing and affecting the lives of people who attend our workshops, seminars and Bootcamps.

Of course we’ll be coming out with a slew of new products, because as the dating world changes we are always ready to show you how to change with it!

So, mandatory retirement used to be at age 65. I plan on teaching a bunch of shuffle boarders in Florida the art of meeting hot sexy 80 year olds when I’m 80.

I will have the first and only geriatric pickup bootcamp in the history of the world.
I can see it now — my pants hiked up high to my chest leading around a bunch of guys who are all on arthritis medication who want to chase after some hot, sexy, experienced older women.

Thirty years from now, everyone who attends my geriatric Bootcamp will get a week’s worth of Cialis and Celebrex. Not only that, most of the people in my Bootcamp will have enlarged prostates, so I’ll have to give out something for that too. I can already see my Bootcamps in thirty years being sponsored by the pharmaceutical companies.

In the meantime, I’m young and healthy and ready to walk the next group of guys around at the the next Bootcamp. So this is the big announcement!

For those of you who were thinking to yourself, “Where’s my dating tip of the day?”, don’t worry. Here are a few tips for you. . .

1. PUT THE TIP IN FIRST: You don’t ever want to go in backwards.

2. USE THE DAVID WYGANT/BRETT FAVRE APPROACH: For those of you who may not be having sex today (and, hence, can’t make use of tip #1), you may need an approach tip of the day. So here it is: Say to the first person you see, “Did you hear that David Wygant just pulled a Brett Favre?” You want to talk about a great opening line! You meet the right woman, and she won’t know who David Wygant OR Brett Favre are.

3. 55 DAYS TO GO: For those of you who want a date tip, here it is. It’s November 5, 2009. There are approximately 55 days left in the year and before you will hopefully be staring at someone you’re about to kiss when the clock counts down 5-4-3-2-1 to midnight on New Year’s Eve. So the time to take real action on changing your dating life is now.

For those of you who want to see a very teary-eyed video, then check out the video I recorded yesterday. It will make you feel very warm and fuzzy…

Also, for any of you who are not yet on my subscriber list, I suggest you get on there quickly, because otherwise you’re missing a lot of special offers, private seminars, and FREE videos and podcasts that I give out just to my subscribers. You can sign up now in the box in the upper right hand corner of the page.