Today we have a SHORT podcast about blowjobs…

…every man’s favorite topic (next to boobs and sports).

This was sparked by a question from one of our lovely readers, Michelle. (Hey Michelle!)

Listen up, listen good, it’s time for David Wygant’s Podcast Wednesday:

So, men, what do you think? What should Michelle do in this situation?

How do YOU feel about blowjobs? Let me know in the comments below.

Well, ok, he didn’t really say that. But in my version he did.

So you meet a new woman, and she’s so full of sexual energy. She’s usually anywhere from 28 to 33. No offense to anybody older or anybody younger, but what happens is that a lot of women, right around the age f 30, start coming into their own sexuality. They start letting go of their inhibitions, realizing that sexually they have the freedom to do whatever they want. They start really enjoying sex more than ever before. The guilt is gone. It’s over. None of the Catholic guilt that they used to have from their family. None of the fear of friends calling her a whore or being labeled a slut by her peers.

All of a sudden, it seems like women kick into sexual overdrive. Right around 28 to 33, after which they just become these incredible, open, sexual beings.

The question to all you guys is: Can you handle a woman when she’s in that phase of her life? Or do you judge her? If you’re sitting across from a woman at a table, let’s say she’s 29 years old, and she says to you on a date, “I’ve slept with 18 guys.”

Are going to look at her and judge her? Are you going to look at her and shoot your nose up? What if she slept with more men than you’ve slept with women? What if you wish you’d slept with that many women? Are you going to be intimidated? What if you’ve slept with more? Are you still going to judge her? What if she tells you she’s slept with like 10 guys this month? Are you going to think she’s a slut? That she’s dirty?

Sexual Truth

I can feel all you — all of you — getting ready to type something in the comments section right now. I know Bob, you’re really ready to write something right now. I can feel it.

I know all of you are thinking right now of something to write. You’re probably judging. Maybe you’re saying to yourself, “I’m a great guy, I would never judge!”

But here’s the deal: who can tell you if or why she’s on a sexual escapade right now, or a sexual rampage? Don’t judge her. Embrace it. Have fun with the situation, and have fun with her. Stop with the double standard in life. There really is no double standard except inside your own mind. We all have different experiences in life, and we all set different standards for ourselves.

Stop judging women for expressing their sexuality and start embracing them and enjoying the gift they’re about to give you. As David Wygant said to Bob, “You can’t handle the blow job!” I’m sure Bob right now is laughing and saying to himself, “Hey, I’ve made the blog! My name is Bob.”

Now you are probably thinking right now that a driller has something to do with a weird new sexual position or kinky kind of sex. If that’s what you’re thinking, you’d be wrong.

The driller with whom I’ve been hanging once a week is my dentist. It seems that every time I go to the dentist nowadays, all she wants to do is drill me.

There is always something she wants to drill this, fill that and inject Novocaine everywhere. I think she must have been a miner in her past life.

Not only that, everyone I’ve sent to her office ends up getting drilled. I mean I know dentists make a lot of money drilling people, but so do hookers. So are dentists just big whores?

They are using some of the same tools that hookers use. Instead of a putting a condom on you when you get head, they use that spit thing to suck the saliva out of your head.

If you think about it, dentists are also like hookers because they keep everything wrapped in plastic. Sometimes they even put a bit camera in your mouth. Why don’t they put a condom on that instead of wrapping it in plastic?

Gee, I wonder why no one looks forward to going to the dentist. It’s a horrible experience.

So how does this relate to dating? You know I’m going to twist it somehow to make it relate.

It’s the end of the year, and some of you have not done enough drilling. Some of you are in inventory mode right now, thinking about the last time you had sex or the last time you had a date. Unfortunately, some of you have had a very dry 2009.

I’m not saying that to be salacious. It’s the truth.

At the end of the year, people go into inventory mode. That’s why it’s easy to have sex at Christmas parties. Some people decide that sex will be their gift for the holidays.

So you do some inventory, realize that you haven’t had enough of the opposite sex during the past year, get hammered, and then you decide this is the night you are going to break this dry spell. I’ve seen this happen over and over again.

People are a lot looser during the holidays. They haven’t gotten any all year long, and when it happens at the office Christmas party they think it must be the egg nog.

It’s not the egg nog. Women realize they haven’t had enough dick and will search one out whether it’s real or made of hard plastic. Men will happily be there to take part.

So on this Tuesday, with just a little more than two weeks to go before Christmas, what are you inventorying in your dating life? Also, what toy did you almost break in before the new year?