Relationships can really be frustrating. I mean, they’re battles at times. They really are.

You draw battles into relationships due to ego and expectations. So many things can go wrong in a relationship due, very often, to the way you communicate your needs, wants and desires to each other.

There are ways to be sure that relationship battles don’t cause permanent damage. Here are seven ways to avoid relationship disasters (which will also help you take your relationship to an even better place):

1.Have Sex On The Brain?: How much do you think about sex in your relationship? Do you feel like the other person doesn’t do the things you like to do (or doesn’t do them enough)? We all get lazy sexually in our relationships at times. So how do you get the other person to do these things (or to do more of those things)? Well, you don’t look at them and tell them they are doing what you like (or aren’t doing enough of it).

Instead, when they do things you like you need to really let them know. Say things like, “Oh babe, I love the way you kiss me and touch me. It makes me feel good…” Describe the emotions you have and how you feel when they do those things. Doing this will turn the other person on and make them want to do those things to you all night long. Whenever you come from a place of abundance like that, you will always bring you more of what you need.

2.Never Nag: Nagging doesn’t work. Nagging to get the dishes washed, the garbage taken out and the dog walked doesn’t work. Instead of nagging, ask out of love. Say something like, “Hey babe, I’m running late today. Do you mind walking the dog? That would be awesome and would help me out a lot!”

Asking this way is a lot better than asking by saying something like “You know, you never walk the dog. I’m always walking the dog, and I’m running late right now and don’t have time to do it” or “Can you please empty the dishwasher for once? I said I can’t do it right now. Why are you so lazy?” Asking nicely always gets you better results.

3.Learn The Art Of Compromise: Learning how to compromise in your relationship is essential. When you go on vacation, for example, make sure you split up the things you do 50/50 between things you like to do and things your partner likes to do. That way, one of you never feels like you are being dragged around the whole trip. Neither person will feel about the other that “it’s just about you.”

The best way to have real compromise is to find out what each other really wants. In this vacation example, you could say something like “Today I’d love to do this. What would you like to do tomorrow? How about if we make today my day and tomorrow your day (or make half of each day be yours)? That way we can both do things we enjoy.” Real compromise is about coming to an arrangement that makes both parties happy.

4.Be Forgiving Of Family: When dealing with each other’s family, it can be very stressful. You may have old things to mend with your mother or brother or sister which get you tense or upset. Because of this tense feeling, many of us will pick fights with our significant other — the person who are there with us to support us on this tense visit — because we don’t want to act out with our family. So we take out our frustrations on our partner instead.

So the next time you go with your partner to visit your family, write down ahead of time the things you need to do or work through with your family while you’re there. Let your partner help you and see them as being there with you (and for you). You will avoid so many unnecessary arguments.

5.Avoid The Passive-Aggressive Approach: In relationships, one person will sometimes drag their significant other with them when they are going out to meet friends. Then that person will spend the entire night not reminiscing, but bringing up personal things about the relationship in front of the friends. Your personal life is your personal life, and your friends do not need to be privy to all of it.

The way this happens sometimes, is that one person will take passive-aggressive jabs at the other. They will start hinting to the friends about the things they would really love to have in their relationship. This is a very passive-aggressive (and ineffective) way to raise these items.

If you have any personal needs or desires about which you want your partner to know, don’t bring those things up in public and in a passive-aggressive manner. You need to bring these things up with your partner in person and face-to-face. If you want your partner to do more of something, then tell them how much you would love it. Don’t bring it up in front of friends.

6.Don’t Air Your Dirty Laundry: When you get into a fight with your partner, do not tell your family and friends every little detail about it. When you do this, you are actually hurting your relationship. The reason is that even though your family and friends only want to support you, by knowing you had conflict they will judge your relationship and your partner after that.

They will judge your partner based on things you’ve said about them while you were upset or angry. Whenever you are speaking out of anger you will speak with disdain and venom, and often not tell all sides of the story. So keep your personal life between the two of you. It could save your relationship a great deal of unnecessary strain.

7.Do Something Special: In the midst of all these “don’ts,” I also have one “do” that you should do in helping to avoid relationship disaster. Every day, I want you to do at least three special things for your partner. Make them breakfast, walk the dog for them, rub their head, light candles or whatever you know they would really appreciate. Pick things that will make them feel wonderful, needed and warm.

Tell them that you love them. Send them ‘I love you’ texts, or something like that. Understand that the more you reach out to your partner and the more you express your love to your partner, the more intimacy you will have. You also make your relationship stronger each time you do things like this.

So, look at the above list and then at your own relationship. Ask yourself in how many of the relationship-destroying behaviors you and your partner engage. Ask yourself in how many of the relationship-building behaviors you and your partner engage. Then as to any areas you’re falling short, start making changes right away.

Having a great relationship takes work, patience and a lot of understanding. Don’t just give up on one before you work on it. If you do work on it and it still doesn’t work out, then at least you know you did everything you could to not only keep it from falling apart but to make it amazing.