I am in New York City for a few days. I saw a great sign yesterday here that said, “Don’t Honk — $350.00 Penalty.”
Now, how would they know who honked? What if four people honked all at once? Is that an instant $1,400.00 for the City of New York?
You got to love New York City. It’s the loudest city in the United States, and they think that one less car honking its horn will help.
Speaking of travel, let’s talk about traveling and dating . . .
So, you are dating somebody brand new, and you are really excited about them. You decide you are going to plan a weekend trip for the two of you to take together.
A weekend trip is so much fun, but do you know what is the most interesting thing about taking a weekend trip together? You are going to get to know this person better.
Let me tell you something. When you travel with someone, all the wrappers are taken off the candy.
You get to know all sorts of things about the other person you would not probably get to see at this point in your dating relationship. You get to know their bathroom habits. You get to know how long they spend in the bathroom. You get to see how they really look and act first thing in the morning.
Let me tell you something. People can’t pack all the stuff they protect themselves with at home. So on a trip, they expose themselves.
You get to know if they are grumpier in the morning than they’ve acted on those few nights you’ve spent together so far. You get to know more about what they are really like.
Traveling with somebody is the best way to get to know them. It is something that I tell people to do all the time.
If you are dating for a month, then go away for a night. Get them out of their home element. Get them to put their BlackBerry down. Take them out somewhere away from home.
After you’ve been dating someone for two months, go away for a weekend with them. Really get to know them more.
After three or four months of dating themsomeone, go away together for four or five days. Let me tell you, it is when you are away for this many days that all the shit really hits the fan.
You get to see them in all situations. You get to see them when they get frustrated at the airport. You get to see them when they’ve had a long and exhausting day. You get to see how they deal with all of those various “travel mishaps” that inevitably occur.
Traveling with somebody strips them down to their core, and gives you the opportunity to get to know them in all ways. I have had relationships in the past end after I took someone away for the weekend. Things would be great and then, all of a sudden, I’d be away for the weekend wondering who this monster was with whom I was spending the weekend.
So, one of the greatest things to do when you’re dating someone is to follow my travel schedule. If you follow my travel schedule, you are going to get to know somebody very, very quickly.
I travelled cross country with my Ex for 5 days and it nearly came to blows. We were ready to kill each other by the time we got there.
YES! There are so many things you can do to get to know the underlying habits or reactions of your partner, but traveling with them is probably the number one revealer. Once, at the airport on my way to Vegas, I stood in line behind a black couple (in their early 30’s) who appeared to be recently dating because they were embracing as if they were stuck to each other from the moment they got in line.
So anyway,at the checkpoint they stopped the girl because she had several toiletries that exceeded the 2 oz requirement. Most of the stuff was regular sized and so they said she couldn’t take that stuff onto the plane; she either had to surrender it or go back to baggage claim and put them in her suitcase. She began to question the 2 oz policy and said that she wasn’t gonna surrender all her toiletries. Her man looked like he wanted to say something to her, but couldn’t because they didn’t know each other well enough. It just seemed like they had never traveled together (or in her case, at all!). I’m sure her man saw a side of her he never saw before. I saw it too and was like, I’m glad I’m not him.
I’m sure the guy probably thought, hey, toss it and i’ll buy you all this stuff when we get to vegas. But then again, he probably didn’t know how much that crap cost and wouldn’t wanna shell out that much money. Bitches be buying stuff from Sephora these days!
One of the other things you can do to find out about your date is to check their car. The condition of their car will usually tell you how clean of a person they are. If you are lucky enough, go see their room on a random day. My sister used to live with me and she’d always clean her room before her boyfriend would come by, but as soon as he left, it went back to being a pig-sty. Drop in on your date by surprise and if she has a clean room, then she’s a clean girl.
I always wondered when in the relationship and if you should split the cost of trips. The one nighter seems like no big thing.
What do you recommend for longer trips?
P.S. This tests works with everyone. Traveling with someone does reveals a lot about a person, especially if you hit a few bumps along the ways and how they react to those situations.
Super post David!
I recently spent the weekend with someone I’ve been seeing and this is the absolute truth. Better to find out what the deal is up front than to let an illusion build and end up with a bed in a burning house. Thankfully, my recent experience brought us closer and showed me that she might be someone worth building a future with. Great advice.
I’d go for the split, that way it’s not such a big waste if you find out they’re nuts. Besides, if they don’t agree to splitting you just found out something really important about them.
Great post. I’m going to be going away to Las Vegas (we’d have prefered somewhere else,but its an affordable student holiday) with my lucky lady. We’ve been together 9 months now, and we’re both looking forward to it. Especially now with this post, I feel even more excited. I know that in getting to know each other better, we will have a stronger relationship and appreciation for each other.
Geeez, simple yet so profound… duh!
Thanks David, that never even occurred to me but makes complete sense.
The only experience that I can relate on is living with who you’re dating… now that’s where you REALLY get to know someone
This on the money, my friend. It’s the times that you spend consecutive nights together (and days, for that matter) that will truly tell what kind of relationship you’ll have with them.