During these tough economic times, one of the things you need to know how to do is something I call “recession-proof dating.” I really get sick and tired of people using the recession and the bad economy as an excuse why everything in their life not only isn’t working but CAN’T work. That’s completely untrue!
Life goes on regardless of the state of the economy, and you can have an amazing dating life no matter what the state of the world’s (or your own personal) economy is like. In fact, there are many things you can do during these tough economic times to enjoy an amazing life while still making sure that your dating life doesn’t lead you to become a victim of the current economic downturn.
There are things you can do right now to make sure you keep your finances in your pockets as you’re out there dating. Here are 6 ways to engage in “recession-proof dating:”
1. Never “Over Date”: I know this is something that a lot of you do (even though you know you shouldn’t do it). So many people will go out on dates that they can’t afford. A date for me is an opportunity for two people to share stories, share things about themselves and get to know each other to see whether or not they want to hang out again. So why are you going out and spending money on expensive dinners for a first date? It makes no sense to me. Go out on recession-proof dates.
Coffee is what I call a recession-proof date. Take a walk outside. Even if it’s cold, it’s fun to walk and get to know each other. There are so many great things to do that don’t cost a lot of money. To be a recession-proof dater, think about setting a $10.00 limit for a first date. If you are that person who finds it offensive that you are not being taken on an expensive first date, then you really need to re-look at why you are dating. Dating is not about getting a free meal (and an expensive free meal at that). Dating is about connecting with somebody so that together you can figure out what to do next.
2. Don’t Offer To Co-Sign: If you are involved in a relationship with somebody and it is a new relationship, don’t co-sign anything for someone. They may have bad credit. I heard so many horror stories from people who have co-signed loans for people. Yes, you might think that you love that person, but do you know right now that you will love them for the next three years and love them enough to be willing to take over the lease payments on their 2008 Honda Civic?
You need to think about your own financial situation, because it is important to protect your own credit. I’m not telling you not to be generous, but think about the person for whom you are considering co-signing a loan. Most relationships blow up over finances. So give your new relationship an opportunity to decide where it’s going before you commit the fate of your credit rating to someone.
3. Steer Clear Of Loans: You will often have someone you’re dating ask if you can lend them money . . . but just for 24 hours or a few days or “just until they get back up on their feet” or something similar. How many times have I heard stories about men who have gone out on only a few dates with a woman, and then the woman will say she’s having a “tough time right now” and asks him if he can help her out with a temporary loan to cover her rent. Now I am all for helping someone with whom you already are in a relationship and someone you already love.
Do not, however, help out someone you don’t know well. You are not a charity. This is just a first (or second or third) date. A lot of men get sucked in by the allure of a beautiful woman, especially in towns like Los Angeles and New York. Never give financial help to someone with whom you are not in a relationship. Don’t bail someone out of a financial problem until you are fully in a relationship with them.
4. Exercise Cell Phone Restraint: Make sure you are always cognizant of the terms of your text plan and your cell phone minute plan. A lot of you don’t realize that all of the cell phone companies have unlimited minute calling. Some of you who don’t have unlimited texting will get involved in a new relationship and start texting with that person nonstop, only to get hit with a $300.00 bill at the end of the month. So be aware of what your cell phone minute and text limitations are on your plan before you start using them with reckless abandon with someone new you’re dating. If you are dating someone new and you know you’ll likely be texting and/or calling that person a lot, then build up your plan so you don’t waste a lot of money on extra charges.
5. Go With Quality Over Quantity: When online dating, you don’t need to be on seventeen dating sites (spending $39.00 each a month) to find good people to meet. That’s a waste of money. Just pick one good one like Yahoo! Personals and stay on it. Think of online dating as a giant bar in cyberspace. One day you might approach somebody and they might not be into you. Two weeks later, though, you send another email and they might respond favorably. So stick to one online dating site and conserve your funds. When you pick quality over quantity, there are always tons of great people to meet.
6. Don’t Use The Recession As An Excuse: Don’t use the economy as an excuse not to have an amazing dating life and as an excuse not to get out there and meet people. You can be smart with your money, live within your means, and still experience fantastic connections with people of the opposite sex as well as bettering your own skills with the opposite sex. Investing a little money into getting to know yourself better is always important and a high priority. Sometimes you may have to get a little creative with how you do it, but investing in yourself and in your own life is always a wise use of your finances.
When it comes down to recession-proof dating, realize that when you keep your money in your pocket and make smarter dating-related spending decisions, you will have a lot more time and energy to date. You will also take a lot of the very unnecessary financial stress so many people feel out of the dating equation. So go out and keep meeting people knowing you can enjoy an amazing dating life right now.
Should we take our dates to Walmart, David?
No more stretch limos, broadway shows and nice dinners….that’s the end of me..No fun dating anymore
Great list! There are tons of things to do on a date for cheap or free.
I’ve had a few guy friends complain to me that they didn’t want to date seriously until they had more money, which has always seemed weird to me, even though now I “get it” better than I did when I was younger. My attitude has always been “if a girl really likes you/you really like each other, than money doesn’t matter”. In getting older, I realized that a lot of men tie how much they make, their productivity, etc to how manly they feel. Additionally, of course, that some women only care about how much he makes.
My mom’s sense of things is, if you can get along well while you are poor, getting along well when you have money is a piece of cake. If you can’t get a long well while you are poor, your relationship may not be worth it.
Tell you what Marina,
If you behave at Walmart, then I’ll take you to Taco Hell, and we’ll go dutch…
Marina
that cancels our trip on that yacht. You remember the yacht club. Matter of fact my dues are coming up. lol
J-Dude
Wal Mart does not sound like a bad place how about Mc Donald’s on a tight budget.
J-Dude
Both of our Wal Marts have Subway. We can dine there.
If a guy can not take me out on a date how about him and I getting together and I will cook him a good meal. Then we can sit back and watch some boob tube and do whatever comes natural. Go outside and sit on the porch and watch nature. I do live in the country or how about going out on a drive. We have a bike trail that we can go walking on and share a good conversation. Just being together means a lot not just because someone is broke or has a pocket full of money.
lol, I don’t think number 1 applies to me as I’ve never had much money to begin with.
Excellent Blog! I am suspicious of guys who over-play their hand and pleasantly surprised by the more initially restrained guys. Good advice for the the less confident who try to make up for it with bigger gestures. It may be easier to get some women initially but it’s also easier to be duped and taken advantage of. Use this simple approach to weed out the bling-bling girls who will use, misuse, and finally dispose of you.
J Dude
I you behave next time we will go on a car ride and I will read you an erotic story, a car ride have never felt so fast..
hey sandra
now that sounds great – cooking together and then kick back and hang out in the nature. We all live so stressful lives that you can really stand out from the crowd if you do something slow and smooth
Dating should be a fun thing to do it is not about if the guy is a multi-millionaire for if the women is seeking one of those she should sit back and dream of a man like Brad Pitt. OOPS that would be in my nightmares. There are times when people don’t have the cash flow to take a girl on her dream date. But two people should be able to work out something if they want to be together.
Loans: What does the guy look like Wells Fargo Bank. That to me would be embarassing hey David when you hit the lottery have your accountant clip me off a million dollar check. lol. Get their Social Security number so you can claim them as your dependent on your income taxes since the person has to support them. Co-Signing since when did the guy purpose to me this is a dating thing not a hey dude co-sign this agreement with me. That is like getting him drunk and dragging him to the alter. lol. Cell phone usage: hey look if they are willing to help pay that bill better tell sweetheart lets meet in person instead of using up my cash and yours. Times are hard enough to have to support someone you barely know. What did you do take the person on to raise. Oh I would not even ask my parents to co-sign a loan for me much less a guy. Using the recession as an excuse is a cope out maybe the person is not interested since you are not as rich as the President Of The United States. That person needs to join a yacht club.
And even in a yacht club those guys want you to sign a prenupt agreement they are not stupid. Since when did dating become a get rich quick scheme.
instead of cope out it is cop out.
Oh one more…This blog reminded me of something this has to do with one of my friends.
Me and her were talking about guys and they are some she would say:
Her: He has a house any woman would die for.
Me: Oh he does what does it look like.
She goes into detail of the house now comes to the best part.
Her: I would like to see his engagement ring on my finger.
Me: Dream on woman dream on.
Moral to this conversation when a guy thinks you want to tie him down that is a good way to see him run.
See spot run see spot head for car see spot disappear like grease lightning. lol some humor in all of this. It is best to allow the relationship to grow into what it may become to rush things and deal with what is at the present. The future can wait and sometimes so do we. Kay Sarah Whatever will be will be the future is not ours to see Kay Sarahh Sarrah what will be will be. Life goes on.
pardon me do not rush things as long as you are with each other don’t allow anything to come between that which has been set up.
Good bye gonna hire housemaid if I don’t get this place cleaned up.
Dating as it has developed from on line all began to blur into baiting ~ so perhaps in this recession looking for friends by group outings might be a wise choice.
“Group Outings” ~ those take the place of ye ol meet n greets which also became free for all shams.
I never loan money to people. It is a bad thing to do for them as well as for you. I would never borrow money from people either.
As for some of the other ideas on there. They all sound great.
Mike
Slightly off topic . . . but I thought this was pretty funny:
From fail blog . . . about dating . . .. A “suggestion” . . .
Images don’t post, here is the link http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/fail-owned-impression-fail.jpg