Comments on: Perfection Do You Desire It?

By: Savonniere

Savonniere — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 19:53:28 +0000

David, i’ve been reading through your pages of advice. Some of it is quite astute. This page needs a little work. I’m exactly the woman you speak of whom you claim is unrealistic in her expectations for herself. I’m 39 and have dated several men younger than me. Why? Because I enjoy life. I know who I am and have learned from life. I take excellent care of myself and it shows. Men don’t like insecure women and that includes the younger ones. Personally I don’t have an age requirement when it comes to dating but I find when I apply to a dating site that there is a large disparity between the ages of men who message me. 60-70% are men who are at least 5-10 years old than me. 20-30% are anywhere from 5-10 years younger than me. The smallest percentage are from men my age. Why? Because men my age think they can find someone younger than they are. Sometimes they do. You certainly wouldn’t begrudge them for finding their mate even though they’re younger, right? Please don’t begrudge the women who can love with a man at any age. We’re out there. Might as well get used to it.

By: Lily

Lily — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 20:55:00 +0000

David, I caught your excitement in the sand castle video. You are so right! Life is about having fun! Of course we all have work to do, but what are you working for if you never stop to enjoy life? Sometimes it’s the small things that can help make us happy. By the way, I don’t care so much about looks as long as a man is generally clean and healthy and just normal looking. I do care about how nice a man really is, not just to me, but a man who really cares about everything in life and has confidence in who he is. I personally think people have to like themselves first before they can be who they really are to other people.
I think that is why you are so successful is that you exude confidence.

By: Dana

Dana — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 04:42:49 +0000

OK, wait a minute. You talk to anyone who’s had any success in life whatsoever and almost universally, they will tell you they made goals and had standards. That’s how millionaires are made, that’s how college degrees and honors are won, that’s how military folks get promoted to general and admiral.

Yet when it comes to dating we’re supposed to just sort of drift along and leave ourselves completely open to whatever comes along. No standards, no nothing, just drift.

…What???

Sorry, I tried the drifting thing. It doesn’t work.

Now this is not to say you are completely wrong. You can’t know by looking at someone that they don’t meet your standards, unless your standards include “cares enough about themselves to keep themselves neat and clean.” And if your only standard is that they have to look perfect, they could be a serial killer behind the so-called perfection.

But. Don’t tell people not to have standards. That’s just stupid.

By the way? Nice misogyny there. Because I’ve seen enough personal ads to know that it’s not usually the women demanding “height/weight proportionate” and “cute.” Whatever you think we fantasize about, in reality we accept a much wider range than men do. MUCH wider.

By: Spencerella

Spencerella — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 20:18:27 +0000

I apologize to you if I don’t seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don’t like the feeling. You’re sitting there, you’re wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I’m not really interested, should I play like I’m interested but I’m not that interested but I think he might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she’s not interested? So all of the sudden I’m getting, I’m starting to get interested… And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it’s awkward, it’s like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you’re trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don’t kiss them at all? It’s very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you’re just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called “just the tip”. Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you’re on my hair.”

hahahahahahahahaha

By: Khiem

Khiem — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 21:21:50 +0000

Kevin,

You answered your own question…. you said “what if you have been PURSUING [...]?” That’s your problem right there. Stop pursuing, start attracting!

And to attract someone, you have to learn to project and convey yourself authentically, genuinely, powerfully and confidently. Once you do that, you’ll start getting the success that you desire.

David,

You reconcile the thought of giving up the ideal with not settling for less by making sure you give your darn best at every opportunity you get WHILE recognizing that it may not always work out the way you want it.

By: Kevin

Kevin — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 14:23:28 +0000

Pretty good and valid article. But my question is this – what if you have been persuing for so long (women from 7 to 10) and you still have no dates, emails, relationships? What do you do then?

By: Rich

Rich — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 09:06:44 +0000

I love the idea of the sand castle competition. It always helps me to do something completely goofy to start not caring as much. Makes all the difference in the world. All the guys out there should take this video seriously.

By: vs

vs — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 04:11:14 +0000

Hi Everyone,

welcome back, this is my favorite bloc ever! I’m 5’5″ tall i guess so well, still i prefered 6′ tall. Y? because i’m not that tall and let’s forget about the height. I noticed most of the guys 6′ tall not really attract enough. they think they taller than other but still do not have balls enough. Let me put in this way they are just like a STONE!!

” But the fact is that you have to embrace who you are every single day, and become the most powerful version of yourself. If you’re not the most powerful version of yourself, you won’t be able to sweep anybody off of their feet.”

I agreed with wygant said above. become a better version that my favorite word!

By: JustMe

JustMe — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 04:05:15 +0000

Haha, okey! Write me a profile then
Can’t wait to be swept off my feet

By: David

David — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 04:04:04 +0000

David-

How do you reconcile this thought of giving up the ideal with not settling for less? I don’t want a second-rate, rebound love.