Hey everyone back from NYC and before we go into today’s subject here are some random highlights.
If you are looking to relax when you are in NYC do not stay at the Hudson Hotel. The rooms are shoebox small, the halls are dark and make you feel like you are staying in a mental facility!
But the worst part is you have to walk through all the drunken people to get to the elevator and your room which leads me to my next highlight. As we were walking through the lobby we had to avoid a guy who thought having a 3 way would be a great idea that night.
No kidding here, my girlfriend and I had to run away from him after he he tried to dance with us in the bar.
Quite a funny scene and we spent the weekend laughing about our new found friend.
Guys when a man and his girl are nice to you that is not an invitation to play in the bedroom.
Some men really need to read this blog more and learn that when a woman is nice it does not mean SEX!!
The rest of the weekend was quite relaxing walking around the city and enjoying the sights and sounds of NYC.
So lets talk about how to really connect with people.
Everyone you talk to – I don’t care if it’s a man, a woman, a child, or a dog – take away three things about them.
If you find out three things about someone, and you have emotionally connected with them and they’ve shared these things with you – the next time you see them, you can say, “so how’s your mom doing in her real estate business?” Or, “hey, look, it’s Fluffy the Golden Retriever! Is he still chewing on his foot?”
Most men are, in my opinion, walking penises. They’re just walking around with their groin leading them, and their penis says, “Oh look, hot woman” and directs their attention there.
So then when they walk over to her, their penis is the one doing the talking: “Um, hi… I’m just killing 30 seconds here because I really want to get your phone number…” And guess what? The hot woman can tell!
But if you go up to her, find three things out about her, and then leave, you can say, “It was so amazing talking to you about Italian roast coffee. See you later, Coffee Girl!”
All of a sudden, the woman is so connected to you – because you’re using your mind, and not your dick.
Men don’t realize that women do want your penis, but they want your mind first. They go for the big head first, and the little head second! And once they get your big head, they’ll adore the little one!
another great blog D.
i used to think with my “one eyed monster” first, and i see thats not the right mindset to have anymore, now i keep it in check, try to use the head first, unless i am talking to horny lisa, marina, and sandra:)
That is so funny David that guy in the bar wanted to have 3some, when you and your girlfriend was so nice to him. He so was thinking about his one eyed monster like howe call it:)
Did he even ask about who you guys were, and get deep into it?
dr.who- this maybe a stupid question but what is another name do you use for your little friend?
and how about the ladies…..what are some nick names do you give to his little friend or your little friend?
howe-
That is a stupid question…….j/k
I would call my little friend- the little terrorist:)
ahahhahahahhah that is too funny Doctor, i think you will scare the women away!
I have to say this morning I was guilty of that, I saw this really cute European woman, she was wearing a miniskirt, nice smooth leg, tight body, god she had a amazing body! I was so attracted to her body, and then I had to remind myself that I got say something, and not think too much about my little friend.
howe- wtf? this post is not about what nicknames you give to your dick….LOL
Lance-
did you say something to her or you froze up? I’m curious……
lance- just trying to have some fun and learning, learning can’t be too serious, or else it gets boring too easily.
Doctor Who-
I approached her based on a observation that I learned from the MMS……and she really opened man that was crazy, at first I thought that she would reject me, but no man, she just opened up. I realized i make some bad assumption before i open someone.
Well props to you for going up to her, and making it happen. I feel like you have that few seconds to go for it or you lose it all. I am still nervous when it comes to meeting beautiful women, that is the next step for me to learn to approach women confidently. I can approach women who I am not attracted to but when it comes to someone I am attracted to I freeze some reason. I am going to have to check out the MMS, does it go deep into the approach, and how to get the phone number?
You guys are cracking me up today!
Nicknames for your little head? I’ll share something personal.
I once had a funny dirty talk with my last g/f. We were in public… so we couldn’t use overt names for various body parts… so I created a story around how my little one wanted to meet her little one.
So it became a recurring inside joke. “Steve” missed kissing “Stephanie”. He couldn’t wait to kiss her… and slowly stroke her…
I think you guys get the picture.
Yes it does, what I like the most is that, its all natural and I feel its just more than getting a number its about getting your life together. It is not a instant magic pill, it takes a little time to grasp, and become the master at doing it.
At first, I wasn’t able to approach women because I was so in my head, but now I just go do it, even though I still have the fear, it loses its power as you do it more Doctor. All my past life I have never imagined me to open a hot woman, but now, I am able to at least open them without feeling like shit.
—-when a woman is nice it does not mean SEX!!
So true, this is actually the reason why it’s so much harder to flirt innocently over here, compared to Europe. Playfulness does not equate I want get your…Willie, Shaft, One Eyed Monster or the little terrorist.
—-And once they get your big head, they’ll adore the little one!
Yes, if you are real you will make us want you in any conceivable way imaginable. If you make us feel you are completely into us, we will be ready way more than you think and yes we will ADORE the little one too..
Nice to see Howe is not completely rehabilitated yet…
hey Coach Khiem-
that is a great one steve and stephanie:)
now can i call you coach steve, instead of coach khiem?
i have never done that way of dirty talk, what you said after slowly stroke her……?
Khiem,
Yeah…you have captive audience now…we are taking notes…
haha, yeah the Hudson Hotel is not great for relaxation. They make the rooms tiny, and claim they are being space efficient. I actually like the library bar and the tables in the hallways. Good spot if you are there for a date and it’s not totally nuts yet. Funny people watching also makes for funny conversation.
Next time maybe try the Empire. I haven’t been in the rooms, but the scene isn’t nearly as nuts, and they do have a nice roof bar.
yes i have my paper and pen handy, and so is my one eyed monster taking notes:)
Marina- so true what you said “—-when a woman is nice it does not mean SEX!!”
I personally have lot of experience with that, i have taken them too seriously, and thought that it was a sexual invite when she was interested at me as friend. That is maybe because I tired to get everyone I met. How do you get out of the friend zone, and get a woman to see you in sexual ways?
Rick:
How do you get woman to feel chemistry for you? You need get in their head, and really listen to them with heartfelt interest, no bullshit man! They can see through all the bullshit from getting hit on by tons of men daily.
Read through what Marina had to say again, you will see that, it all starts in their mind, you connect with it, and they end up chasing you for your little friend, some might say…..little terrorist, magic bullet, steve and stephanie, willie, shaft, and one eyed monster
just whatever it is that you call.
Thanks a million coach Kub, i am reading it again! I guess I make it complicated in my head by thinking about it too much.
Rick,
Sometimes it’s about giving a tad more intense signals, maybe stand a bit closer, look in her eyes a bit longer, but do it so that she can pull back if it’s not mutual. We girls feel your energy and notice the change if you start being interested. Then if she gives similar signals back, then it’s a matter of time. But sometimes it’s also worth just taking a chance and tell her what you fell, if you are trying to get out of the friend zone.
If you are in a room and you give the sexual energy, not just friendly energy, to everyone then we girl will pick up on it and it actually becomes a turn off. You will come across as just another player. See it gets hot when you talk to a bunch of girls in a friendly way and maybe give sexual energy to one of them. All of the girls will pick up on it and because you were friendly to them all, the other girls actually will end up helping you because they will encourage their friend to go with you.
Howe,
It’s all about using metaphors… and I really don’t remember what I said. But it went along like…
Steve really wants to caress Stephanie again. He only wants to make her feel good deep inside because he loves the way she makes him feel when he’s close to her. Right now, he’s getting super excited just at the thought of playing with her tonight. I don’t know if he would be able to contain himself.
He’d want to slowly stroker her body, slowly, gently.. making her feel the passion he has for her. [insert more description..]. He loves feeling the softness of her skin…
Rick- you are on a great path!
The more you think about it, try to be perfect, and analyze everything, the more you will be in your head.
Think less and do more!
And she loves feeling the feeling of his hard body ahahah
coach khiem-
that is great, never thought about it that way, you really opened my eyes- do you think I can use it like the way you mentioned, i am copying it down?
btw….are you touching her when you say that?
Howe,
You can use it however you want.
I’ve used it over the phone… just to get her excited and thinking about sex with me.
And I’ve used it as straight dirty talk when we are about to do the deed, while I’m caressing her. I basically storytell her what I’m doing to her in that case. It gets her emotions and her imagination involved in the whole sexual experience… which creates much strong feelings of pleasure and intimacy.
the feeling of his hard body…..against her softness of her skin, puts her in complete ecstasy, she can’t help but warp her whole body against his like they both never want to let go of each other:)
coach Khiem and Yakub-
you guys are getting me turned on:)
i bet horny sandra will be on her vibrator tonight for sure after reading this, and beg for more:)
And she pulls him in and starts gripping his …Beep…leaving him defenseless…and breathless..
Yakub… wanna play… finish each other’s story? LOL
And as they fall into each other’s embrace, Steve and Stephanie feel like they are melting into each other, not even knowing when one starts and one stops. The warmth of his body against hers makes her feel completely naked, completely open. She wants to feel, she wants to receive so much of his love.
Marina, you can’t use overt wording here… this is supposed to be metaphors based… b/c I had to do it in places where people aren’t supposed to know what we are talking about LOL
oh look at what is going on here!
I am really enjoying this blog today, especially how the coaches are sharing their dirty talk, I think it should be kept secret Coach Yakub and Khiem. Howe might use it with the wrong intention, and hurt some women:)
Oh Marina- seems like already on the vibrator, and getting it on with the coaches:)
I can’t help, i am now in it too:)
Howe,
I think you are learning something important here besides the whole dirty talk example.
Arousal (and therefore most orgasms) is a mental thing. If you can arouse a woman by the way you talk to her, by the way you look at her, by the way you touch her… from truly being aware of her emotions… and making a point of appealing to those emotions, it doesn’t matter what “PUA techniques” you use.
A woman (and men for that matter) are very emotional. The more you understand that, the better you get at connecting… and subsequently seducing them.
Kheim, Marina- lets play and finish the story:)
I bet howe is getting really excited here by now! LOL
HOWE this is how its done, now just pay attention:)
Khiem,
I was making my own story…I am not into a threesome anyway..You and Yakub are on your own
Marina said:
“If you are in a room and you give the sexual energy, not just friendly energy, to everyone then we girl will pick up on it and it actually becomes a turn off. You will come across as just another player. See it gets hot when you talk to a bunch of girls in a friendly way and maybe give sexual energy to one of them. All of the girls will pick up on it and because you were friendly to them all, the other girls actually will end up helping you because they will encourage their friend to go with you.”
Thank you Marina, that was a great comment! Really eye opening =D
c’mon marina i am taking notes today…..tell us more, maybe not 3some, but continue:)
this blog is fuckin awesome, i said it so many times before, and the coaches rock!
Jimmi,
Hey you are supposed to be the well balanced one…you are beginning to sound like Howe…Damn that boy is bad influence..
Add with your own story…
i like it when marina uses overt words:) i think she is the dominant one in the bed is it true marina?
oh he is so bad influence Marina.
Last thing in the world I want to do is sound like howe:)
add with my own story huh……coaches do i have permission to play?
Howe,
I cant make up any reality I want….
using your imagination to turn each other one is the most powerful one, just remember not to make it too obvious what the ending will be.
Jimmi,
Is that the same attitude you use to approach girls..Tsk Tsk..Ask first, just do it, with a FUCK it attitude.
Jimmi, of course you can play.
The more the merrier!
And I’ll have to agree with Marina here. The art of dirty talk is to really appeal to the sense of fantasy. You want to let the person’s imagination run its course. You want to say or describe enough to create a vivid picture in the person’s mind but you also want to leave certain things vague… or blank… so that the person’s imagination can fill those blanks in with their own ideas of what is happening.
It’s the art of using intrigue and curiosity at its best.
so i have to keep the ending vague you are saying or else she will lose the taste?
It’s not so much the end as the phrasing. Re-read some of the stuff Yakub and I write. It’s descriptive… yet not. It’s descriptive enough that you can see what it means… but it’s vague enough where you can imagine it in whichever way you want.
ok cool thanks!
I guess I have to develop that fuck it attitude a bit more!
Coaches or everyone- i am curious is there a video that shows a great example of arousing her by your look, any movie scene? I am thinking about James bond movies the one with Daniele Craig, do you think he does that by looking at the woman?
I see that is deep what you have to say Khiem!
ok i am re-reading it coaches, this is really eye opening!
I feel like I missed out on reading womens emotions on the moment!:( b/c i have been thinking too much about my little steve:)
and for you Jimmi- i am curious what you are going to say next…..i am taking notes, if you are ready:)
But on the other hand there are people who would make dirty talk into something very explicit and not subtle and suggestive. Dirty talk is it not more what makes you feel comfortable and how the other party responds to the way you talk. Some people love to get so graphic that it’s almost overwhelming. Nothing is left for the imagination, but each to their own…we all have our fantasy to live
like Khiem mentioned, you are learning something more important than dirty talk here. It’s not just about pump and dump, it’s beyond that. Take your time one step at a time, and focus on getting deeper in her mind, and keep it vague, and she will tell you how she wants to be led my friend!
Oh that is so right Marina- it has to be subtle and suggestive!
too many guys just go for the magic spot right away, and it just not fun, and imaginative for her!
hello everyone happy tuesday!
David I have suggestion for the next blog, “dirty talk pt.1-free to practice with your fellow members”
lol @ the 3 way guy
Man… I’m still waiting on the next commenter to pickup where I last left off in this dirty talk epic!
This blog is so much better than other pua blogs I used to read in the past, it was all about bunch of guys writing about how to get some pussy, so many weird people, thank goodness I am not a member of those forums and blogs!
yea me too!
where is Marina, Jimmi, and Coach Kub?
Yakub,
Yes that works for most women, but from a woman’s view trying to turn on a guy does a lot of guys not respond well to very dirty explicit talk. Kind of reenacting a real dirty porn movie in his instead of a suggestive sensual movie. Just not sure, as it seem that different people would find different kind of stories exciting. I guess I not really that good at very dirty kind of talk, really not sure I would like it honestly.
Ok, I need some blog intervention, someone please stop me.
Dr Who,
Daniel Craig’s James Bond does it. Watch any movie with Judd Law, Brad Pitt, George Clooney or Johnny Depp… they all have that very strong masculine and leading presence. Watch how they talk to women.
I know “The Holiday” had Judd Law give GREAT eye contact to the girl. He has this sly smile that’s irresistible. Watch how he looks at her and talks to her. He uses a lot of pauses… he’s vulnerable at times… he’s leading and claiming her at other times.
It’s wonderful.
I have never seen “the holiday” will have to check it out, thanks for the recommendation!
No offence, but women are guilty of thinking too far ahead too. I have had plenty of female friends that misinterpreted my nice and attentive attitude to mean romantic attraction. I’m usually just genuinely interested in people, so I’ve had to push women away that wanted more than I was offering.
Then I started reading the comments and everyone got silly. I often enjoy the comment space, but please, this isn’t summer camp. Call it what you want, but no one but Kheim gets points for originality in my book.
Mike
Mike,
For a lot of people this is not something that comes easy, figuring out how to balance a healthy relationship. I was with the same for 16 years and you have to change it up once in a while and honestly I think I did not do enough of this kind of playfulness. Sex is just one aspect, “dirty talk” is as a much of a “warm” up/turn on, as actually touching each other. With 3 kids around all the times, when we had really fun moments later, was when we had played around verbally a whole day like this with subtle comments to each other.
Mike
Summer camp what did I miss?
I loved summer camp at times by the way
ok stop marina- there is my intervention!
now you can practice on the blog as much as you can so we can all see what works or not, i am free at anytime for you to practice:)
How did this blog segway into dirty talk?
sorry howe got caught up with some work, so couldn’t finish it up with Khiem, however to be continued next time:)
David- i am wondering the same thing……:)
Yakub
ITs funny but i read through the posts and all of a sudden the topic when to dirty talk. Not even close to what I was speaking about today at all.
Its funny how things can get so random.
Howie
Once again when a conversation turns to sex you are right on it!!
Seduction is all about intrigue and you spew too much leaving nothing to the imagination.
mike,
how does khiem get all the points and no one else? Ohhhh we feel left out today:(
its like that t-mobile commercial, I want to be your top 5 man:)
David- thanks, i realized i got to calm myself down, and do more intrigue when it comes to sex, i am getting better at it, right marina don’t you agree?
David-
I think howe is the guy in the bar that tried to dance with you and your girlfriend for a 3some:)
Howe
Yes you do need to calm down…….dont ask marina if you got it right just relax and let things happen as they will.
and yes this blog is totally random today!
Leonard
Very funny……..he has the same mentality as the guy who danced with my girl
David- where can I find the video that you talked about what it looks like to be an alpha male?
David- i would never do that to you man, however i would try to buy both you some drinks so you can give me some coaching or bar approach i could do. More like wingcouple:)
Dr. Who- just check out the movies that Khiem mentioned, its the same thing! I think you are thinking too much about it.
Sorry David,
was on topic first, then detoured, used my quota of being quasi serious on yesterdays blog. That was really a great one, loved it.
To howe:
>>>>>>I can’t help, i am now in it too:)
Hope you don’t mean the vibrator, lol.
I think this Blog. Another great Blog.
I love this blog and comments! LOL.
Dirty talk eh? My ex and I had our first innocent dirty talk and our metaphor was: forest. He described what his was like and I described what mine was like. He added in some other stuff so I added a little humor, asking if it had crabs! Get it? But it went back to sensualness…
hey David Great post very enlightening thanks
Marina – great initial comments but be careful of Howe – I think that he is parked somewhere writing a script for his next pua encounter with YOUR tips!
As for Steve and Stephanie – perhaps Khiem and Yakub need to do a blog on public conversational skills for arranging their “play dates” – people won’t know if they each have kids or dogs!
Marina, this is not me feeling insecure. I understand the nature of dirty talk. I’ve seen enough movies.
Obviously all of you are going to feel some level of comfort talking about your pet names for penises in here but it is silly to me. Kheim provided something original, the rest of you all sound like kids at summer camp discovering a bad word for the first time.
What about your fun dip? Or your express elevator (only goes straight up)? Or my very own Mr. Peanut (I’ll even provide top hat and monocle)?
Just saying, be more original and you will all be more interesting. imho.
Some years ago, a good friend of mine told me that he was so excited about getting together with this girl that evening. He says, “Aw, Man! When I get her alone tonight, Imma have to introduce her to Snoopy!”
Yes…. I ended up stealin’ his name for the pecker. Sad sad man, I am.
Sorry bout the tangency of my last entry folks. As you were.
David,
You have GOT to tell me about Italian roast coffee! I didn’t know it could be so amazing.
David-
First time poster, your blog is something else man.
I’m at school in Boulder and made my first visit to ideal market today after hearing
you mention it in the interview with david d. A great expansion to boulders older crowd
and a fine followup for my saturday bikerides to barnesnnobles/whole foods.
You know what I’m talking about.