Meet More Men And Reapply
December 17, 2008 
25 Comments
Have you met a guy during the last six months whom you really liked a lot, but for some reason or other things just didn’t work out with him?
Perhaps you two went out and you (or he) over-thought things after the date.
Perhaps the two of you never called each other thinking the other would make that first phone call.
Perhaps he called you, but due to an unbelievably hectic work week you don’t return his call and leave him a message until five days later. Then he didn’t call you back because he thought you weren’t interested.
Is there any guy whom you met in the last six months about whom you always think “I wish I could go out with this guy one more time?” What is stopping you from contacting this guy? Why aren’t you contacting him?
I think the fact that you are not contacting this guy is the biggest mistake. I also know why you aren’t doing it. You aren’t contacting this guy because your ego is getting in the way. You are thinking “Well I don’t really want to contact him, because if he was interested in me he would call me.”
Is that true? Maybe. Maybe not. I’m not a mindreader, and neither are you. Maybe he was interested in you. Maybe HIS ego isn’t letting him show you his interest. There is only one way to know the answer to that question.
The reason I am writing this blog right now is because a few months ago a woman contacted me after we had not seen each other or spoken for about six months. She texted me and said “Hey you. Am I still in your phone?” I answered “Absolutely!”
It turns out that when we were together before she had some things she needed to work on, which she told me about in an email. She and I got together a couple of months later, and we have been hanging out together non-stop ever since.
Sometimes in life we need to take inventory of where we’ve been in order to move forward. Keeping that in mind, think about how many men you’ve been interested in but have not pursued. Think too about men you’ve dated previously about whom you always wonder what would happen if you could get together with them one more time.
Once you identify these men, go ahead and lob in that email, lob in that text or lob in that phone call to them. You never know. He might have been thinking and wondering about you in the same way.
In life, somebody has to make the first move … and whoever makes the first move is the one who has complete control of her life. Do you want to keep waiting and wondering, or do you want to go and unlock the mystery which could lead you to a great romance and a great connection.
If you desire to meet the man of your dreams check out my new program.
Todays video is for all the women who want to learn about mens body language and what it means.
nice breakdown on the video D.
I have to admit, I have a ego problem sometimes, playing the hard to get guy. So I try to not be so closed, and be more inviting and open with women. It made a big difference when I realized those little things I was doing wrong.
Ok at work:
There are some guys that I know. Say like one in particular if he does not say hi to me. Look out when I catch up with him. Now when I am outside and the guy I know walks passed me and does not say hi. I will tell your not going to say hi fine keep walking and that will make him come over to me. But usually when I am sitting alone I will be aware of my surroundings and look around.
David
That was cute I would have looked anyway. And said hi even though I am talking to her. I can chew bubble gum and walk at the same time.
I recently met up with a girl I messaged on myspace almost half a year ago. We initially hit it off right, but she got into a relationship soon after and we sort of lost touch. 6 months later… she leaves me a comment and before we know it we have plans to hang out. Just goes to show that it never hurts to try and re-engage.
Hey David,
This is spot on, and goes for guys contacting girls as well. I met a girl a few months back at a party, txt’ed her the next day, and had some amazing phone conversations with her after our introductory txt’ing sessions. For some reason she quit responding to my txt and phone messages, and I thought she had written me off for some reason. I kept txt’ing her once each week to see how she was, and a month later she finally replied. I gave her a call, and she told me that she had just broken up with her boyfriend and has been having a hard time with it. I told her I understood, and we got together later in the week. We totally hit it off in person, and have been together ever since. Persistence is key (you need to know when to cut the rope though), and I totally think people worry too much about getting rejected.
Thanks for the killer blog,
- TR
I believe in giving a person a second chance to see what may happen. Who knows unless you try.
Everybody, I’m going back to visit my old college in NY, I transferred a year ago to a school in Florida to get out of the cold. Got any suggestions or ideas or things I can do?
David – Thanks for a timely video reminder about uninviting body language. Today, I was across town for an appointment and, when in that neighborhood, I stop at the local drive-in burger joint on the main drag. This blog must be sinking in because while I waited for my order, the guy behind me in line talked to me and then the woman and her teenage son behind him also talked to me! I didn’t think that I was acting any differently because this usually doesn’t happen. Maybe you can teach an old dog new tricks. Thanks.
Sweet… so does this give me an excuse to contact someone again and break the restraining order.
Just kidding.. I agree with re-contacting someone at a later date, and have done it myself. There does have to be a threshold where you cut your losses and move on though.
if all the girls follow these tips, than i won’t be so single anymore : )
I’ve always looked at people I meet as starting an on-going relationship for life, whether it’s friendship or romantic in nature.
Once you start looking at people as portals or open doors in your life, it’s only a matter of time before you come back to that same person just to check up on them.
Kheim
That is so true on how you look upon a person. I was told by another individual that a man can tell if the woman would be relationship material or not.
It works… Last Spring I went out with a man once and I liked him. I wanted to go out again but he didn’t ask and said he was busy right now. He sent occasional e-mails and called but he didn’t ask me out. So about a month later I told him that out of all the men I’d met recently HE was the one I hoped would ask me out again. Well, he did ask me out for the next Saturday… and we are still dating…
I was nervous about telling him because I didn’t want him to think I was chasing him. I just wanted to get to know him better. For about 2 months I continued to date others until HE ask me not to….
Dave your awesome!
Ok everyone it may have not been appropriate do to on this blog but I have one thing to say to those who do not want me to be apart of their click I will speak the name of my Lord anywhere I see fit. Until the day I hear David himself go away I will use this blog area until then.
Dan the Original
When I signed up for David Wygant to help me I did not see anywhere that you were a relationship counselor owning this website. Yes I do blog for I have a right to do so just like any of you and if you noticed I ask Kheim to email me so we would respect David’s blog area. If this was your site in the first place I would pass you by. You don’t pay my bills so why should I have to worry about you.
Or your pansy back up hoorah session.
may i add committee
Dan The Original
I did not know that you and Bertie was keeping count. But if you noticed that I have not blogged on this site very much but since you have brought the subject up. What gives you the right to say to me in not so many words you are not welcomed. No longer to blog here and watch what u say.
David
Did I sign up with you for you to help me or Dan The Original?
Yesterday while reading a book inside a bookstore, a caucasian lady whose also doing the same thing asked me the current time. I told her the time and started a conversation. She laugh to what I said and then continue reading. It seems that she was so shy to talk to me. I can’t continue the conversation because it was so quiet around the place and everybody were also reading a book. I am interested to know her but it was so frustrating to be in that situation.
Today, another lady approached me while we were waiting for a career seminar. I thought I knew her in the way she approached me. She is an Asian. It was fun to talk to her. She asked me about her appearance and the way she speaks English. Of course, I gave her an honest and nice comments. She said that I am “CUTE” two times while I was talking to her and I don’t know how to react on it. We had a long conversation before the seminar started. I am not physically attracted to her but I can considered her as an acquaintance if ever she called me.
Wow, so if she never made the move, she wouldn’t be your girlfriend. That’s amazing and definitely goes against the “He’s not into you” book.
Lionking said… “I can’t continue the conversation because it was so quiet around the place and everybody were also reading a book.”
That’s an excuse. She was interested, and if you were interested in her and had something to say you wouldn’t have even noticed the others around you. I’m not berating you, I just recognize the same excuses I’ve made to myself in the past for not acting when I should have. Who cares if others around were annoyed by your conversation, that’s all the more excuse to move it out of the book store to somewhere else. So which was it, were you not interested in her, or did you not know what to say?
I’m going to have to agree with Adam here.
We all make a lot of excuses why we can’t do one thing or another. It seems we do that even more when we want to talk to someone we find attractive.
How about we all stop looking for excuses to NOT do something, and instead, we look for opportunities to do the very things we want?
I think we’ll all be happier
Yes , you’re right Adam. I realized that it was my negative thoughts that prevent me to follow-up the conversation. I am too protective of myself and I didn’t take the risk.
Actually I have a lot to say to her at that moment. How it would not appear to the people around us that I am using the place (bookstore) as a hunting ground gave me a second thought to say what was in my mind. Better luck next time.
Right now I am talking to the Asian lady whom I’d met at the seminar yesterday.
I appreciate this post a lot.
A question – on another blog post (enjoy your blog, btw), you (David) said something like… a guy (or gal) will be decisive if he’s (she’s) into you. If there’s hesitation, then he isn’t. But this somewhat (realizing much in ‘relationship’ is contradictory) contradicts that, recognizing that people can be in different places but then at some point get to the same place.
whats the latest season?