Is it just me, or are you constantly awakening people at red lights?

There seems to be an epidemic going on in the world today. Whenever a light turns red, it seems like everybody does the same thing. Follow me here. Green light, which we learned when were 16 years old learning how to drive, means what? Go.

Yellow light means speed up as fast as you can to try to save 40 seconds from sitting at a stop light and hopefully make it through the light without crashing into anybody. Red light means stop. Sit at the light, look all around, listen to music, chill out, stare at the light, and wonder is this light going to turn green any time soon.

That used to be the mind game that we would play at lights. Oh, the good old days when we were able to just sit there, relax, wonder why this light takes so long. But now…

Now we love in a modern age, and every day in Los Angeles at a red light, I’ve got to honk the horn to wake somebody up. No, they’re not napping. No, they’re not day dreaming about becoming a famous actor and winning an Oscar. They’re on the phone. See, red light now means:

Stop at the light, check your e-mail in case an important e-mail came in, answer it while in traffic to show you’re really on top of things. Check for a text that came in. Of course, you probably heard the beep go off between the last red light and so – you’re dying to find out who texted you.

Or:

Check up on your imaginary friends on Facebook. You know all those people you check in on Facebook, maybe one of them posted a picture of the extra rolls of toilet paper they bought at Costco. Maybe they posted a quote from somebody famous. Whatever it might be, there’s always going to be somebody behind you like me that’s literally going to use the wake the f*ck up device, the horn.

I, in turn, will honk at you. You will be startled, most likely drop your phone or maybe misspell a text and hit send button. You’re then going to take the free hand, the one that’s not holding the phone, and you’re going to flash me the finger because it’s my fault that you didn’t get to finish your text before the light turned green. God forbid we should actually get out of the car and be productive.

What an amazing concept that would be to actually not sit in a car, not sit in a light, and not stare at our beautiful phones. Every day, somebody is being woken up at a stop-light because they are obsessed with their phone. How does that pertain to dating?

Well, these are conversations you can have during dull moments of a date. “You know the other day I was driving down the street, and had to honk my horn like three times to wake people up.”

Or, you can watch today’s video and realize that your texting habits may actually turn women off before you get close to them. You’d learn a little bit about driving, the iPhone, texting, and how women will get turned off.