I was recently sitting and talking with Will, whom you may know from some of my videos. Will is a young guy in his mid 20s. We started talking about where he is at in this stage of his life versus the stage I am at in my life.

He asked me about how I was when I was in my 20s. I told him my 20s were my adult adolescence. The more I thought about it, I realized the 20s decade of your life really is your adult adolescence.

Think about it. You get out of college at about 22 years of age, and you’re so geared up for life.

You really believe you know everything.  You’re grown up now.  After all, you have graduated from college. Your mom and dad congratulate you, and you think you’re ready for the big world.

You have dreams. You have aspirations. You think you know what you want for a career.

Then no matter who you were in college — whether you were great with women, a great athlete, or the smartest person in your class — you go into the real world you realize that you are at the bottom of the totem pole all over again. It’s like starting from scratch.

Your 20s is almost like starting high school all over again, except this time you are playing for keeps. In your career, you are playing for keeps. You start to think about work in a totally different way.

You start thinking about relationships differently. You will see members of the opposite sex differently, thinking “Wow, I could meet the person I may want to marry one day.”  

Your mindset is really different. You quickly figure out that you have a lot to learn in your 20s.

You get your ass kicked throughout your 20s. You really do.

You get your ass kicked in your career. You have to learn to deal with people who are a lot smarter than you — people who have been around the block, and people who know the game and know how to play it very well.

You learn a lot in your social life as well. You learn, as a guy in your young 20s, that a lot of 22 year old women want to date guys who are in their mid-20s. So you are the young guy once again. You don’t want to date college girls anymore, because they are too young for you.

So this time in your 20s is really a time to learn. It is a time to get introspective.

Your moods change too in your 20s. That is why you may tend to get a little more depressed at times and more introspective.

That is something I particularly remember about my 20s. I remember it being okay to just think and be introspective.

Don’t beat yourself up.  Don’t be hard on yourself. Understand that you’re going to be fine. You’re going to have an amazing, kick ass, unbelievable life.

Work hard, but relax when you need to do so. Go out there and meet people, and learn from the experiences. Date multiple women. Talk to lots of women. Figure out who you are through your interactions with other people and with yourself.

Your adult adolescence in your 20s is far greater than your teenage adolescence because you are not living with your parents anymore and you’ve got a little money in your pocket. I remember that period of having a little bit of money — even digging for change in my couch for money to go out on a Friday night — as some of my favorite times in my life.

Now that I have a great career, I live in a beautiful house and everything is fine, I look back at that time in my 20s very fondly. I remember how good that $2.00 beer tasted with those eight quarters I brought with me. I remember truly appreciating happy hours — and seeking out all the best food options (wings one happy hour and Mexican food the next).

Here is something I want everyone to do: Help the people who are in their 20s right now. I know when I look back on my 20s, that was an amazing and fun time of my life. It was carefree.

What I stressed out about in my 20s, as I look back upon it now, was ridiculous.
I was stressing about things that really didn’t mean much, but at the time I thought meant everything.

I was going out there getting better with women, and was actually learning my career. I mean, come on, when I was 23 years old I never imagined I would be some master communicator who teaches people how to connect with the opposite sex.

I wanted to be a personality. I wanted to be an actor when I was 23. I didn’t know how to do it. I didn’t know why I wanted to do it. That is just what I wanted at that point in my life.

So, really, enjoy your adult adolescence because that time is magical. I have videos of myself when I was in my 20s, and I remember how much fun I was having.

I am an adult now with a great life, a great career, and a 401K. There was nothing better, though, than that $450.00 a month apartment I lived in at 167 West 80th Street in New York City and that time of my life. Everything at that time is an incredible memory.

It’s the “wow factor” of everything going on in your 20s that often causes people in their 20s stress. Realize, though, that the “wow factor” will become the stuff of some great memories for you as you get older. So enjoy it!