Leave Your Personal Stuff Behind
July 13, 2010 
11 Comments
Let’s talk about crap. No, I’m not talking about the crap you leave in the toilet bowl each morning, and I’m not trying to be crude or disgusting. I want to talk about a different kind of crap — your personal crap.
The taxes that are due. Your father with whom you aren’t getting along. The bad fight you had the night before with your roommate. Your boss being mean to you. All of your personal crap.
We all have personal crap, but you need to leave all of that behind when you are out and about each day. The reason is that although everyone has personal crap going on in their life, you don’t want to be exuding that bad energy when you walk around trying to meet people.
You don’t want to say to someone in response to them asking how you are doing, “Crappy. My boss yelled at me today” or “I’m a doctor and I had the worst patient today in my office. I’m miserable. Do you mind if I vent and tell you all about my personal crap?”
When you go out, picture yourself on a giant stage. On that stage are four people you’ve wanted to meet your entire life, and now is the moment you and they are going to get together.
So you want to leave a positive impression of you. You can do that by being positive when you talk to them, of you can talk about your personal crap until you turn them all off.
As a matter of fact, I’ve had some heavy-duty personal crap I’ve been going through in my own life which I could have been venting about to all of you for weeks now. I could have been telling you how annoyed I am about certain things, and how I have to deal with all of it.
Do you guys really want to hear about that? If all I did in the blog every day was talk about my own personal crap, you would get tired of it pretty fast. You want to hear about the great things.
So does everyone else. So leave you personal crap behind.
I agree with the content of this article. I believe that its hard to leave your personal crap behind 100% when dealing with people because we all are humans and its our personal crap that connect US all and bring common interest together at the round table so to speak.
Very good advice David, that’s very annoying when someone walks to you and starts talking about personal crap. It’s the most important thing to leave a positive first impression.
I can’t stand personal crap and I don’t give anyone my own personal crap because no one wants to hear it..I don’t call my mother cause it’s the same thing over and over each time…She tells me all about her problems then tells me she has to go and hangs up…I don’t even bother anymore
how about when it’s the significant other that talks personal crap? Constant complaints about their day yet you are ‘obligated’ to listen and sympathize because you’re in a serious relationship with them…. Same with when he talks to my friends when they ask him how he’s doing. What do you do then? I am in that situation. Negativity just kills the mood.
how about when it’s the significant other that talks personal crap? Constant complaints about their day yet you are ‘obligated’ to listen and sympathize because you’re in a serious relationship with them…. Same with when he talks to my friends when they ask him how he’s doing. What do you do then? I am in that situation. Negativity just kills the mood.
Telling others your personal crap, gives the impression that you have a fucked up life. NOT attractive.
I know a friend who always has problems with her parents. She never tells me about it, because she does not want to bother me with it. I think she made a good choice.
Better to be leaders of our lives than victims of it.
Wow guys. I do this all the time with my friends!! Now I see how that can be really annoying!!
Thank dear David isa very good advice.
I like the idea of being on a stage and leaving our personal stuff behind.
Re a mum or a significant other, we do need to be there to listen when they vent (to a certain extent). Negativity is not good, however losing that communication with loved ones is even worse – it will lead to the breakdown of that relationship.
Why not encourage others if they are angry to feel it – go for a workout! or if they are sad, hold them then do something fun. Or just listen even for ten minutes.
Healing is in the expression of the feeling… then move on to the good stuff. This builds relationships with significant others.
For the rest of the world – yes, for sure, be happy and carefree!!
Yep, this is a, I would say, common sense to give this advice. Sometimes you will be eager to talk a bit too much and show the weaknesses that won’t hurt that much, but leave everything, don’t talk and have a good date.
Good article.
Guys want to hear the good things even about them to make them feel good. I remember i met this guy on a website who wanted me to tell him how good he was of a chatter. That was way too much