I write all the time about ways to go out and meet someone. I am always talking about breaking through fears, getting over rejection and how to present yourself confidently in every situation. Why do I discuss all this, and why are these all things about which you want to learn?
We talk and learn about all this because we want to meet someone who absolutely blows us away. The real reason why we spend so much time and energy working on ourselves and our inner confidence is so we can learn how to love ourselves (by understanding who we truly are and what we’re truly all about).
We do this so that one day all of a sudden out of left field we will meet someone who absolutely captivates our mind. We don’t do all this work on ourselves so we can remain alone. The whole reason we do all this is so we can meet the most amazing person we’ve ever met.
We spend such a considerable amount of time getting to know ourselves so that we can appreciate when magic happens with a most amazing person, and so we will go with it and embrace it.
This most amazing person is someone about whom we spend entire days thinking. We are anxious for each phone conversation with them. We eagerly await every text message from them.
You know what the most amazing feeling is that you can experience? It is the smile you have on your face every single time you learn something new about someone. It is equally amazing to find someone with whom you easily stay present and on the same page.
I may be using the word “amazing” too much, but when you meet someone who just blows you away it is really difficult to accurately describe in words the emotions that creates inside of you. Those emotions – that warmth you feel inside – are a combination of so many things.
It’s the anticipation of seeing that person again. It’s waking up in the morning with a smile on your face as that person pops into your mind.
It could be remembering that certain little thing they said to you that day (or even days before that). It might be remembering a lingering kiss you shared with them – a kiss you feel like you can still taste on your lips hours or even days after the kiss has ended.
It doesn’t matter what the specific things are that engender this feeling within you. There is no doubt, though, that we all desire to experience this kind of feeling.
That kind of feeling is created when every moment you are getting to know someone becomes a special moment for you. You eagerly await each phone conversation, because every new thing you learn about that person becomes one more reason why you like them and makes you like them even more.
As incredible as it feels to experience this depth of emotion about someone, it is perhaps an even better one to wake up in the morning knowing this person is out there thinking you are equally as fascinating, and amazing. That person also waits eagerly for each phone conversation with you. That person also wakes up smiling as you pop into their head. That person feels those same intense emotions inside themself about you.
Life is about experiencing this kind of magic. Most of us don’t spend enough time experiencing this kind of magic (and some miss experiencing it all together) because we are so afraid of experiencing it. I’ve written about this in a few other blogs.
Think about this. What is the point of doing all this work on ourselves unless we are willing to share ourselves with someone else? Sharing your thoughts, feelings and emotions with another person is truly the greatest high you can experience.
There is no greater feeling. There is no drug or type of alcohol that produces a high as intense and incredible as being truly emotionally, physically and spiritually connected with someone.
When is the last time you kissed someone and that kiss was so intoxicating that you were lost in that moment long after the kiss ended? Even after you said goodnight and parted company with that person, you craved and wanted more of every part of them.
You craved and wanted to hear more of their voice.
You craved and wanted to feel more of their lips.
You craved and wanted to touch them more, and to feel more of their touch on your skin.
When was the last time you experienced raw passion and lust? When was the last time you drove someone home after a soul shattering kiss and literally felt drunk, so much so that you worried that if a cop pulled you over you would be convicted of DUK (driving under the influence of kissing)? This DUK feeling is precisely how you want to feel when you’re with someone.
How about the person you wish you were still talking to even after you’ve just returned from taking them home? Every time you hang up from talking on the phone to that person you wish you could immediately call them again. You constantly want more of that person and feel like you could never get enough of them.
What about the person with whom you have sex for the first time and it is so natural that you never think about it being your first time togethe? As we all know, the first time you have sex with someone it rarely feels exactly right because you don’t know their body well enough yet and you think about it a little too much.
So if you meet someone and the very first time you have sex with them it feels so completely natural and like you already have learned each other’s bodies, that is what makes you feel as though you are meant to be with that person. You feel like your bodies communicate perfectly with each other without either of you having to speak.
Your bodies communicate with each other so deeply and intensely that you can still feel their energy inside you all throughout the next day. You anxiously anticipate the next time you will have sex with them because deep in your soul you know your connection with them will be better, more intense and more amazing.
We spend our lives working on ourselves so we can experience these kind of deep and intense emotions. We do it so we can feel that drunk-like intoxicating soul connection when you have sex.
We do it so we can feel comfort and a true sense of peace. That’s the best way to describe how it feels when you truly make love to somebody – it’s a sensation of peace. You completely stop thinking and solely are connecting with that person. Your bodies just move. You get lost in the touches, the kisses and the entire experience. If you think about it, that is what we are looking for in the best sexual connections: the ability to become totally and effortlessly lost in each other.
Life has its ups and its downs, so why not search for someone with whom you share this kind of intense emotional, physical and spiritual connection? A connection that has you excited for every phone conversation, every kiss, every little touch – so much so that you feel you can never absorb enough of that person.
Imagine falling asleep every night with the last thoughts in your mind being a yearning for more and more of every part of someone. Imagine wanting to know more about them, wanting to taste more of them, wanting to devour every word they say, and wanting to know their every thought and emotion. This is what magic feels like, what life is truly all about, and what we all should aspire to find.
“This most amazing person is someone about whom we spend entire days thinking. We are anxious for each phone conversation with them. We eagerly await every text message from them”
how do you know when this is not just part of a crush on someone?
Joe
You want a crush to last forever.
That is the magic of love.
Sounds like David’s crushing on someone
Wow, I thought I’d been on love before, but it feel quite like what you’ve described here…makes me feel a little better about our break up. Maybe destiny wouldn’t allow me to settle.
>>>>>>>>>You want a crush to last forever.
We sure all do but it rarely happens in real life.
I am beginning to think you send subliminal messages about your dates through this blog:-)
hmmm……….. interesting, i haven’t really feel so strong about anyone in my life!
when i thought i felt like this in high school, i realized it was an infatuation,
hopefully, i feel like that one day…
Rey
You do have that feeling for someone,
When you look at Daphne your eyes lite up and you protect her like she is yours!!
It has to start somewhere.
You also love the statue of co caa
Dan
Maybe i am sharing with you what i am going through and maybe i am just letting you know that after all this work i have done that this is not only possible….
but something that everyone can experience!!
Tammi
Never ever settle!!!!
This is why i write this so people can see what can happen to them in life.
Rey
One last thing you can always fall in love with Special K:)
This blog is so incredible because if you’ve ever glimpsed this kind of feeling – or really have yet to feel it at all – it is the kind of inspiration that makes you believe that finding it is possible.
If this doesn’t make you want to take the self-improvement journey that David teaches, I don’t know what would …
Thanks David for giving all of us a glimpse of the ultimate goal …
This is exactly what i ultimately want. I’ve only felt it a few times in life, but its described very well here.
David you just took the word deep to another depth and level. Awesome blog today
David some of us feel that we have to settle ….No matter what I do, what I read, what I try, how well I dress or groom, what product I purchase, what bootcamps I have taken I just do not get anywhere….so when I finally find some woman who does finally pay attention and maybe laughs at my jokes and doesn’t say the usual “got lost”, “your not my type”, “boyfriend”….you kind of feel good…dating is brutal and woman are on the whole cold and unfriendly – its not fun at all….sorry but thats just my story
Nice post. Nicer still coming from a man.
I sure do miss that feeling, described here so well (pseudo version though it was). Waiting good. Settling bad.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>that after all this work i have done that this is not only possible….
but something that everyone can experience!!
Of course everyone can experience but how long does it last????? It is the rare breed of human species that keeps this going for decades or even for life! What was the longest that lasted with you? Or am I missing something here?
Or maybe we can ask Joe the plumber, lol
Ok – it does sound like a crush….
Let me ask this… Do you feel this way right when you meet this person? Or does it develop over time?
Like if you don’t really get to talk to someone and then you finally get to talk to them and they just leave you wanting more…does that count?
I guess I am wondering if it is different for everyone in how you meet this person.
In your situation, David, did you feel this way from the moment you laid eyes on her? Spoke to her? Took her out on a date? Was it instantaneous or did it develop over a time period?
And then when you do meet this person, you just explore it? What do you do when you feel scared?
What about if the time isn’t right? Or is there not such a thing?
I just found your blog…insightful, intoxicating, and real truth to the matter. I have been blessed with feeling this, but alas, sometimes it still does not lead to lasting love…
One truly should not settle ever…for anything less than this.
Only someone who has experienced this bliss can comprehend and understand…it surpasses all previous understanding…
Movies and books can sometimes portray this…that is why these movies sell so well…this IS what people are looking for.
Well emoted thought and pen to paper for an etheral and mostly untouchable (but oh so touchable!) subject. Sincere thanks…
The girl that I am interested in right now I met a couple of years ago when she came into my old job at a bank.
Strangely enough after quitting this job, I ended up working with her, and now we are both single, whereas we were both in long term relationships.
Every time I see her she takes my breath away, for two years now. Luckily she isn’t constantly making dramatic entrances, or I might be dead.
There have been a few instances where we have gone out, just the two of us to dinner, lunch, movie etc. The entire time is filled with incredible laughter and smiles, she has so many interesting things to say. I don’t even know if these are to be considered dates or not, but what is the difference between a date, and just hanging out as friends?
So confused, maybe this is why I have been single for so long.
Yeah, David, I share Taras’ curiosity about whether you are crushing on someone …
and I feel inspired by your vision
Boy wouldn’t it be cool for me to spill the beans!!
But some things are better left unsaid!!
lol
Na na na na NAAAA na… I know the truth behind David’s blog but I’m not gonna tell.
That feeling is always amazing. This is why we learn to grow and improve on ourselves… so that we are ready to truly open up and share the passion and connection with a special someone.
I know my relationship is not as intense as David’s right now… but it feels soooo good and easy. It’s intense in a different way… but that might be b/c I’m much younger than David.
David, when are we doing a double date? LOL
Very inspiring blog today david, so what if davids “crushing” thats his private life same as it is for everyone else.
I cant wait to get out there and meet some women know david
Ryan
Kurt,
What you believe is true in your life, your mind looks for proof that what you believe is real.
If you believe dating is harsh, cold and hard, all your dates will seem like that. It’s true that sometimes, it can get difficult but it’s not true.
Dating IS easy… the question is: what are you REALLY doing?
Where are you meeting these women? What kind of things you are talking with these women? If you’ve taken a lot of bootcamps, remember that bootcamps only teach you PICKUP.
Dating is not always a pickup. It’s the start of a relationship… whether friends or lovers. Pickup’s techniques are geared to get you laid. There’s nothing wrong with that… but there’s a few things you’d have to do different if you really want to be successful with women on a genuine level.
You can’t objectify women through pickup by ONLY wanting to get laid with them. There’s a better path out there.
Are you really understanding what that path is?
How long are you planning to do your bootcamps preferbly for david, id love to come down and see you sometime in the future. Im from the uk so id have to fly to you
David, as per usual, you have summed up, in a brilliant and fabulous fashion, everything that I have ever ‘believed in’, and certainly craved, romantically. However, as of late, I haven’t really believed in it ‘logistically’, as I used to. As I have been feeling very disconnected from the dating scene lately, I still crave and desire intimacy, and frankly, sex, however, one night stands just will not cut it for me. Where do i go from here?
David, here’s something I feel like I have to share…
I had this relationship before and we were totally inlove with each other. True love is so much way more than amazing, it’s so unexplainable that there is no such word how to describe it. The sex for some reason is way more satisfying when you both love each other, because for one fact, just being with that person and being able to feel their touch, fills us with such overwhelming joy and contentment. You never get tired of that person, and every single day you spend being with them would seem like that moment when you both fell inlove.
We broke up because it was my fault. It was a long-distance relationship, and we only got to see each other every 2months. I cheated on him, I know it was stupid for me to take this man for granted. But there were reasons, and did understood that he had the right to get angry at me. I felt so guilty, I was so scared, that after 2weeks I couldn’t keep it anymore from him and finally had the courage to tell him. I didn’t mean to do it and I knew I had to make things right. No matter how i tried, no matter how I begged, he just couldn’t accept me anymore and look at me the same way how he did before. Of course it broke my heart too, I was also shattered. To make my story short, he broke up with me after a month. And 2 hours after, he begged me to come back to him because he just can’t face the fact of losing me. It really isn’t easy in situations like this. I knew I could have just said yes and have him again in my life, but I thought hard about it and realized that he wanted to get back to me because his will was saying yes, but his heart wasn’t really into me anymore. I had to give it space, things just weren’t the same anymore and I figured we both needed to move on and heal our own selves first before trying to rebuild a relationship again. Oh hell it took me 2 years to totally get over him, to totally get over the pain.
I learned that we will never know how it feels till we actually get to experience it ourselves. I used to think that those people who are taking so much time in trying to get over their ex, is just totally ridiculous. I used to wonder why on earth do those people get so emotional about it. And time came that I had to face it myself, that was when I totally understoood how it must have been so hard for them too, how broken they felt too. You know i didn’t mean to cheat on him, but hey, things happened. I learned my mistake, and I learned the hard way to be able to understand those people I used to judge about it.
I realized that if I was able to get through it and remained strong inspite of feeling totally shattered deep inside, I guess I could probably overcome anything, right? I believed that there was a purpose why that experience had to be a part of my past. It prepared me for the worst, it taught me how to stay strong no matter what, it helped me in becoming a better person and be ready for the next relationships to come and also be totally ready and fit for my future partner. One more thing, it also gave me ideas on what to share to others that I’d get to encounter that are battling the same situation.
We all have to get through it in order to understand more. Reading about it from books and learning about what it seems like from books, is just not enough. You have to be in their shoes and see how would you have dealt with it.
I think this is what separates you David from any other dating experts I have heard and read about anywhere else. Because if you didn’t go through all these things that you’re currently teaching to so many single people out there, your advices just wouldn’t make sense and probably won’t even work.
Keep doing your thing, because you have the gift of changing people’s dating life and way of thinking.
Thanks David for this meaningful blog post. Looking forward again for the next one.
“When is the last time you kissed someone and that kiss was so intoxicating that you were lost in that moment long after the kiss ended? Even after you said goodnight and parted company with that person, you craved and wanted more of every part of them.
You craved and wanted to hear more of their voice.
You craved and wanted to feel more of their lips.
You craved and wanted to touch them more, and to feel more of their touch on your skin.”
- My answer to all of the above is, far too long ago. Revababy your story hit a chord with me as i went through a similar experience. I was in a relationship with the perfect girl and we had such an intense connection, she was marriage material. Unfortunately, i got lazy, and took her for granted. She ended the relationship but i was the one that drove her to it. I was young and immature, didn’t realise what i had. So for the past 6 years, yes, 6 years my life has been more or less a misery. I’ve had other relationships and flings, but nothing that has come even minutely close to what i had with this girl. I feel as though i’ve wasted half a decade of prime years of my life, grieving. Friends and family told me long ago to forget her, move on, plenty of fish in the sea etc… None of it helped. So i learned to put up the mask, hiding my pain away from everybody. Hey who wants to be around a mopey depressed person? But even though i wear the mask the pain never goes away. I love reading these blogs and using David’s advice as tools to
try to develop a positive frame of mind, maitain hope that someone else just as special will come along. And for the most part it has been a great help. But too many times have i been set up and then disappointed. I’m tired of being alone, i won’t settle for anything less than what i had, but its so damn hard to find! Love can be wonderful, but its also a very dangerous thing. It can wreck your life. I just hope and pray that i do meet someone who inspires all the feelings and emotions that i have experienced in the past, but my patience and stamina is waning. It really gets me down sometimes, for weeks on end. Sorry for such a long post.
What David describes in this blog is in no way a simple “crush ” . What he is talking about is L O V E baby!
it is not merely a drug, it is THE DRUG ! and once you have a taste nothing else come close to that feeling.
Thank-you David , your words describe the whole experience so wonderfully .
For those of you who have yet to enjoy this kind of magic, it is worth every ounce of energy you expend to attain it.
BTW I just recieved one of those much anticipated texts ,from my lover
ive never felt this way about anyone. and i find everyone invaluably interesting. what do you do about this paradox.
Awww man you guys! :p
Sam..
It took me 2 years to get over him and get over the pain I had to face, but of course it takes time for the feelings to vanish. There will always be feelings left, somewhere within us. We’d still get jealous to see them with someone, and would still silently hope that maybe we’ll still end up with that person. In my case, all in all it took me 4 years to get over him, get over the pain, and forget the feelings I had (which was only last year 2007). I was finally able to let go of every single feeling I had. That is one thing that stays longer than any other element that we try to get over with from an ex, because we built it with them, we sacrificed it for them, we kept pouring water in it till it got stronger and stronger and more solid. In his case was the same too. Last year he finally met someone new who was 2 years younger than me (our gap is 4yrs), and she happens to be someone who had the same personality as me, and she treated him like how I did. Heck we even have the same birthday, lol. But at least he was able to get over me too.
So Sam just stay strong. The important thing right now is that you learned from your mistake, part of it would be realizing where you went wrong and what would you do the next time in order to prevent it. There is no such perfect relationship, because it takes two to form it, it takes two to make it work, it takes two to grow it, and it takes two to to deposit effort to solidify it. It’s not just you and what you want and what you think, but it’s sharing it with the other person. A give and take. You just have to do the best you can, and learn from the points where you are weak at.
Well, as what my married and single-parent friends said, we should enjoy life while we still get the chance to do so before getting married, especially before having kids. So right now, we just gotta have fun, take ourselves out and give ourselves a treat. Go dating if we can. We should have fun but know our limits too of course. Let’s love ourselves first and think in a positive way. Let’s live our life and make our past as a shaper of who we are as individuals right now.
Not even George Constanza can inspire you THIS much.
I totally agree. this is what we want overall. we dont want alot of numbers, one-night stands, or numerous sexual partners.
we just want that one person who can accompany us and make our life meaningful, and which can drive our purpose, fuel our passions, and energize us.
Thats what I want. I don’t want to sleep with numerous women, if its not going to help me get there.
Jeff
You are 100% correct not a crush…….but still a crush.
You can have both when you fully understand the depth of yourself and how your emotions work.
More to come on this topic really soon
Sam
Keep the faith and love yourself.
You will meet someone when you are able to fully love who you are.
Great post and enjoyed reading your thoughts!!!
Reva
One question.
Why did you cheat on this person?
Go deeper with the reasons please.
This will be very interesting.
Shama
Were are you at right now?
Tell me more
Ryan
I do one bootcamp a month.
Come on down!!!
Khiem
You do no the truth behind what is happening in my life:)
Thanks for not blowing my cover!!!
Kurt
May i ask whose bootcamps you took?
That may be part of the problem.
Kurt..
It’s totally not true that women are on the whole cold and unfriendly. Some women’s personalities are naturally cold and unfriendly, to them it’s normal. Some act that way depends on their current situation, some are just too nice and very accomodating, and some react that way depends on other people’s approach to them. I do think it was either because on how you approached them, or your mind was set to be responded by women that way. You know when you think negatively, you tend to get brainwashed by your thoughts. And since your negative thoughts may start to control you, you become somewhat determined that that’s what’s gonna happen to you everytime you approach women.
You should check out David’s videos, David’s products and David’s blogs. You will surely get straightforward answers and will learn a lot. Start thinking positively, and keep in mind that every woman differ in so many ways.
DAVID..
I was 18 that time, very confused and was also going through other difficult personal issues.
I was separated from my childhood male bestfriend that same semester during school. We were studying in a college that was a 5-hour drive from our own hometown, a private campus. His parents started betraying my parents, and at first it was fine for me and my bestfriend. And then his mom started talking shit about my brother, so my mom didn’t want me to talk to my bestfriend anymore. 2 weeks after which was a month before I cheated on my boyfriend, that was when my bestfriend’s dad suddenly came to school and took my bestfriend away from me and transferred him to another school that is very far from me. I only had 10minutes to see him for the last time before they left. What was more devastating is that my bestfriend himself chose to do what his parents wanted him to do, to stop the communication also. You know it was like choose between family or friends. So yeah, I wasn’t allowed to talk to him in person, I couldn’t at least take a glimpse of him anymore since he was taken away without being warned first, and I couldn’t even reach him anymore by phone or email. It really broke me into pieces, it felt like life wasn’t that worth it to embrace anymore.
Good thing I still had my female bestfriend around. If not for her, I wouln’t have survived it. It did affected my studies, It affected my eating appetite (heck I lost about 25-30lbs in a month), I was trying to rebuild myself, and my boyfriend wasn’t around that whole time I was struggling. That is why I was mistakenly led to seek short companionship from someone else, thinking that it might be what I have been looking for to finally relieve myself from my own dilemma. But it didn’t help. I thought of not telling my boyfriend about it, but as days went, it was killing me more inside. At least I admitted to him and did what I could to make our relationship go normal right? past is past. I have moved on from everything.
I just came across this blog, it is very beautiful. I dream about the moment I meet this person. I have been dreaming about it for years. I know I will meet him. I just can’t settle for less!!
Revababy
You are right it does take a hell of a lot to just let go of the feelings you have for a person like that. I find it so hard to comprehend how you can be that close to someone, share your secrets and inner most feelings, your bodies, your time, practically everything you have with this person, then one day it all just counts for nothing and they leave. I understand that people fall in AND out of love, but if you still love them when its all over it can be a doomsday feeling that lasts for a very long time.
Its not all bad though, the one big lesson she did teach me which may sound obvious to many people is that the people in your life ARE your life. She taught me to value the people you love above physical possessions or selfish wants and desires. I guess i was quite immature not to be aware of this previously, but i’m definitely up to speed now. So whenever something happens within my current relationships or friendships, i just step back and evaluate the big picture; is this argument/difference/whatever worth losing this person? invariably the answer is no and i make the decision to maintain my relationship. Without great people in our lives we really have nothing. They are the ones that make us get up in the morning and have a zest for life. It’s important to value yourself too, but sharing life with loved ones is really what it’s all about.
David
Thanks I am keeping my chin up, positivity is the way forward. I just have my down times. But picking myself up is becoming easier. And that really is in no small part due to your website, videos and blogs. The messages you give everybody really are life changing and inspiring. You probably don’t even realise how much you have helped people you’ve never met, but i thank you for the work you do and the hope you bring people.
I only have one word to say.
Amen.
Ok lets make it a few more.
3 years working on myself + 4 and a half day’s of full immersion in London = a fire in the belly that’s like a coal mine fire that burns for thousands of years and never go’s out.
David, I was actually going to write a post about that “intoxicating kiss” you mentioned earlier.
Last night, I went out with a woman. And the connection we made was incredible and we were clearly just having so much fun.
When we finally kissed, it was something that I have not felt in such a long time. I was so lost in the moment that I almost forgot where we were and when the kiss was over, we both had that “sigh” that we all know and love.
When we kissed again, it was the same thing. Incredible. The taste of the kiss lingered and I cherished every moment and it was one of those kisses I will not forget for a long time.
We all strive to have these stories to tell. This time, two years ago, I would never have a story like this to tell. But with all the work, reading and experience I have put myself through, isn’t it worth it?
And even when you think you get there…you’ll want more.
I know I do.
We all want more, always striving to improve. I always put such importance on age when I was looking for a man, looking for someone young, and ambitious. I recently found what I was looking for, but to my surprise it as in the form of man 18 years my age. I’m 21, and I am throwing all my past judgements, and thoughts aside. I think I’m in love, for the first time in my life, and no he doesn’t father me. I do not
see the father image in him at all. He’s tall, sexy, ambitious, and intelligent. I had all kinds of judgements by others thrown at me, telling me he’s a skirt chaser. Doesn’t seem so to me, when I ask him why he’s never married, he told me that he hadn’t found the right woman. Thinkin I may be it. I know I’m young, but I have a head on my shoulders, and I know what I want. I want magic everytime I’m in someones arms, I want him to be strong, confident, and as loving as I am. I have that with him. He makes me feel as though I am the only woman in the room when we are together.
Family and friends are both giving me an extremely hard time over this, but I’m standing firm that this is good for me. Lasting love is something that we all strive for, and I’m not passing up this opportunity. I forgot to mention, he’s extremely good in bed, not akward like younger men. Love his experience.
Omg, i forgot to include why I was sharing all of this, ( and yes I am blonde) I wanted to tell all you guys to expand your horizons a bit. No he may not have been what I was looking for, but he completes me. Never would have expected it, but very pleasantly surprised. Go for it.
Becky, that is a great example. Like David said,
“Life is about experiencing this kind of magic.”
I’m happy for you and I hope things work out. Listening to your heart and going through these things by yourself are the only ways to truly learn your purpose in life, what you really want and how you are going to go after the goals you set in life.