How Good Are You With Lines?
December 22, 2009 
9 Comments
Man, I tell ya . . . traveling during the holidays is just oh so much fun. Yesterday I got to travel on Delta, the airlines which doesn’t like to give you a seat assignment ahead of time. It likes to “assign it at the airport.”
Why not just call yourself Southwest then? I mean, the flight was booked weeks ago and I can’t pick a seat? What a waste of time!
Not to mention, can people be any grumpier? I mean, it’s supposed to be the holiday time and yet I had the nastiest women sitting next to me on the plane.
They spent an hour complaining about Christmas shopping and the long lines. You all know the lines (no, I’m not talking to you PUA guys), the ones where you’re waiting to pay for your items? Those lines are actually one of the best ways to meet people.
Looking at those two women on the plane – no engagement rings on their fingers and bitching and complaining nonstop — I couldn’t imagine them grasping the concept of flirting while waiting in a line. Not to mention, that I bet those women were the same type of person who, when they get to the front of a line, go to pay with a check and haven’t even started to fill it in ahead of time.
Christmas time is one of the best times to talk to people in line. You can say, “Wow, what a great sweater!” or “Soap on a rope. Wow, I used to give that to my Dad!” If I had been in line with one of these women from the plane, however, I would have said something more like, “Do you always complain in line?”
When I was single, I’d always go people shopping around the holidays. I’d have no bags, go into a store and turn into a customer service rep. I’d say things like, “You’re really getting that sweater for your uncle Ted? I don’t think he’ll like it…”
My favorite question while waiting in line used to be, “If you could buy anything in this store, what would it be?” The answer to this question gives you great insight into someone’s personality.
It is also such a great open-ended question. Plus, it gives you the opportunity to ask people why they are buying the Zales heart-shaped pendant with the microscopic sized diamond chips when they could have gotten a sold 14K gold ring.
Anyway, have fun out there in the lines when you’re shopping. Oh, and just one last thing about holiday traveling.
I was in the security line listening to someone talk about how many planes they have to take to go from Los Angeles to Baltimore — 3 connections! I wondered how much they paid for the privilege of adding six hours to their trip and getting to schlep their gifts onto three different planes.
So I turned to that person and said, “Are you Santa Claus? Because it sounds like you have way too many rooftops to get to before you get to Baltimore.” They said, “The ticket was cheap.” I said, “How much?” They said they paid $265.00.” I didn’t want to tell them that I paid $260.00 for a direct flight on which I didn’t have to land on any rooftops.
For all of you who are willing to pay $10.00 less to add five hours to your trip, I have a question for you. Is your time only worth $10.00?
Do you think Southwest is your only flying alternative? It’s called marketing folks. Bags fly free? Great . . . but you also fly six hours longer.
whenever i hear people bitching and complaining about something it makes me wanna turn the other way….if i wanted to hear pure near neagtive stuff then ill watch the local news channels
Speaking of lines, I used one of yours, David. I was at a club in Vegas and used the “forget my name and you buy me a drink game”. Every time she saw me, we stopped and talked. We were making out by the 3rd time we encountered. Great stuff!
I got her number too, but as I’m sure many don’t know, getting a phone number rarely means success at the next step. We’ll see how this goes. Otherwise, on to the next!
My time IS worth $10, and I’m ashamed of you for degrading frugality. Though, one should expect no differently from a pick-up artist. So, I admit that the fault with this comment really lies with me. Sorry. Keep blogging away or whatever you do now that you’re not “single.” Say, what are you? “Double”? Surely, you’re at least “triple” by now…
Andy
You have no idea who I am and it shows in your post.
A pick up artist I am not.
I dont teach men how to prey on women and pick them up with lines so you are obviously someone who does not have a clue to who I am,
I am in a relationship…getting married and respect women.
I rarely respond to posts that come from left field but your entire post made no sense and you have this angry vibe about you.
I was not degrading frugality I was just making a much deeper point that you clearly missed.
Whats your issue with yourself? You admit that the fault with this comment lies with you.
So instead of some really bad humor at the end why don’t you get deeper and see what this really bothered you?
Its time you looked in the mirror and asked yourself why did what i wrote bother you so much?
Hey Andy…
Do a search through David’s blogs for the term “pickup” and you will see how many times he writes about how much he dislikes it!
Also, I agree with David …. you sound like your real issue is with yourself…
Andy – you are an idiot.
Or if you’re not an idiot, you are either math challenged or are used to working for about $2/hr.
The author was making reference to the costs for airline tickets and associated flying times. He was pointing out that for an extra $5 ($265 vs $260), the Santa Claus traveler could have avoided the layovers, flown direct and saved five hours.
You on the other hand, claimed you would rather save the $10 and spend the extra five hours of your life on the plane. Please! Are you a turnip? Does your life mean that little to you? Give up two couple cups of coffee and you just five hours of your life back.
So I put it to you, are you:
1 – An idiot (i.e. turnip)
2 – Math challenged (can’t do the calculations)
3 – Currently work for ~$2/hr?
I suspect all three.
-Van
PS The author also simplified the comparison by the way. With three connections, that’s a huge amount of variance thrown into the debate. That’s three extra planes, any issues with any of them, such that any could be delayed due to weather, equipment failure, overbooking etc…. The ripple effect of missing the 1st connection could add many hours, even days on top of the travel time. The extra $5 paid to avoid connections is nothing! Compare a direct flight vs a flight with 3 connections, any seasoned traveler would be more than willing to pay a hefty premium to avoid those variables and the potential to be thrown into “air travel hell” a missed connection brings with it. But you didn’t consider this did you for the worth of your $10? But then again, turnips are not the most accomplished travelers are they…
This has gotten a little outta hand, like David said, we all need to look into ourselves, plus it seems as though some were quick to read the post and blurt out what was on their mind. Take a second, reread it and it may make a little more sense. Regardless, the comments here prove that David was correct in saying many are grumpy this time of year; Get the love back, go out, meet people, and have fun with the rest of this year, and for everyday after for that matter.
~Happy Christmas everyone,
Tristan
HAHA i love this topic on pick up lines.
although for some reason i believe they never work, unless you exploit the human’s subconscience to give yourself an.. unfair advantage 
Which, coincidentally, is what i blog about 