Enliven your routine
January 28, 2009 
18 Comments
Just a quick blog today. Some thing that all of you should be doing everyday….wait it is something you all day everyday!!
What is something that we are doing all of the time in life? We’re running errands.
We’re always running errands. We’re getting our car washed, we’re getting gas, we’re going to the supermarket to buy groceries, we’re going to the art store to have a picture framed, we’re on our way to the dry cleaners. Whatever it is…we are always running errands.
So, think about this: you’re always running errands, and I’m always running errands, everyone is always running errands – that must be a great place to meet people!
Even better, you have something that you can talk to people about at any time in any place. You’ve probably been running errands at the same places for years.
Look at running errands as something fun to do. Walk into a place and take over. Create a party in the place you are in. It’s no longer about just buying a pair of sneakers – you’re going out to have fun and talk with other people (and find some new kicks!)
Begin to look at things in a different way. Think about where people are. People are where you are! You have to realize this and take advantage of these places. These are the places where things start to become interesting. Take advantage of it!
Aha
I am the first one to blog today…god
At one time I use to sing to myself on the road again when will I make it home again. I am usually on the go. But today I have slowed down. When I go out on errands I see people I know and say hi to them some I talk to.
Love to watch people walk on the beach..All shapes and sizes some old some young. My favorite though is watching those walking hand in hand in their 60+ in small bikini’s and speedos..we have several of them where I live and it is so beautiful to see people still after such a long life enjoying holding hands, give a warm kiss a gentle touch on each others body regardless of how they physically look like. just like frisky young couples.. Often you hear someone giggle in disgust..I feel sorry for them they just missed out of one of the beautiful moments in life.
These people enliven my moment on the beach, their not giving in to what people might expect them to wear or do, is what it’s all about….
My husband was always like did not matter who or where we were he would always make people smile and enliven this moment in life for the ones around him.
Little thing as to drive through a tollbooth he would turn into a great smile on the tollpersons face even if they first had a sour face on.
Never ceased to impress me how in any restaurant he would always within few minutes have waiter/waitress give their inner thoughts to him, always bring a smile to everyone that worked there.
It’s really about treating every soul you meet as something special..at times it’s enough at others it a show you start.
He had this great story he often flew from FL to NYC and everytime, he came back with new stories. When you have a bundle of energy in a confined space with an captive audience and you got a show. Well this time he sat next to a gay guy, my husband being very comfortable with himself and not a hint of homophobic in him, pretty much started to flirt with him. Just to have some fun…he got stories from this gay about everything he would often start with What do you have to sayyy..well at the end of the flight my husband had tied this guys hands to the armrest with the earphones all the passagers around him was all thinking it was the most hillarious thing they have ever seen..needless to say the gay guy were in love, when I picked him up he had this guy running around him. The gay guy loved it, he knew my husband was not gay… One of the other passengers we meet 10 years after and he could describe the story in detail..saying it was one of the most amazing moments in his life.
So much for being short..
Be kind to strangers for u may be entertaining angels unaware. A favorite biblical verse of mine. No matter who the person is you should at least be nice to them. When someone calls and it is the wrong number I will be polite and say you have the wrong number and wish them a good day.
This has always been my MO. Going to the bank (who even does that these days) or going to get groceries. Doesn’t matter where you are, people will be there. Anything can happen. Like David said, your life is one big party, and you want to have people come to it and have a good time. That’s what creates good conversations and that’s what makes people want to be around you more often.
When you have that energy, it’s infectious. People can’t help it. They want to be a part of it. A routine in your life is just an action that you have to do all the time, like get gas or go to the bank. How you go about it never has to be a routine.
Great point! I’ve been thinking the same thing myself and should really start doing it.
I’m on this like flies….
I’m trying this at the moment and was just pondering, what is the definition of a good interaction?
Any thoughts people?
Marina: You talk a lot about your husband, how long ago did he pass? Sounds like a great guy!
>>>>>>>>>>>>No matter who the person is you should at least be nice to them.
Would you be nice to a black gay fairy guy wearing all pink and flirting with your beer guzzling guy friends? Would you be nice to Bill Clinton or his wife? Would you be kind to Jesse Jackson? Trying to come up with more hated liberals them conservative South Bible carrying people love to hate:-)
I have been quiet, work is getting there….D Day is April 15:-)
Have fun at the community, I won’t be there, I know you miss me:-)
Every place is a opportunity to meet someone new…and have fun. We’ve the choice to create something new everyday for us, by changing our energy around us.
It’s the little thing in life that makes a huge difference!
Dan,
Thanks for noticing, don’t expect anyone to answer anything, but it’s nice when someone shows empathy when you share such a personal story..That is whole idea about noticing the small cues people give you and respond to them. I do that ever day, and on a lighter note Bangle Boy I’m a NYC girl at heart when I go too far..Fu that’s enough…that will quiet me down.
I more do this writing for my own help, very recently last October with as massive heart attack, two weeks before we were to move to a new house, new school just so many things to deal with in such a short time.
Yes he was big character, 6′ 4″ but at at heart of a teddy bear. To give you an idea he had people phenomenal people skills like David but not much into shopping unless I was getting lingerie…I was chuckling when I saw the enliven routine, I lived with it for 16 years and this way of living makes every day an adventure in life.
He made his money on Wall Steet by being able to just get what people wanted, even before they knew it them selves..But you could put him anywhere and they would realate to him, a true Mans man, truckers, powe brokers did not matter to him. Enough of that but nice you noticed, yes he is missed I am really using all these tools to get my feet back on the ground full speed. Alright talking too much again..well I am girl what do you guys want.
Now Dan-well you better use some real creativity to try to enliven paying taxes…that’s an easy one..Don’t go too crazy working
Ryan -
To me a good interaction is one in which the two of you feel better after leaving it. It could just be as simple as having a joke, making someone smile and walking away. That is an interaction and he/she feels good because they good a good laugh and you feel good because you made some laugh.
Any interaction where there is positive gain on both sides, I believe is a good interaction.
When you go out there, you out to have fun, of course, but you’re also out to bring positivity to other people’s lives as well, when you can. The more you do that, the more people will want to have those interactions with you.
Marina:
You are still grieving and it’s a process, you need to take it one day at a time and give it time…I have dealt with a very painful loss in my life and have dealt with clients who have lost spouses and sons and I know how difficult it is, believe me. There has not been a day I have not thought of the person I lost and it has been almost 11 years now!!! But after a long time of grieving you will realize that life has to go on. I hope you have close family and friends for support,just their presence helps!
My work revolves more around Wall Street than IRS for a while now…and I have had many heart attacks the last six monts, it appears with all the mayhem going on…In this business we are all trying to hang on to clients and hang on!
I am no Bible carrying religious Christian fanatic, but, in my own private way, I just want to say I am very sorry for your loss and I am praying for you to come back better than ever….
Marina: The best is yet to come….you just don’t know it yet.
We got to keep going!
Best,
Dan
I have been doing this – maybe it is where I live, but people are ALWAYS in their heads!!! I get a response maybe 1 out of 5 times even though I talk to everyone!
yes, 1 out of 5, that, I believe is the ratio DW talks about….
Marina- it is so good that you talk about your loving husband. The memories are happy, and thank you for sharing with us. Some people never experience what you had with your husband. Truly memories worth sharing and cherishing. My new guy is 6’4″ and so much like your husband. He is the most positive person I’ve ever met, and he unselfishly finds so many opportunities every day to make others happy, help them out when he can, make someone’s day by just saying “hi, how are you today?” I am learning to see life in such a new way. Your husband lives on in spirit through your stories and memories.
I’ve been learning that the best way to open a conversation with someone, even if it’s while on the errand run, is to comment or ask a question about them. Everyone likes to talk about themselves, me included! We have a customer that always wears these huge, quite eclectic hats. My first impression was, “e-gads, how rediculous”. But then, she pulls her outfits together in her own little way, and the hat tops it all off, and she is so confident. So, now everytime I see her I comment on how nice her hat looks, and she just beams with delight that someone noticed. I think you can apply that strategy to many situations. If a guy appears to be single, and (when I was single) I wanted to confirm things, I would make a comment like “bet your wife is glad you do the shopping”, or “looks like someone’s cooking romance for dinner”. If their single, usually you get a big response like, “oh no, not me, I’m a single guy”, and then you can go from there. And if things get akward, whatever, you can just move along and try again. It’s really fun.
Great topic again David.
Debs, my wingman can do that. He is 6’1″, blue eyes, experienced in what women want, ’cause, women(young ones, sometimes) walk up to him all the time. He is late 50′s now, and well versed in what a woman needs.
Hunter – my guy is just turning 50 and I think that he has learned that when you pay attention and learn about the opposite sex, your returns are many. He is not selfish, but very giving, but still very much a man. He’s caring but not a wimp, and knows when to take a stand, or just take a walk. Every day I am so blessed and thank God that this man has come into my life. My mother always said that love is better the second time around, and when your time is right, be ready and enjoy the ride. She passed 7 years ago, but I feel she is up there just beaming to finally see her daughter so happy and in love, being loved, and enjoying every day.
Over the years I’ve been probably as whiney, anxious and frustrated over finding Mr. Right as they come. I would have benefited from this blog long ago, and most likely taken advantage of David’s products, and even stepped out of my comfort zone and gone to a bootcamp. We can always learn about relationships, they are the most complicated thing ever. Between my difficult marriage, crazy dating senarios, and now finding a wonderful place with a loving man to land with every day, I would encourage people to listen and learn from David’s advice and experiences. He is so dead on right. Sometimes dead-on blunt, but we all need to hear it at some point. When my life was at it’s lowest, and I was completely falling apart, my best friend and I were driving somewhere. I was talking 80mph with gusts up to 120, a total wreck. She punched me in the arm (really hard!) and yelled, “get over it!” Then suggested we go to church on Sunday. She just wanted to help. She’s been there for me since kindgarten, and I needed to hear (and feel) what she had to say. It was my wake up call, and I thank her for it. (please don’t everyone start beating on their loved ones, it was a girl punch thing; think Elaine from Seinfeld) Seven years later I’ve transformed myself and life is great. If I can motivate anyone here to not give up and be honest with themselves, change will come if you truly follow your course and see yourself as you honestly are, then I’ve been of some help. To have David’s input here, and programs, are great tools. Take baby steps outside of the box, and start with yourself. Work the plan and enjoy the journey. And pay it forward whenever you can. You’ll discover a whole new side of yourself, and perhaps notice that your special person is right there in front of you, but now you have the clear vision available to see them.
DW does have words of wisdom