Comments on: Drop the Damn Ego http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/ Sex. Relationships. Dating. That's what I'm talkin' 'bout. Tue, 22 May 2012 08:31:39 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: Becky http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19270 Becky Mon, 27 Oct 2008 05:39:33 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19270 Met this really great guy online. He lives in California which is 3000 miles from me. I am not going to let this deter me. 5 hours away by jet. He is also 18 years older than me, maybe he can help me grow up. Can't wait to see him, we're meeting in NYC in ten days. I have set higher standards for myself, not the man I date. Ego aside this time, I feel this may really be something special. Met this really great guy online. He lives in California which is 3000 miles from me. I am not going to
let this deter me. 5 hours away by jet. He is also 18 years older than me, maybe he can help me grow up. Can’t wait to see him, we’re meeting in NYC in ten days. I have set higher standards for myself, not the man I date. Ego aside this time, I feel this may really be something special.

]]> By: Sam http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19257 Sam Sun, 26 Oct 2008 00:32:36 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19257 Matt Great post, spot on! Matt

Great post, spot on!

]]> By: Matt http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19243 Matt Sat, 25 Oct 2008 05:00:02 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19243 Ya know... ego gets in the way of everything. It doesn't just happen in love relationships. Ego, and the fear it brings with it, seems to destroy everything which enriches. One of the best pieces of advice I have ever seen on this site was the piece of advice that "... you don't chase, you become attractive..." It works everywhere. If you want love, you drop the unattractive, unloving things you do. If you want money, you drop all the wrong ideas you have about money (i.e. "money is hard to make," or "I have to pursue money in order to be successful, even if it means the loss of who I feel I am.") If you want success, you drop all those negative thoughts of being unsuccessful. You become attractive by not forcing the world into your own narrow views of how things should be. I have been learning these lessons over the last two years, since I was widowed. So many unbelievable things have happened to me in that time. I never knew the worst thing that could have ever happened to me would be the one thing which would shake many of those false ideas loose. Thanks, David, for being part of my own process of shaking free of these wrong ideas. Ya know… ego gets in the way of everything. It doesn’t just happen in love relationships. Ego, and the fear it brings with it, seems to destroy everything which enriches. One of the best pieces of advice I have ever seen on this site was the piece of advice that “… you don’t chase, you become attractive…” It works everywhere. If you want love, you drop the unattractive, unloving things you do. If you want money, you drop all the wrong ideas you have about money (i.e. “money is hard to make,” or “I have to pursue money in order to be successful, even if it means the loss of who I feel I am.”) If you want success, you drop all those negative thoughts of being unsuccessful. You become attractive by not forcing the world into your own narrow views of how things should be.

I have been learning these lessons over the last two years, since I was widowed. So many unbelievable things have happened to me in that time. I never knew the worst thing that could have ever happened to me would be the one thing which would shake many of those false ideas loose. Thanks, David, for being part of my own process of shaking free of these wrong ideas.

]]> By: K http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19234 K Fri, 24 Oct 2008 22:38:14 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19234 Too true! And while we are enjoying the company of our own ego, maybe someone will peel us a grape while we're waiting for the next great possibility to appear. DUH!! If the world is black and white and wherever we meet is the gray area - wouldn't it be a lot nicer to try to expand the shared gray area? Invite someone else in to make a little more gray? Otherwise we are walking up to the edge of our color boundary and drawing a line in the sand and say meet me halfway. That's like kissing through a window. Few people share the same definition of what 50-50 is. Step over your line so that the other person knows that they are also free to step over their line. Standing on principle is fine for the law when the issue really is about defined principles. But it has no place in the real world of real people with real feelings who do not share the same background, upbringing, and experiences that you do. That's why we get to know each other - to enlarge the shared, gray area. How much is enough unanswered text or e-mail? Your choice. You can cut them some slack and pick up a phone or go see them in person (yeah, I know, God forbid). Or you can sit at home and worry yourself sick and make your friends crazy with your whining. Or you can just blow it off and move on. Or any combination of the above and then a few other choices - like give them a holiday away from you (and your ego). Some might say, 'get a life' or 'enjoy your life and invite them along (but don't smother them).' Standing on principle is for inflexible people who think that the world revolves around them...which is fine if you enjoy the solitude of your own company. Want other people in your world? Loosen up and let it go. Too true! And while we are enjoying the company of our own ego, maybe someone will peel us a grape while we’re waiting for the next great possibility to appear. DUH!!

If the world is black and white and wherever we meet is the gray area – wouldn’t it be a lot nicer to try to expand the shared gray area? Invite someone else in to make a little more gray? Otherwise we are walking up to the edge of our color boundary and drawing a line in the sand and say meet me halfway. That’s like kissing through a window. Few people share the same definition of what 50-50 is. Step over your line so that the other person knows that they are also free to step over their line. Standing on principle is fine for the law when the issue really is about defined principles. But it has no place in the real world of real people with real feelings who do not share the same background, upbringing, and experiences that you do. That’s why we get to know each other – to enlarge the shared, gray area.

How much is enough unanswered text or e-mail? Your choice. You can cut them some slack and pick up a phone or go see them in person (yeah, I know, God forbid). Or you can sit at home and worry yourself sick and make your friends crazy with your whining. Or you can just blow it off and move on. Or any combination of the above and then a few other choices – like give them a holiday away from you (and your ego). Some might say, ‘get a life’ or ‘enjoy your life and invite them along (but don’t smother them).’ Standing on principle is for inflexible people who think that the world revolves around them…which is fine if you enjoy the solitude of your own company. Want other people in your world? Loosen up and let it go.

]]> By: Fleance Chew http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19229 Fleance Chew Fri, 24 Oct 2008 20:20:27 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19229 YUp Totally agree bro...but when do u stop? How many unanswered text or emails is enough to convince one knowing that she is not interested? YUp Totally agree bro…but when do u stop?
How many unanswered text or emails is enough to convince one knowing that she is not interested?

]]> By: Robert http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19220 Robert Fri, 24 Oct 2008 15:54:50 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19220 Good article. Everybody hates a bruised ego. Unfortunately, some peoples ego's are more easily bruised than others. Good article. Everybody hates a bruised ego. Unfortunately, some peoples ego’s are more easily bruised than others.

]]> By: Infinity http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19219 Infinity Fri, 24 Oct 2008 15:20:12 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19219 This is essential for any person that wants to be good at dating. Put in a little extra effort...and it's not even effort. You're sending a text message or email. What's so hard about that. I respond to well over 200 messages a day! Just suck it up and decide that you want to control what happens here. In other words, check you ego and be a man. The same goes for women here too...except for the "be a man" part. Nothing wrong with ladies making the effort as well. Could you imagine the possibilities if both want to "make the effort?" An emotional explosion is imminent. This is essential for any person that wants to be good at dating.

Put in a little extra effort…and it’s not even effort. You’re sending a text message or email. What’s so hard about that. I respond to well over 200 messages a day!

Just suck it up and decide that you want to control what happens here. In other words, check you ego and be a man.

The same goes for women here too…except for the “be a man” part. Nothing wrong with ladies making the effort as well.

Could you imagine the possibilities if both want to “make the effort?”

An emotional explosion is imminent.

]]> By: lady-timberwolf http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19218 lady-timberwolf Fri, 24 Oct 2008 12:41:06 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19218 hello,i saw this site on yahoo front page...so thought i'd check it out.....i'm 60 years old....widow and have met this man on line....he lives about a 100 miles away and he is widowed to and age 65......at first we emailed,then chat....he tried for 2 months to meet me,but i kept saying no.....then on a Sunday called him,ask if he wanted to meet.....he was here with in an hour and 1/2.........we have had 7 dates within 3 months.....once a week we see each other.....talk on phone 2-3 times a day.....calls me at 8am...8pm...maybe at lunch.......this is my first time to date,since my husband died.........alot more to tell.. need help and advice..........probably already know it. thanks hello,i saw this site on yahoo front page…so thought i’d check it out…..i’m 60 years old….widow and have met this man on line….he lives about a 100 miles away and he is widowed to and age 65……at first we emailed,then chat….he tried for 2 months to meet me,but i kept saying no…..then on a Sunday called him,ask if he wanted to meet…..he was here with in an hour and 1/2………we have had 7 dates within 3 months…..once a week we see each other…..talk on phone 2-3 times a day…..calls me at 8am…8pm…maybe at lunch…….this is my first time to date,since my husband died………alot more to tell..
need help and advice……….probably already know it.
thanks

]]> By: Erika http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19216 Erika Fri, 24 Oct 2008 04:42:29 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19216 It's a dance. Sometimes it's easier for me if I admire the other person's artistry. ;-) It’s a dance. Sometimes it’s easier for me if I admire the other person’s artistry. ;-)

]]> By: Lou bega http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/drop-the-damn-ego/1007/#comment-19215 Lou bega Fri, 24 Oct 2008 04:39:58 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=1007#comment-19215 Ur damn right DW! Ur damn right DW!

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