It’s funny – my life is really interesting, and it’s a blast. I work a lot – I would definitely be considered a workaholic – a lot of these blogs are written at two o’clock in the morning.
But anyway, then we went for a hike, we’ve probably written about 30 blogs today, we did some audio – we did a new audio confession, another one of my Girls Tell All series tonight – which is a very interesting product that is coming out that I’ll tell you about in a week or two.
Yakub and Khiem were asking me tonight how have I become so good at dirty talk. And really, I love dirty talk. And let’s not say ‘dirty,’ I’d rather use the term ‘naughty.’
So how did I get so good at naughty talk?
I have to thank my college girlfriend. Not Amy Alterman, Amy Alterman was my college girlfriend junior year. I used to call her FISP – which stood for Flicking Itching Scratching and Picking – she was definitely very neurotic, and I teased her, of course. I’ve always been teasing women since I was a child!
But I have to thank Ellen Weinberger. Ellen Weinberger was this hot, sexy girl from Livingston, New Jersey, that I went to American University with. And Ellen Weinberger – every guy in school wanted her. I met her when I was a sophomore and she was a freshman. She had one of those incredible bodies – 5’3”, natural big breasts, thin little body, brunette, big eyes, and she just reeked of sex appeal.
She was one of the sexiest girls you’ve ever seen. Every guy wanted her in school, but the problem was: she had a boyfriend.
Her boyfriend was this guy named Norm. Norm walked with a limp because he got into some car wreck, so we called him the Limping Boyfriend from Brooklyn (of course, being immature 19-year-olds, that was about the most clever thing we could come up with.) Ellen and I had instant chemistry, but she had this boyfriend.
I used to go to her room, we used to catch a buzz, and we used to talk dirty to each other. We would literally sit there and tell each other what we would do to each other if we were both single. So I would leave her room, after getting her all hot, and she’d go sleep with her boyfriend (because every weekend she’d go to Brooklyn to see Norm.) I’d go out and have sex with some random little college babe that I’d tried to hook up with – sometimes I’d get lucky, sometimes I wouldn’t.
At the end of the weekend, I would always see Ellen again, and we’d catch a buzz, and I’d look directly into her eyes and tell her, flat out, that I’d thought about her while I was sleeping with someone else. And I’d tell her about the things I’d want to do to her, and how great it would be if she’d just dump Norm.
This went on for two years. We just talked dirty to each other for two years! It was unbelievable. It was the most freeing, fantastic experience. I couldn’t have her because she kept dating Norm, but the conversations got deeper, more erotic, and more sexual – I knew everything about her sexually.
Then, halfway through my senior year, I went to Florida and came back. It was 1984. January 1984 – the start of my last semester of college. That was the year that old man coats were in style – if you remember those long woolen coats you could get at thrift stores.
I bought an old man coat, I had a little suntan, and I walked into Ellen’s apartment. It was on a Thursday night – we used to go out on Thursday nights, we’d catch a buzz and then go out and drink some more. We used to just flirt and tease each other, and then I’d pick up another girl and she’d go to see Norm the next day.
I remember picking her up, and doing our usual thing, flirting, teasing, talking dirty to each other, and then I dropped her off at her apartment. I asked her if she was going to see Norm that weekend and she said she was actually going to stay around here. I said, alright, cool, and told her we should get together. She said alright, and then she grabbed me, and she kissed me!
Now this was like two years of dirty talk culminating in this fantastic kiss. I was kissing Ellen Weinberger, the girl that everybody at school wanted, and I finally had her!
Ellen Weinberger and I ended up going out for the next two years.
She taught me how to be free with my words. How to push the envelope – how to not care – because our situation was safe. I was busy turning her on for two years with dirty talk, and she was having sex with her boyfriend and thinking about the things that I’d said – and then she would tell me about it.
That’s how I learned how to talk dirty – that’s how I learned how to push it. That’s how I learned what to say, what not to say, and how to say it.
I have to thank Ellen for allowing me to be free. Ever since then, I’ve always been able to say what’s on my mind sexually. Always. Being sexually free is really what it’s about. When I talk dirty I’m not talking in a very graphic way, I’m talking very subliminally. But that’s how it all started.
I really believe that when you’re growing up, it’s the experiences that you have with the first couple of women that really set the stage to what kind of man you’re going to become. And I had fantastic sexual experiences with my first few girlfriends.
My high school girlfriend wouldn’t sleep with me, but we had foreplay all day long. So when all my friends were trying to get laid – thinking about it all the time and then not getting laid – I was getting some great education in foreplay. I learned the importance of foreplay at the age of 17!
And I learned the importance of dirty talk at the age of 19. I had to get really good at talking dirty to get Ellen to break up with Norm. It took me two years of dirty talk to get her to breakup. Two years of practice allows you to perfect it! Once I got her to breakup with Norm, I had the confidence to talk dirty to any woman out there.
So that’s my story of how I learned to talk dirty. What’s yours?
My dirty talk went to a whole different level after I left “Camp David” to get home. For those of you whose wondering what is Camp David? sounds like a military base doesn’t? Well we call it Camp David b/c we all stay in the office talk about our clients, products, and goals or plans.
Yes I can attest D. is a “craftsman”, and its a blast working with him!!
Anyhow, after watching David create the “get her off the phone” secret product and hearing the woman say “ohhhhhh David” over and over, it blew my mind.
People pay to have phone sex, now here is a guy that woman begged to have sex with. Right away I was like I want to learn the art of naught or dirty talk.
When I got home I started talking on the phone with a woman I met earlier, we really clicked. So I implement what I learned from David and also listening to me gut helped me dirty talk with this woman called J.
sorry can’t say her full name, b/c she might be your mother, daughter or wife (jk)
Soon we started to dirty talk and I got her off the phone 4 nights a week for at least 3 months. She would call me back, and leave some of the best “orgasm message” when I was working. I loved hearing her voice climax over the phone saying my name and she is getting off at the same time saying “ohhhhh babe, guess what I am doing now, my hands are all wet….”
Then I met her in person after 4 months. It took David 2 years, and it took me 4 months, interesting ok ok……I am joking D.
I learned from her a lot about how sensual and naughty woman become when they find the right sensual guy.
Woman don’t want a horny guy that says right away, “I want to fuck you.” They want a man to stimulate their mind, slowly, sensually, until it all builds up, and she can’t take it anymore.
That’s how I started to naughty talk and as of today I love and enjoy dirty talk.
So thanks to D. and few of the amazing woman in the past years.
“I really believe that when you’re growing up, it’s the experiences that you have with the first couple of women that really set the stage to what kind of man you’re going to become.”
I completely disagree with this statement. But of course I would. If you take the writer’s approach, there are MANY, MANY, MANY things that shape what kind of man you are going to become. Women is just one part.
Mike
I sincerely LOVE the “Girls Tell All” program! It’s a little like having my own group of Ellen Weinbergers to teach me about female sexuality.
Oh yeah guys try this one on for size.
David are you being naughty again what has that girlfriend been doing to you? Sexual Sensualities we all have them. I don’t like a guy that is captain come quick or acts like a rabbit in heat. I like em slow and easy. I love it when a guy moans or just plan being naughty and allowing me to explore what turns him on. In turn I will allow the guy to explore his sexuality with me. Has anyone ever allowed their fantasies to come to reality by allowing the woman to become the model of the fantasy. I love to start from head to toe and make a few pit stops. But if you want to play rabbit forget about this ball field. Captain cum-quicks are for those who have not had it in awhile.
I like em hard long and stiff.
haha, that was A LOT of patience David!
and i can 100% understand this intense chemistry but with a boyfriend thing…..
>>>>>>>I like em hard long and stiff.
apparently so do many Catholic priests too lol
Talking dirty, talking naughty… brings back memories from when I was in my late twenties, been single the 1st time around and feeling invincible (been tall & strong). Looking back, I was stupid and could have got killed. A young girl, married to an old musician (country girl) was looking for an affair and we hooked up. I was the opposite, a city boy from overseas. She worked with me. At work we would engage in some heated naughty talk, especially been at work and shit. Not proud of previous mistakes I have made, but this blog brought back memories of that dirtiest of talks. Some times the dirty talk can be more powerful than physical foreplay… and for some reason it (the tension) stays in women’s minds for a long time.
Dan
I knew you would do that I am sitting lmao for I knew that somewhere deep inside that you would follow up on me. But Dan I have heard some crazy tales about Catholic Priest and little boys. Now that is sick.
CHAMP !!! David… CHAMP!!!
Hey Guys
Why not practice what you preach do you think that would be more fun than teasing us to do death. Wanna see who can get more sensual and sexy? Lets see what u have in those pants it not what you have it is what you can do with it.
Dirty talk is powerfully addicting… and not just for the woman, but for the man too!
I personally love dirty talking because I get to see my girlfriend’s eyes light up with lust. What can I say? I’m just a man… and knowing that I can turn her on turns me on.
In return… if a woman can do the same thing, it’s an even bigger turn on. As men, we like to know we are desired too.
I’ve had the good fortune to have some very good male friends over the years. A few were gay, most not, but all were very instrumental in acquiring this skill set. I didn’t realize how much until this post. I found that a little off-color banter breaks down a lot of communication barriers and surprisingly allows for more relaxed and open talk on other subjects. It’s like passing a secret test. And when you actually practice this skill, it’s always nice to see someone else’s face light up because they know that you like them enough to have a little sport with them, whether it’s serious or not. It’s also tells them that you trust them enough to have a little fun and they don’t have to worry about you turning them in to HR. I work with blue-collar men and one woman and our guys know that if they slip up, drop an F-bomb or are just feeling a little frisky, that we can take it and give it back as well. No harm – no foul, but a LOT of laughs. And in a terribly proper, politically-correct company like ours, it’s a safe haven to be normal.
I thought about this blog today & really dwelled on it. No really I did. It’s nice to hear that it is ok to do that because it IS FUN and stimulating for us women! I just can’t help it. I don’t know how other women are. Most may not do that, but I’ve got to have fun and this is one way to do that. There are some guys who won’t talk dirty though because they think it is disrespecting the woman. I disagree though & think by not talking dirty, the woman won’t know if you are sexually attracted to them or not!
I agree, Reynold, that was a lot of patience on David’s part.
Thanks Khiem for posting that it turns you guys on as well.
Aw, but I hate the kind of dirty talk that doesn’t last forever. It would be great to find someone to talk “dirty” to forever.
Of course, dirty talk isn’t ACTUALLY dirty.
Like we’ve said before, if you can understand a woman’s mind and capture her there, the connection is so much deeper. Communication is an art, and your imagination has no limits. Thanks again David for another fun way to communicate!
so how does this apply to women you just met or barely know? Wouldn’t banter/teasing be better in that scenario? I know binary, but not a woman’s mind…well actually i lied, i can’t understand neither. ha!