Create Your Own Network
June 7, 2008 
17 Comments
Create Your Own Network By David Wygant
The biggest mistake most men make is that they walk around waiting for a hot girl to talk to. In reality, by waiting for that hot girl, they’re not creating any energy around them.
What you need to do is to start talking to people in every store that you go into. You need to talk to people there and remember things about them.
For instance, we were hanging out and we went into this sunglasses store. I’ve been in this store probably 10 times, and I’ve bought two pairs of sunglasses from there. When I walked in, both people working there immediately said hello to me and came right over.
The salespeople were treating the person I was with really well also, talking to him and being really nice. When he bought something, they gave him a discount. He got a discount because he knew me. Just knowing me is not always necessarily going to get you a discount, but since I had been there before and always been really nice, friendly, and I asked questions about them, they wanted to give him a discount.
When I walk into a place, people are going to stop and talk to me. The great thing about that is that everywhere you go, you start getting friendly with people. If you go to the supermarket, get friendly with the person behind the cash register – it’s very important! Get friendly with the person that makes your sandwiches. Get friendly with the person that pours your coffee.
The reason for this is that there will be a time in your life when you are going to see a woman that you are attracted to, and you’re going to have approach anxiety. You’ll just have one of those days where you’re not feeling that comfortable with yourself – or maybe not feeling all that secure. So what do you do in that situation?
It is so much easier to talk to somebody you already know. For instance, let’s say you in line at the grocery store, and there’s a woman behind you that’s really cute and she’s got you feeling tongue-tied – you know that feeling you get when your tongue is tied and you can’t undo it?
So what do you do? You talk to the person who you know – you talk to Joe, the guy who’s scanning your groceries and you remember things about him. You say, “hey, Joe, how’s the newborn treating you?” All of a sudden Joe says, “wow, it’s been really tough.” You might say, “have you been having trouble sleeping?” All of a sudden Joe starts laughing – and you’ve bonded with Joe.
Most of life is very non-verbal. So the woman standing behind you sees the way that Joe is looking at you, and it’s very favorable. She sees the way his eyes are lighting up, the smile on his face – what that is telling her is that this guy in front of her in line at the supermarket is a nice guy.
What happens then is that you start meeting people based on your energy, but the key lesson here is that you start attracting people. You’re not chasing women anymore – you’re attracting them.
I’ve written about this before, in a lot of blogs – be the mayor of your life, be in complete control of your life, create powerful energy in your life – but this is something that you need to be doing over and over again.
The key to meeting people is engaging everybody in conversation, becoming memorable, and attracting people to you, rather than spending your entire life chasing.
I go deeper into this in todays video.
I think a good point here is that you don’t need to focus on the girl to create attraction with her. Not something that most guys ever realize. Think outside the box people
ya i agree with you guys its all about building the momentum, so when the right time comes its like a tsunami of hot girls and opportunities!
Yacutie;
I see you there all quiet in the background…lookin sexy there.
This is an honest question and serious…yes Me serious, for but a sentence..lol
Are you pumping a little iron htese days or just growing up into a buff young man? You look a little on the “swole” side…looks good whatever you’re doin..keep it up and STAY YOU
David;
The hat? Have you always worn a hat and I wasn’t looking at your head? LOL haaa (Get it??) If not I will leave it alone ehemmmm
Oh my god david where you got THAT hat??
)
greetings
markus
2- part question for anyone who would care to answer:
Is the flattery in the situation enough to go on if you are approached by someone who appears to have the sole intent of starting up a conversation based only on, for example date/sex/phone #/ even business deal?
Or turn-off and you would rather be approached by someone who appears interested in starting an interaction with a human, first, followed by the sub-text of the other stuff after/overtime?
Hey Markus
In a store in santa monica and the best part is that i did not have to carry it home:)
Hey Christine,
I’m not sure I understood the question completely, but I’ll give it a shot.
I think anyone, man or woman, would usually find it flattering to be approached because someone finds them attractive. Of course there are exceptions, more so for women than men, and the confidence and manner of the person approaching has a lot to do with how things go.
But regardless of whether the conversation started with “Hey, sexy! What’s up?” or “Hey, how’s it going?”, it MUST end up moving toward some kind of genuine connection.
Think about an interaction that went well versus one that went poorly (business or romantic — it doesn’t matter). So you started talking and you figured out there was some interest. And then you kept talking… about what?
The difference between the good conversation and the bad one was that you made a real, authentic connection. You learned something about each other and now the initial interest was justified and confirmed by the rest of the conversation.
No one wants to be liked because they have amazing abs or nice boobs — at least not for more than a few hours. Anyone would love to be desired for their fascinating personality, their business acumen, or their sense of humor.
Mom was right (kind of). It’s what’s inside that counts.
– Patrick
Great post Patrick!
Patrick-
Oh yes, Patrick, you did understand what I was asking. Thank you for answering and for a really great answer. I was looking for some perceptions, possibly. And perhaps if how often and if many people are just keyed in to the PUA and the genuine approaches.
Your answer was a really great way to put what not to do and what to do in trying to start a conversation. And I was really hoping that one of the guys would answer, so Thanks, again.
Patrick-
Oh yes, Patrick, you did understand what I was asking. Thank you for answering and for a really great answer. I was looking for some perceptions, possibly. And perhaps if how often and if many people are just keyed in to the PUA and the genuine approaches.
Your answer was a really great way to put what not to do and what to do in trying to start a conversation. And I was really hoping that one of the guys would answer, so Thanks, again.
And while that answer may seem obvious to many, it is not to just as many more. It what’s on the inside that counts.
DW, that hat gotta go, please…have some respect for your audience:-)
Joan: let’s hope Yakoob is pumping some iron and not steroids…they have factories of that stuff in LA!
Spent a couple of nights at the Beverly Hilton last month and visited Venice Beach, Santa Monica, Long Beach and Malibu…I am not saying with who;-)
Christine,
You know which one you like best, right?
So what if you immediately feel someone only wants that date, sex, phone number or business deal?
Well what would you feel like doing?
just kidding
Do you want to give in? Do you want to get out? Do you want to play? Do you want to diss them in front of the entire supermarket?
Seeing as maybe you wanted to get what us men would do, I’ll share what I would do: I’d play
We can have fun with it. That’s what I like to do. And who knows you’ll enjoy the other person after all!
Yakub and I should have worn our hats for the video too! We completely forgot to take a pic of all of us dressing alike.
Yakub and I were the David Wygant Jrs…. ;p
Don’t tell me the PUA Guru has those around him copying his style?
LOL Ken,
You should not worry about us copying DW. It was all for shit and giggles.
Ok, it doesn’t sound like you’d copy the expressions of a PUA…
Pete-
Thanks for your insights from the guys perspective. Didn’t mean I don’t want any of the ladies to add their voice to it.
So many different scenarios, but yeah, mainly play with it. The situation, not really the person.
I guess I wasn’t awake enough to phrase it very well; it had a lot to do with seeing the genuiness of an approach and how people feel about it. Which totally may vary across situations. But in that overall sense, more often for ” what’s on the inside”.
Don’t forget that other people find the blog plus some people hang out and never post.
Note: Not sure how 2 versions of a post I made above showed up- sorry for that.