I’m going to do something for all of you politically correct and politically incorrect people: I’m going to wish you all a Merry Christmas! To everyone who celebrates Christmas, I want to wish you and your families the best of Christmases.

Hope you are having a white Christmas if you are in a winter state or in Miami (Oops, that was the 80’s). Hopefully Santa has given all of you what you wanted this year for Christmas. For those of you who don’t believe in Santa, you might have missed out on some extra presents.

Today is a day to reflect, and to be with friends and family. It’s a day to drink eggnog and to get drunk with your uncle for some of you. No matter how you celebrate it, though, it’s a day to be with and embrace your family.

So there will be no dating advice today. There will be no relationship advice today.

As for tomorrow, isn’t that “Black Friday?” No, wait, that’s the day after Thanksgiving. You can go to the mall tomorrow, though, and return all the bad gifts your grandmother gave you. Everything is 50%, so you can get some great things … but does that mean if we wait another day or two everything will be 100% off?

Today I’m on the beach in Mexico celebrating an amazing Christmas with my girlfriend, the person who is closest to me. We are going to spend the day sitting on the beach drinking margaritas, and Santa is going to deliver us a couple of yummy burritos.

So no matter what you’re doing today, I want to wish you the very best Christmas.

Happy Christmas Eve to all …. and a happy Wednesday to those of you who are not celebrating Christmas. This message today (although inspired by a classic Christmas movie) applies to everyone!

Do you remember these poignant words which the angel Clarence said to Jimmy Stewart’s character George Bailey in It’s A Wonderful Life?: “Strange, isn’t it? Each man’s life touches so many other lives. When he isn’t around he leaves an awful hole, doesn’t he? . . . Dear George, remember no man is a failure who has friends . . . See George, you really had a wonderful life. Don’t you see what a mistake it would be to just throw it all away?”

I know know how stressful the holiday season can be. I will get stressed out too if I have to watch one more Zales diamond jewelry commercial. Then again, if it is followed up by the Budweiser horses then it’s okay.

It’s almost the end of December 2008. Have you thought about how wonderful your life really is, or are you too busy thinking about what you don’t have?

If you’re a man, maybe you are wishing you were better with women. If you’re a woman, you are perhaps wishing that more men would approach you. You might be thinking about how much chemistry you thought you had with the last person you dated, yet they didn’t call you back.

The problem that I find coaching so many people that are single, is that they are always thinking about what they don’t have. When I coach someone, I find that they seem to only focus on all the things that they are NOT, instead of embracing all the things that they are.

It’s amazing how many people come to me who really want to learn how to approach women (or men), but they don’t want to put in the work necessary to learn how to do it. They don’t practice every single day, and they don’t embrace the small victories that happen every day.

What so many people do is they try something once, and if it doesn’t work then they quit. Last season, Peyton Manning threw six interceptions against the Chargers. He didn’t quit. He was down 21–0 and he kept coming back.

How is it he can throw six interceptions and keep going, but the average single person who learns a new approach will give it only one chance to work? They will try it once, and if it doesn’t work they’ll quit and re-embrace their fears all over again.

During this holiday season and in the new year, give yourself permission to try new things and new approaches. If you are only able to talk to someone for 30 seconds, then the very next day try to talk to someone for 35 seconds. Learn to embrace the small victories.

It seems though that when people are single, they always want to know ahead of time if they are going to succeed. They don’t believe or understand that learning to approach and connect with the opposite sex is a process that will have successes and failures along the way.

Recently a student of mine said to me “David, I don’t want to approach a woman unless I know 100% for sure that it’s going to work.” So I used the football analogy on him, and I asked him “Is there anything in life that’s 100%?” The only things that are 100% in life are, as they say, death and taxes.

So during this holiday season, give yourself some goals for the new year. You just can’t win the Super Bowl the first time you ever play the game.

So take a look at your life and where you are, and start embracing little gains. In order to become a master communicator, you need to put the time and effort in to make it happen. It’s not just going to happen overnight.

Every day allow yourself some practice time. Go out and flirt with two people today, and then maybe with three tomorrow. Instead of getting frustrated with yourself, start accepting the small gains.

In order for somebody to share your wonderful life with you, you need to first realize that your life is wonderful.

Today’s video will show you how you can comfortably and easily create an opener. It will help you as you go out there to do this daily practice and to get those daily wins.

Have you met a guy during the last six months whom you really liked a lot, but for some reason or other things just didn’t work out with him?

Perhaps you two went out and you (or he) over-thought things after the date.

Perhaps the two of you never called each other thinking the other would make that first phone call.
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It’s the holiday season, and I am currently in Hot Springs, Arkensas enjoying some holiday cheer.

Today, I want to leave you with a thought.

I want you to think about this statement and tell me how it makes you feel:

“True Love Constantly Blows Me Away Every Day”

I look forward to reading the responses from all of you!

Over the river and through Whole Foods to anyone’s house we go …

So on this Thanksgiving Day, I wanted to share with all of you my take on the day — as well as a little personal message from me.

Did you sing that song as a kid — you know, the “Over The River And Through The Woods To Grandmother’s House We Go …” song? I never really understood the “over the river and through the woods” analogy for Thanksgiving because my Grandmother made the driest turkey this side of the Sahara Desert.

We’re about to head into the holiday season. Six weeks of tedious annoying Zales Jewelers commercials, not to mention that lovely $69.00 diamond pendant with diamonds the size of bedbugs.

What Thanksgiving really kicks off (other than the end of the Chargers’ playoff hopes) is the start of the most vulnerable six weeks of the year for singles. Let’s call it “the quest to meet someone before 5-4-3-2-1 woo hoo Happy New Year!”

I’ve had some great Thanksgiving Days though. I remember a few years ago when I had nothing going on for Thanksgiving. So I walked into Whole Foods the day before Thanksgiving and I picked up my Thanksgiving dinner: a box of Peanut Butter Bumpers and soy milk.

As I was looking for some pumpkin pie to finish off my sugar rush, I bumped into this really sexy woman who had a cart full of some really great looking food. So I started a conversation with her:

DW: “Your dinner looks a lot better than mine.”
Her: “Please tell me that’s not your Thanksgiving dinner.”
DW: “I’d love to tell you it’s not not my Thanksgiving dinner, but that would be a lie. I was going to get Cruchberries, but they were out of them. Crunchberries remind me of my Grandmother’s cranberry sauce and dried out turkey.”

We proceeded to talk, and she said that she refused to let me eat Peanut Butter Bumpers for Thanksgiving … and I got invited to a Thanksgiving night party with her and seven of her friends.

I have a confession to make to all of you — I’ve done that every year I’ve been single.

I actually enjoy spending Thanksgiving with total strangers. I mean, didn’t the pilgrims do that before they killed all the Indians? Then again, my knowledge of history is a little poor at times …

So if you want to know where I’ll be today, I will be spending the day with my girlfriend and having dinner with friends.

On a more serious note, I do want to wish all of you and your families a very Happy Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is a day to be thankful, and I am thankful for many things this year. A thanks to all of you for letting me come into your hearts, minds … and your computer screens this year.

Also, a special thank you to all the guys who — once again in overwhelmingly large numbers — were kind enough to send me the feedback I requested yesterday for the upcoming launch of my membership site.

So Enjoy Turkey Day!

Having coached both men and women for more than a decade, I have had the opportunity to have both sexes confess to me their biggest complaints about the other. One of the biggest pet peeves I hear from the guys I coach is that women are too negative.

Are they saying that women are unfriendly people as a gender? Of course not. Guys complain most often to me that when they ask women questions when they first meet them - whether it be a woman they approach for the first time or a woman with whom they are out on a first date - that women tend to be very negative in how they answer them.

For example, a guy during a first date may ask a woman about her past relationships, and she will bash her ex-boyfriend by saying something like “Oh, my ex-boyfriend was such an idiot. He cheated on me, and he was a complete jerk.” Then she will go on to tell the guy about all the stuff that her ex-boyfriend did that were bad.

Even if all of that is true, women need to understand how this is perceived by the men who are hearing it. In particular, women need to understand how it is perceived by men who are just meeting you or are just newly getting to know you.

When you speak negatively about a past relationship, a guy hearing that will think that if he gets involved with you that at some point down the road you will be bashing him to someone else. Don’t be so negative about your past experiences.

Don’t also be negative about what is going on in your life currently. Don’t talk negatively about your friends. Men don’t care about the turmoil that is going on in your life and with your friends.

Men don’t care that your friend did not show up at your other friend’s birthday party and didn’t even a send a present. The only thing a guy will notice is that they are on a first date with you and you are speaking negatively about your friend.

Men want to see you be positive on a first date. We don’t want to hear about all of that other negative stuff when we haven’t gotten to know you yet.

I can’t tell you how many times when I’ve walked up to a woman and started talking to her by asking how her day is, that she will begin her answer with some version of “My day is lousy…” Then when I ask her why, she will elaborate with a list of one negative thing after another.

Don’t be so negative. When men first meet you, they want to see the positive and cheery side of you.

Men of course understand that life is not all positive and cheery. In the beginning, though, show men your good side.

We all have a negative side. We all have things about which to complain. We all have things that don’t go our way. That’s perfectly fine, just don’t bring all of that up on a first date.

Don’t bash your friends and don’t be negative about past relationships. Be positive on a first date, because you need to think positive things in order to attract a great new relationship.

I remember a woman with whom I had a first date who illustrates this point perfectly. I asked her on that date whether she dated a lot, and she answered “no.” When I asked her why, her answer was “Because men suck.” She then proceeded for the next ten minutes to tell me all the reasons why men ’suck.’

The thing was, I didn’t want to hear about why she believes men ’suck.’ It didn’t matter. I could have said “women suck too” to try and be nice and agree with her, but they don’t. I don’t judge women as a gender based on what certain women in my past may or may not have done.

When I’m on a first date, I am open to finding out who that particular woman is and what she is all about. You should have that same attitude when you meet a new guy.

The fact is that if you’re having a bad run in life, only you can change it. So if you’re negative and you complain when you meet someone new, then you are just perpetuating that bad run and it will simply continue. So stop being negative, and start giving your future a better chance to be positive.

Today’s blog is directed to the men … but don’t worry, Ladies, there will be some great stuff just for YOU coming out as well!

But this message today is for the guys. I’m taking Daphne for a walk on the beach, typing this note to you on my BlackBerry.

I couldn’t believe it when I saw it … and I really need your help. Before I ask you, though, let me back up and catch you up on what’s been going on in my life.

As many of you know, I just moved to a new place and, of course, NOTHING is working right!

No Internet.
No Cable.
No Deliveries coming to the right places.
And don’t even get me started about building management …

Suffice it to say it’s been a FRUSTRATING week. Then I saw it — and all I could say was WOW!

Roughly 10 days ago, I happened to mention that my team and I had been brainstorming ideas for my new men’s community membership site that I’ll be launching in January 2009.

Although I already knew many of you were excited about this Launch (I still am surprised how FAST and how many of you have been signing up on the List for the site), BUT when I was finally able just now to check my emails, I was STUNNED at what I found.

There were literally HUNDREDS of you who had emailed me your lists (and some of them were pretty
BIG lists) of what YOU wanted me to include on this new site. I mean, you guys were busy …

The response was truly OVERWHELMING!

There were so many emails that it actually CRASHED my BlackBerry server’s capacity for a while — so sorry to any of you whose emails were returned.

So here’s where your help comes into play.

As AMAZING as this flood of emails was to me, since I had NO idea so many of you were THIS excited about this Launch, I now have SO MANY suggestions, requests, and “wish lists” that it would take Rey and Rich (my assistants) a good MONTH to sift through all of them!

And let me assure you that this site IS going to Launch in January 2009 NO MATTER WHAT. So I need all of you to help me out now.

Whether or not you have already emailed me your suggestions and wishes for what you want to see on my new membership site, what I want you to do NOW is to think about the MOST IMPORTANT things to you that you want to see on the membership site — and specifically, what are the TOP 2 things
you would want to see.

THEN, I want YOU to click on this link and send those to me (cause I have GOT to narrow this HUGE list of suggestions down) :
http://mycommunity.davidwygant.com/WhatIWant.html

PLUS, I want to be really sure I know what is most important to you and what YOU really want to see!

Here’s your chance to be a surrogate member of my team. Sit down and ask yourself what you would
MOST like me to include, because I want this site to not just be GREAT or even FANTASTIC — I want it to be the BEST MEMBERSHIP site anywhere on the Internet (and more importantly, one that YOU will want to visit every day!)

So click on this link and get your “TOP 2″ in right away:
http://mycommunity.davidwygant.com/WhatIWant.html

Remember, I’m counting on you to give me a hand during this moving nightmare I’m living.

Oh … and I almost forgot! Since I really do appreciate this HUGE flood of interest in the Launch of this site AND your help in sending me your “Top 2,” I want to give you FREE (if you haven’t already gotten it) my audio “How To Meet Women Over The Holidays”

OK … I think Daphne’s about ready to go back in the house (and I’m maybe ready to go back in and face the next moving crisis…)

Thanks in advance and I’ll be talking to you soon.

P.S.: Ladies, make sure to check back here tomorrow — I’ll be back with more great blogs!

Robert By David Wygant

Before you read todays blog you need to make sure that you check out todays free podcast at the bottom.

Soulmates…..Myth or Reality?

Todays blog will be part of a live coaching from London with a client. Hopefully these exchanges with my client will give you an idea of my coaching style. Consider it a sneak peek into what I do when I am coaching clients and leading bootcamps!
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