Wait a second, what is David talking about? I thought he didn’t like the number stuff. I thought he said a guy that calls women 7, 8, 9s, and 10s was immature. I thought he said that there is only a “one” and a “two”: one, you want to hang with; two, you don’t. What is he talking about, the “perfect 10”?

When I talk about a “perfect 10” I’m talking about everything that you want—that’s your perfect 10. Everything that you deserve is your perfect 10.

You should never use the number system to rate women; it is a little immature, and it is a little ridiculous. Not only that, but it just makes you look like an idiot if anybody ever hears you talking that way. Plus, you’re not perfect, so why should you be rating other people?

So, here is what is important about the perfect 10: the perfect 10 is somebody that you are so ridiculously attracted to that she is a perfect 10. She’s amazing; she’s hot; she’s sexy; and here’s the deal: you need to find your version of the perfect 10 because otherwise, you’re never going to be satisfied.

If you’re constantly settling on women that really don’t rock your world, that you don’t find absolutely beautiful inside and out, you’re constantly going to be looking, you’re constantly going to be wondering what else there is out there.

Every guy deserves his perfect 10. And you should never be influenced by your friends. If you think a woman is absolutely, incredibly gorgeous; if you think she’s sexy as can be; if you think she’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen—stop getting validated by your friends.

If your friends tell you that you can do better, what does that matter? The only thing that matters is how you feel, how you look at that woman, and what you think of her—not what your friends think. You don’t need her to walk into a party and be a head-turner. What’s important is what you think about her.

So, you’re perfect 10 is going to be somebody that you say wow to, that you think is amazing, that you find sexy all the time. So, stop being influenced by outside sources. Stop trying to prove yourself through outside sources, and start looking at the people you date, and ask yourself: is she the person that is going to turn me on? Is she the person that’s a perfect 10 on the inside? Is she the women that is going to rock my world in every way, shape, and form?

If you’re not with a woman that you think is the perfect 10, you need to let her go. Get back out there, start talking it up, and get serious about finding your perfect 10.

They had good pedigree. They were successful and age appropriate. They were good-looking. They followed up with phone calls. Then all of a sudden—poof—they just vanished.

You’re in shock. You can’t believe that this one went away. You felt like it was the perfect kind of a relationship. You really felt like you were ready for it. You really needed this relationship because you were so tired of dating. You were tired of putting yourself online and having nothing happen. You were tired of going to the parties and heading out to the same bars and restaurants. You felt like this was the one.

Here’s the deal: everything that you’ve ever known about dating is wrong. During those three weeks you never kept a dating journal. See, Mr. and Mrs. Perfect do not exist. What we do when we date is we get caught up in what I call the oxytocin moment. We get caught up in this wave of emotion, like a drug is released in our bodies.

It feels so good to be rescued from being single. But in reality, the warning signs are there from the beginning. I tell everybody in my very new book, Naked, to keep a dating journal, and write down how you feel at the end of each date. How does this person make you feel? Do you feel desired? Do you feel excited? Take it even deeper. Do you keep a journal where you know exactly the way you need to feel in a relationship?

My new book Naked goes really deep into dating. It gets you to fall in love with the most important person in your life: you. Because when it comes down to dating, most of us date based on needs. I need to have a relationship. I need to no longer be single. I need to find somebody different because the last person didn’t treat me well.

What Naked does is it takes everything down to the root and allows you to forgive everything that’s gone on in your life and allows you to embrace all the lessons you’ve learned. But more importantly, it gets you to fall in love with who you are as a person. It allows you to realize that you’re an amazing catch.

Naked is almost 200 pages of daily exercises that help you no longer date out of need, out of frustration, or out of desperation. When it comes to love, in order to find someone to love you the way you need to be loved, you need to love yourself first. You need to take yourself out on dates. You need to do things for yourself. You need to feel amazing and wonderful and you need to strip yourself down of all your fears and become naked. You need to forget about past failures and learn from them.

But more importantly, you need to know exactly what you want going into that date, emotionally. Because when it comes down to dating, all it is is based on feelings. How did you feel at the end of a date? Most of us have never asked that question, because we always date based on wants, needs, and desires.

It’s time to change the way you date. It’s time to get naked.

I remember I went on an online date a couple years ago, this woman looked so great and amazing in her picture. Her profile described her as “fit and trim.”
Then when she showed up for the date, she was walking with a limp. This fit and trim athletic woman was walking towards me with a limp. And as she got closer, her shape got bigger and bigger. And pretty soon I realized that it wasn’t a limp she had, she was walking that way because she was carrying an extra ass with her.

She sat down to the table all nervous, fingernails bitten raw. The woman I saw in the picture looked glamorous. So I asked her, “How have you been?”
She said, “Man I’ve been really brutal lately. I’ve got this thyroid condition and I’ve just been putting on a lot of weight. I’m so sorry that I look this way. I really will get back to the way that I looked in those pictures, I swear I will.”

Meanwhile I’m thinking to myself, I’ve only known this woman for 15 seconds. This is going to be one of those half an hour dates where I pretend that someone texted me from the office and I’m going to go back.
So I said, “No, don’t worry about it, we all go through rough times. She said, “Rough times, you wouldn’t believe how this year’s been with my mother.” And then she went into this whole story about how her mother told her that she was gay. And how her mother now has a lesbian lover, her father got depressed and had a nervous breakdown. And she dumps all this on me in the first three minutes of our date.

So I start thinking to myself that would it actually be pretty rude to just check out and pretend I got a text from my office right now because I am terrified to know what the other 27 minutes are going to bring. So I did something which I think all of you should do.

When you have a crazy online date–and you will have crazy online dates–give the person a little bit of your time and attention and realize they might just need somebody to talk to. They might need an ear to listen to their stuff and unload on.

I like to be as nice as I possibly can. Why? Because I truly believe in karma, and I believe that being nice and authentic and amazing to people is the only way to treat people. You’re going to get brownie points in this world for doing that.

And then at the end of the date, look at her and say, “I’m so sorry, I’ve got to get back to the office. I really enjoyed talking to you and I wish you all the best.” It’ll make her feel good. She knows you’re not going to see her again. She’s done this on every date for the last probably three, four, five months.

You want to be the one who makes her feel good. Because you might run into her again. She might have a hot friend, and you don’t want to be the ass who basically blew her off on the day that she really needed to talk to somebody more than anything.

It’s about treating people with compassion. It’s about treating people the way you’d like to be treated. I hope you never go on a date and complain about your thyroid condition, how you’ve put on weight, and how depressed you are right now. But if you get that crazy date who unloads that on you, have a little compassion and you’ll see it will take you a long way.

What is the true definition of a stalker?

Ask yourself these questions:

• Do you find yourself calling people three, four, five times . . . even after they haven’t returned a phone call?

• How about the endless text messaging or emailing to someone even when there’s no responses to any of them?

There are many different ways that someone can be a stalker. There’s the scary Glenn Close type from “Fatal Attraction” who has a penchant for boiling bunny rabbits and jumping out of bathtubs. There’s the creepy ex against whom you have to get a restraining order to stop them from coming over to your house.

Then there is the form of stalker no one talks about. It’s usually the man or woman who doesn’t understand that when a person does not respond after the second phone message, text message or email, that the person is no longer interested.

I’m not very big into rules, but there is one by which I think everyone should abide: If you’ve left a few messages for someone and they haven’t called you back, then (borrowing from an old dating book) he’s (or she’s) just not that into you.

As Miranda on “Sex & The City” once told a group of women sitting on the library steps, if you leave a couple of messages for a man and he doesn’t call you back, he’s just not that into you. The problem is that they should have left it as a “Sex & The City” episode.

That book had one piece of good advice. The rest of it is annoying.

Plain and simple: If you’re a man who leaves a woman a few messages and she doesn’t call you back, you’re done.

If you text her several times and she doesn’t respond, you’re done. Technology didn’t stop working. Her fingers simply stopped responding to you.

If you email someone a few times and they don’t respond, you’re done. The spam filter that wasn’t there before did not just magically appear.

So now let’s get it right. The term is no longer “he (or she) is just not that into you.” The new term is “you’re done!” Finished. Done. End of the game – no two minute warning and no instant replay. You’re done.

Protect your dignity and walk away. You don’t want to be stalking the sidelines at the raving Tom Coughlin, nor do you want to look as confused on those sidelines as Wayne Fontes used to look when he coached the Detroit Lions.

You’re Done! Anything past a few messages, and you ARE a stalker. There are plenty of people to date. Don’t ever get caught harassing someone who does not want to date you.

Now repeat after me: If someone doesn’t call me back after several tries, I’m done. I’m as well done as a Jimmy Dean sausage from a Cracker Barrel roadside restaurant deep off I-95 in North Carolina.

I’d love to hear all of you share one of your stalker stories, whether you were the stalker or the one who was stalked.

Remember, it’s not necessarily negative if you’ve called someone once too often. We’ve all done it in our lives. So, share with us your favorite stalker or stalkee story.

Now you’re about to make one of the biggest decisions of your life. You’re in love with a fantastic woman. You think she’s the one.

You want her to move in, but you’ve heard stories from so many other people about how everything changes once you move in with someone. The truth is that this is one of the most fascinating times of your life.

I remember when I first lived with somebody. I was 23 or 24 years old, and it didn’t last longer than two weeks. At that time, I really wanted to just move in with someone. I wanted to be an adult. I wanted to say that I lived with my girlfriend.

It was no longer enough for me just to have the relationship or to have sleepovers. I wanted to live with my girlfriend. I wanted to experience that. Unfortunately it didn’t work out.

Since then, I have lived with quite a number of women. I can tell you that living with someone makes the relationship take on a whole different dynamic.

You’re no longer playing sleepover games, or having those great 11:00pm phone conversations that end with you going over there late at night for incredible sex. You’re now part of their life every single day. Every day.

You wake up next to them, you have dinner with them, you share the refrigerator with them, you go to sleep with them, you learn their habits, and you learn what TV shows they like to watch. It’s not like spending the weekend together or spending the night at someone’s house three nights a week.

You are with them all the time. Their friends are in your house. Their phone calls are in your house. Their television shows are in your house.

You no longer can have that great signed football picture of you and Peyton Manning that was taken during the Indianapolis Colts’ training camp as the centerpiece of your living room decor. You are now going to become a highly domesticated man.

When you are living with someone, rules change. Sex will change. It’s not going to be as exciting as it once was.

It’s very hard to recapture those first six months of a relationship (when you’re not living together) once you are living together. You’re going to have to learn to make efforts with each other, and to be more aware of each other’s feelings, emotions, needs and desires.

You need to know when the other needs space or needs alone time. You have to understand each other’s moods.

You also have to “report in” when you live together. If you’re not going to be home until late one night, you’ve got to tell that person. You are not longer living alone, and you have to realize that you now have someone who will worry about you so you have to keep them posted.

You are now in adulthood. You are now living and breathing and wanting to be with that person every single day. You are in that adult relationship, and this is one of the biggest parts of being an adult.

This whole dynamic of what you thought relationships were is going to change right before your eyes. You’re going to have to become a person who not only thinks of themselves, but who thinks about somebody else (and sometimes thinks of someone else before you think of yourself).

There will be a lot of change from when you were living separately. You’re going to have women come over to your house for “girls nights.” You’re going to come home and have to listen to a bunch of women talking about things you have no desire to hear.

So what you need to do is to develop your own personal “man cave.” This is something I have determined is absolutely necessary if you are going to move in with a woman. Make sure your house is big enough so that you can have a man cave to go to when you need to just be yourself (and need to be by yourself).

You need to have a place you can watch football, read ESPN on the Internet, and talk to your friends on the phone. You need to have a place you can decorate any way you want. You need to have personal space in order to make a relationship work.

Moving in together is a big step. Moving in together is exciting. Moving in together is a part of your future. What you need to realize, though, is that moving in also means that you need to know how to coexist .

You need to understand that this woman you know now is going to change in a lot of different ways. When you are comfortable with each other, you change.

You need to realize that romance is not going to be something you not only have to think about, but you might even have to (gasp!) have to take a day or two a week and plan it. When you live together, you tend to take people for granted. So remember all the amazing things that you had together when you were courting each other — remember all the great sex and the spontaneity.

If you can remember all that — and keep that when you’re living with them — then the relationship has a great chance of success. Give each other space, make sure there is enough romance, and make sure that you continue to develop the friendship. When you do fight, make sure you have a space to which you can go back. Welcome to a real, good, fun and challenging time of your life.

Of course you are in a relationship at this time in your life, and a really good relationship at that. It took a long time to find that really amazing woman. She’s your best friend. You have even uttered the word “soulmate.”

It is a great connection. The sex is great. It could be a little better; it’s not as hot as it was with that crazy woman you used to date (because in reality you never end up staying with the crazy woman).

The reason why sex is so great with crazy girls is because it has to be. Who would stay with them is the sex wasn’t great?

So you’re with somebody who could be a little edgier in bed, but you’re satisfied. You don’t need much gentleman time in the shower alone. She satisfies most of your needs and desires.

So you set up your best friend’s bachelor party. You don’t want to do the cliched stripper because your buddy, who has not really grown up at all, wants to have “one last night” with another woman.

This, by the way, is a big dilemma for you. If you set this up, you’ll know everything that happened at that bachelor party and you’ll have to deal with knowing that when you have “couples night” with him and his wife in the future. You’ll also have to lie to your girlfriend and say that nothing happened.

So here you are. You make the call. You tell them that you need a blond and a brunette. You didn’t check them out at all because you’re not so into this, and because you are happy in your own adult adolescence and your own relationship.

So you get to the bachelor party, and what happens? The stripper did everything that that crazy ex of yours used to do. She is like a reincarnation of your crazy ex.

It ignites this feeling within you. You almost feel like an animal again.

Then you make the biggest mistake you can make. You start talking to her and she’s really nice (because the crazy ones are always nice in the beginning).

You think to yourself, “I’m really connecting with her. She likes me.” Guys always do that with strippers. They always think that strippers like them.

I love when men say “she really likes me” to me. No, she likes what’s inside your wallet.

So the stripper keeps coming back to you because you’re the guy who organized the party. She keeps making sure that everyone is having fun. You think you’re connecting with her in certain ways.

Then it’s the end of the night. Everyone is happy. Your best friend did what he shouldn’t have done with the stripper. The stripper looks at you and says, “You know, I could take care of you too just as an added tip.”

What do you do in that situation? Do you cross the line?

Your friends are all passed out drunk because, of course, you did the cliched bachelor party and rented a room. All your friends are all laid out all around the room like a bad scene from the movie The Hangover. The only thing missing is Mike Tyson and the tiger.

The stripper looks at you and leads you to the bedroom, because these women know exactly what to do. She throws you down down on the bed and starts massaging you.

What do you do in this situation? Your friends are all passed out. Nobody’s going to know. Do you cross the line?

My advice is this: don’t cross it!

If you have an open, honest and great relationship then don’t lie to her. Once you cross that line in a relationship where you cheat and get away with it — whether it’s with a stripper or on a business trip — you have a whole new addiction coming your way.

We’re men. We like new conquests. Not only that but if this woman is better in bed than your woman, you’re going to re-ignite old feelings for every crazy woman you’ve ever slept with in your life.

Don’t cross the line. You need to learn how to say no.

I know how hard it’s going to be in that situation. She’s hot and she smells great. Every stripper seems to smell great. She tells you it’s a freebie because she’s hot for you and because she probably thinks she connected with you. I understand all of that, but don’t do it.

Don’t cross the line, because once you cross that line you’ll always cross that line. You’ll ruin what might be the best relationship of your life.

If you do cross that line, then you need to really explore a little deeper what your relationship is all about. She might actually be lacking things that you need.

I have no problem saying no. The times I have crossed the line in my life, I know exactly the reason why I did it. I wasn’t happy in my relationship, and it was a wake-up call.

You tell them that it’s the best sex of your life. She’s nurturing, loving and amazing.

Alright, maybe she loses it once in a while. Maybe when she drinks she has multiple personalities — not just one, but three or four. Maybe she’s just a little rambunctious and a little embarrassing at some of your office parties.

That’s all okay, though, because you wake up every Saturday morning and she does things sexually that no one else has ever done before. She wears skimpy little outfits around the house all the time. If you have a rough day, she completely caters to you.

Then one time you disagree with her and have a little bit of an argument in which you contradict yourself about something. So she decides to sneak into your emails and reads them. When you catch her, she tells you she won’t do it again and that she’ll “be a good girl” from now on. She even uses that terminology to make you feel like you’re the daddy — the man in control — and will say to you in a baby voice “Oh baby, I’ll never snoop again. This is the first time I ever snooped.”

I have heard that from these crazy women. The first time you’ve ever stooped? You’re 32 years old, and you just decided today for the first time that you were going to snoop?

These crazy women will lie. They’re never quite sure where they were during the day when you ask them. They manipulate.

If you don’t have enough sex with them, they will give you a play-by-play report of what they did that afternoon with their vibrator. You think it’s so cool. So you decide that you’re going to break the “man law” and date this woman.

The “man law” is that you have sex with the crazies and marry the great ones. You don’t marry the crazy ones, because that crazy woman is going to turn into the crazy mother of your children one day.

Despite the “man law,” you make the decision to date her because the sex is so addicting. It’s great getting hot text messages in the middle of the day when she decides to masturbate in her office while everyone was there.

You love this stuff. She’s crazy, she’s wild, she’s fun, but she’s insane. It’s probably like marrying Lindsay Lohan. You don’t marry these women though.

So now your best friend has come to you and told you not to do it. Don’t date this woman any more. Let me tell you what to do in this situation.

The crazy ones only get crazier with age. They don’t get more mellow. Your life will be a life of great sex, but emotional instability.

Just wait until she’s pregnant for nine months, and all the hormones are kicking in. Let me tell you, even the sane ones are insane when they’re pregnant. Wait until she feels fat after pregnancy and you make one comment asking her if she is going to lose the weight. See what happens then.

The crazy ones are great to have sex with, but don’t marry them. It’s almost like when you’re playing monopoly. You don’t want that get out of jail free card with the crazy ones, you want to stay in jail.

Enjoy the sex, but think to yourself, “How stable is this woman going to be with the kids? How stable is she going to be once I move my way up the corporate ladder and we actually win the trip to Hawaii? Do I really want my wife to be topless at the company pool? Do I want her hitting on the other women at the office party?”

It might be hot right now that she’s willing to do all these crazy things, including having her best friend over for a three-way. The problem is that if you marry this crazy woman you might lose out on a lot of other things in life — sanity, promotions and stability.

Take some advice from a friend of mine who once married one of these crazy women. You can’t just them — 50% of what you own (and then some) will be in their pocket. Crazy women are irrational, and if you try to divorce them they get even and they’ll take you for everything you’re worth.

Welcome to your life — the one where you need to choose between being with the sexual dynamo who is a crazy woman, and going out to find one who is just a little more mellow and a little more sane.

So you’re in a relationship, and you do any of the following things:

• After getting a little tipsy in a bar, you swap spit and play some serious tonsil hockey with the hottie with whom you did a few shots

• You go to a happy ending rub ‘n tug massage parlor and, Heavens to Betsy, the female rubber tugs at you at you at the end of the massage.

• You go to a strip club, and the stripper grinds against you leaving a deposit on your jeans.

• You’re a woman who at a bachelorette party slowly kisses this cute guy you met that night.

• You are on vacation, and you perform oral sex but don’t have intercourse.

So where am I going with all this? What defines cheating . . . and what actions do or do not constitute cheating?

Some people think cheating only occurs if intercourse happens. Other people think cheating is when you just think about it.

Some people say just making out with someone is not cheating. Ask any man who goes to a rub ‘n tug, and he’ll tell you that he’s not cheating. He’ll say that’s not cheating . . . it’s a massage.

So today, we’re going to open up the forum and see what you guys think. What is cheating to you?
That’s the question of the day.

I want to correspond with all of you. I want to hear your thoughts on what constitutes cheating.

I once had this funny little thing that read: “It’s not cheating if you do it in another time zone.” This meant that if you live in New York City and you travel to Los Angeles, it’s 8:00 pm. Los Angeles time and 11:00 pm. New York time. So you basically have three hours to fool around before it’s 11:00 pm your time.

It’s like time travel. If you keep your watch on eastern time, then it’s like you never cheated (sort of like the five second rule – something falls on the floor and you can eat it if it hasn’t been there longer than five seconds).

Instead of the “five second rule,” this is the “three hour rule.” Other people have a different version of this rule: “It’s not cheating if you don’t speak the language.”

People cheat for all sorts of reasons. Let’s hear your definition of what cheating is, and then another day we’ll talk about why people cheat.

I don’t agree with either of the rules above. You can rationalize it any way you want, but my opinion is that the minute your lips lock with another person, you’ve cheated.

What’s your opinion on this issue . . . and don’t hold back! Looking forward to this discussion all day!

As those of you who regularly follow the blog know, I’ve spent the past couple months apartment hunting. I’ve finally found a place, but damn, what a stressful, time-consuming experience it was. Add to that the fact that I live in New York City, so for every apartment offering that goes up, there are about 10 people searching and ready to jump on a good deal. The end of summer is a total zoo, it seems like everybody and their mother in New York is looking to move to a new place.

I looked at apartments all over the city, everywhere imaginable.  There were some good deals out there, there were some scams and dumps, there were hidden gems, and everything else in between.

I inquired about literally hundreds of apartments over the past few weeks, and looked at over 30 or 40 of them. I put in an application at a few places, had several credit checks, was accepted to every place, and I even laid down a deposit at two places.  Then I’d sleep on it or think about it for a few hours, and later on I would pull out with cold feet. I just couldn’t pull the trigger. Every time there was a place ready for the taking at my fingertips, I always hesitated. I couldn’t just say, “Yes, I’m taking it,” settle on a place, and have the search be done with.

Do You Desire To Be The Perfect Dream Couple?

Why not? Because, in the back of my mind, I had this image that there was some apartment in the city that had to be better than the one I was looking at right then and there. Or the apartment that I was looking at somehow wasn’t as good as the one I’d looked at a couple days ago.

So I’d envision myself living there, where the furniture would go, how I would cook dinners in the kitchen when I had someone over, how we would get up and take a shower, walk to the park, everything. Sure, it looked great but in my mind there was always a place that was just a little bit better than the place right in front of me.

Somewhere, I knew there was an apartment that would meet every specification I was looking for, the one place that was going to be perfect for my lifestyle. (As you know, lifestyle is what I teach, and having a quality lifestyle is essential to me.)

There was always a place with a little more square footage. In a slightly better location a couple blocks down. A block closer to the park. Closer to that cool corner coffee shop. 100 bucks a month cheaper. Slightly newer kitchen appliances. Slightly better water pressure, a little more cabinet space, an extra window with better lighting, better hardwood floors, a cooler-looking building, a little closer to the subway…you name it.

I spent so much time thinking it over, comparing and contrasting places, then at the end of the day I could never finally decide on a location. It really stressed me out. So I’d think it over for a night, then call up the landlord or the broker the next day with my mind made up. “Ok, I’ve decided! I’m taking the place at 101 Main Street! Done, let’s do this. When can I come sign the lease?”

“Oooh, sorry Shogo,” I’d hear, “Someone just came in this morning and signed the lease on it… Tough luck. But I’ve got another place I can show you…”  Of course that new place would then be not nearly as good as 101 Main Street.

The fact is there is no perfect apartment. For everything that was better about the next apartment I would look at, there was always something worse about it than the prior apartments. Sure, this place has a great outdoor terrace that the one I looked at yesterday didn’t have. But it’s eleven blocks away from the cool part of town. This place has brand new kitchen appliances. But no bathtub. An extra room for a home office? Sure, but it’s a 6-floor walkup.

There really is no perfection in life. It’s a lesson I’m still learning. There is no such thing as the perfect house, and in all my experiences dating I can tell you that there is no such thing as the perfect person.

Are you in a relationship, or are you dating right now, and you’re still looking around for someone better than the person you’re seeing? Someone who’s a little better looking, maybe a little smarter, a little more popular, in a little better shape? Are you saving yourself up for that special, perfect person? Are you kind of just going through the motions right now, secretly hoping for him or her to come across your path? And if you do encounter that person, will you be able to seize the moment and act on it?

You may come across that perfect person.  But you night not.  You might be waiting for a long, long time.  And before you know it, you may have missed an opportunity with that great person right in front of you.

Today I’d like you to go out and appreciate another person. If you’re single, go out and start a friendly conversation with someone new, whether you’re attracted to them or not, it doesn’t matter. Really listen to that person and be interested in what they’re all about. And if you’re in a relationship or you’re dating somebody, I want you to look at and appreciate them, even though he or she may not be the perfect person in the world. Maybe he’s not as tall as you’d like, maybe she’s got a couple extra pounds on her. Maybe he talks a little too much about himself, maybe she’s more judgmental than you’d like her to be, whatever it is.

You may come across someone who’s a better match for you down the road, and it’s ok to keep your options open if that’s what you want. But really take some time today to appreciate and enjoy that imperfect person who is right in front of you.

In responding to the survey, one subscriber wrote a great statement:

Whenever I successfully have a girlfriend, it never goes over two months. I am looking for a relationship for a long time and to learn about love.

Getting a girlfriend is really only part of the equation. Learning how to have a meaningful relationship is the whole thing. I have said this to guys so many times, and to women as well. But especially men who are in this situation. So many men spend so much time learning the skills on how to approach women, how to meet women, talk to them and get a phone number, but spend virtually no time at all learning how to have a relationship. That’s where all the work comes in.

All the work comes in when you have a relationship with someone. Eventually, every person will meet a partner. As my good friend in the car business said, “There is an ass for every seat”

I truly believe that there is a person out there for everybody. What I have found in all my years of coaching is that most people don’t prepare themselves for when that relationship happens down the road. To me, that part is huge.

I have said that in blogs so many times before. When I talk about relationship advice, some people will inevitably say, “Oh man, David, why are you writing this? We are here to meet people so we can go on dates, not listen to you talk about relationships with the opposite sex.”

Really? Because if you are not looking at the complete picture, what happens when you finally do meet somebody? You don’t know how to have a relationship with them. You don’t understand what romance is, and you don’t understand how to keep them intrigued. You don’t understand exactly what it means to be needy or desperate, is the best way to put it.

You’ll continue to get into a relationship for a month or two months, then blow it. Then get in another relationship for a month or two, then blow it again. You only understand how to keep them for two months because your partner loses interest in you right away. Why? Because you don’t know how to cultivate the relationship and make it a romantic journey for the both of you.

Here’s a plug for a product, guys. Check out this relationship product I have. It takes you through the first 90 days of a relationship. The crucial first 90 days. I don’t care if you’re not in a relationship right now, I don’t even care if you can’t even approach people right now.

You have got to be prepared in all aspects of your life: physically, emotionally, and sexually. Because if you are not, then you are just going to blow chance after chance after chance and be like the guy above.