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Archive for the ‘Fashion & Style (Men)’ Category |
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Monday, July 6th, 2009
As most of you know, I don’t really drink. So I didn’t wake up this morning with an alcohol-related hangover, but I did wake up this morning with a holiday weekend hangover.
You take six days off work, and when you wake up the first morning you’re going back to work you are pissed. You’re pissed not because you’re going back to work, but because you’re just not ready for the barrage of emails, that first stupid question of the day . . . or even for oatmeal. That is what I call the holiday weekend hangover.
All of us know exactly how this feels. It’s the worst kind of feeling in the world, especially for people in this country who don’t get enough vacation time. Can you imagine how it is in Europe? How does that holiday hangover feel after being off of work for the entire month of August?
It’s really not fun. I’ll tell you, though, at least you’re in one piece and an affair didn’t bite you in the ass.
When are professional athletes, actors and politicians going to get it? What do they need to get a wakeup call? How many more of them have to die with their dicks in their hand to finally realize, “Hmmm…I’m a high profile person, so maybe I shouldn’t be cheating on my wife with a hot-tempered 20 year old.”
I was a huge Steve McNair fan. He was a battler and a competitor. He did great things for the community. Hanging out with a woman from Dave & Busters when you have four kids, however, isn’t a great move.
They are calling his death a homicide. They are not calling Sahel Kazemi’s death a homicide. Hmmm, can we put the pieces together ourselves? We’ll wait for the Nashville Police Department to tell us it was a murder-suicide.
It just really bothers me, the idea of someone deciding they have the power to take someone’s life. I’m not going to sit here and talk about handgun control, when really it could be as simple as penis control.
Cheating can kill you. Forget smoking. I’ve said it before and I’ve said it many times: If you’re not happy in a relationship, man up before you go sticking your penis in another woman’s volatile vagina.
We’ve all heard about women being scorned and seen enough of them get even. How many penises need to be bitten off, and how many men need to be blackmailed or murdered, before you realize that cheating doesn’t pay.
Now, don’t even get me started this morning on prescription drugs. Gee, I think I’m going to take a drug so powerful that when most humans take it they have an anesthesiologist administer it. What are some people thinking?
The world lost two very unique people who made some stupid decisions. I believe everything has a lesson. Learn from these lessons.
Maybe you’re not popping highly addictive pharmaceutical drugs, but maybe you have some other vice that’s slowly killing you. Maybe you’re in a relationship that’s not working and you’re thinking about sticking your penis elsewhere.
Pay attention to the deaths of Michael Jackson and Steve McNair. So many people think these kind of things can never happen to them. I’m sure Michael Jackson and Steve McNair did not imagine their outcomes.
Today’s message, if you don’t already know what it is, is to pay attention to the warning signs and to stop thinking you’re invincible. It could be as simple as to stop texting while you’re driving, because let me assure you that you will eventually get into an accident if you don’t.
It could be your attitude toward alcohol. You might think, “It’s just wine” but have you ever heard the term “wino?” You might be cheating and think she’ll never find out, but you never know what kind of woman you’re cheating with and what she might do.
So, once again, this holiday weekend hangover is brutal! Does anyone got a prescription for it?
Tags: cheating on spouse, cheating on wife, dating advice for men, dating advice for women, david wygant, extramarital affairs, hangover, Michael Jackson, Nashville Police Department, Sahel Kazemi, Steve McNair, Steve McNair murder
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, Dating Etiquette, Divorce, Fashion & Style (Men), Fashion & Style (Women), Goals & Aspirations, How To Ask For A Date, How To Be A Better Communicator | 20 Comments »
Sunday, July 5th, 2009
It only took ten minutes yesterday to spot them. They were all over the place. Everywhere we went, giddy voices were screaming, “We found it!”
The men’s voices were slurred, and the women’s voices sounded like drunk Paris Hiltons. Every place we went and every party we passed, the drunken men would scream to their drunken mates “We found the party!” while the women would scream in excitement.
Watching these sub-species of humans, I kept waiting to see them do something. I felt like I was at a people zoo.
So they finally felt found the party? You’d think they’d tell other people. Not these people. Once they found they found the party, they also found their spot.
It seems that people are very territorial. Once they find their spot at a party, they will do anything not to leave it.
It’s amazing. You can’t move them. You can’t even get by them once they’ve found their spot. So you literally have to pretend you’re at a human zoo and just watch the interaction of the species.
You’d figure with all the excitement, something would happen other than territorial instincts. Do you know what actually does end up happening? What ends up happening is exactly what I said in yesterday’s blog, i.e., NOTHING.
That is, nothing except that this species begins to get a little disappointed. The over-the-top energy energy of elation always ends up leading to a pack member tugging at another one’s arm and convincing them that it’s time to go and find the other party of the year.
The funny thing is that the people we saw bop around the daytime parties, were the same people we saw moaning at fireworks at night. It’s exactly what I described in yesterday’s blog, i.e., you all finally made it to the party of the year but forgot to talk to people.
It’s amazing to watch this. The expectations of the 4th of July will bite you in the ass every time.
The great thing about it is that now you can just enjoy the rest of your summer, because now you don’t have the “BBQ” (the bigger, better barbecue) expectations . . . at least until Labor Day rolls around.
After Labor Day, this feeling won’t come up again until Halloween. So now is the time to kick this habit. Stop the mentality that you’ll meet your great love at that one great party. It’s over.
If you can relate to this behavior, then you need to know that nothing will change until you do the work. It’s not the party that’s the problem, it’s you.
Wherever I go there’s a party. I don’t need the 4th of July to find one. That’s the way I live my life, and it’s the same way you need to live yours.
So if you can relate to this, it’s time to invest in something other than drinking to meet people. Try my Men’s Mastery Series or my Women’s Mastery Series. Call it a good wakeup call.
Enjoy the 5th of July, because the party is everywhere.
Tags: 4th of July, 4th Of July Barbecues, 4th of July parties, dating advice for men, dating advice for women, david wygant, halloween, Labor Day, paris hilton
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, Dating Etiquette, Divorce, Fashion & Style (Men) | 7 Comments »
Saturday, July 4th, 2009
There’s a woman I know who every 4th of July really thinks that if she gets the right spray tan and hits the right party, that she might finally meet the right man. This woman cruises every party. She meets some really interesting people, but even at her advanced age she just can’t seem to get it right.
Maybe it’s all the lingering issues this woman has in her head. Maybe it’s all her excuses that’s holding her back. If she could just along with others, then maybe life would be better. If this damn recession wasn’t happening, then maybe people would feel better about her.
Then there’s all the constant bickering she has with Iran, Iraq and North Korea. I mean, really, at this advanced age don’t you think she would have known that picking fights and taunting and teasing people doesn’t work? Don’t you think her mother would have taught her how to embrace her enemies?
You’d think on this day — her birthday — she’d be more reflective. I mean, 233 years old and still making the same mistakes!
233 years old and she’s still not meeting the right people at the right parties. Do you know why? It’s because people like you and I are running the place.
People make mistakes. So the next time you get pissed at the government, about a war, or about whatever it is about the country that upsets you, realize that it’s just people making the wrong choices and decisions. It’s no different than you walking up to the wrong person at the 4th of July party.
If today when you’re at the 4th Of July barbecue the woman you want to meet doesn’t talk to you, are you going to create a war? If that woman doesn’t talk to you, are you going to blame the recession?
If a man doesn’t approach you today even with your beautiful spray tan, the ten pounds you’ve lost and with you looking great in your bathing suit, are you going to think he’s hiding nuclear weapons? If he is, you may want to find out quickly, because who knows what kind of 4th of July orgasm he can bring.
So today when you’re watching the fireworks and searching for a great party, cut yourself some slack. Our beautiful lady is turning 233 years old today and she still screws up, and I guarantee you will too.
You will leave one barbecue to search out a bigger, better barbecue. Then the next day you’ll hear how the barbecue you left turned out to be THE barbecue of the summer. You missed that barbecue because you left to go hang out at the summit.
I guarantee that today one of your friends will become too drunk and will get annoying. You will get hounded by someone who will tell you their name no less than seven times. Someone will fart in the middle of the party and you’ll have to embrace the fumes.
Today when you’re searching for perfection, realize that the country you live in is far from perfect . . . and that is what makes it such a great place to live. So have fun today at whatever party you attend. Stop searching for the perfect 4th of July. Cut yourself some slack and relax. You’ll have a much better time!
Today we’re going to an imperfect party with imperfect cooks, and we’re going to have a great time. The truth is that this great country turning 233 years old today cannot control the way your life is; only you can control that.
So Happy Birthday America! Also, remember, don’t look for the BBQ, i.e., the “bigger, better barbecue,” because when you wake up I guarantee you’ll find out you missed the best party.
They say “love the one you’re with.” I say love the party you’re at . . . cause it’s all you’ve got!
Tags: 4th of July, 4th Of July Barbecues, America, America's birthday, dating advice for men, dating advice for women, david wygant, Independence Day, Love The One You're With
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, Dating Etiquette, Divorce, Fashion & Style (Men), How To Ask For A Date | 7 Comments »
Tuesday, June 30th, 2009
I said you wanna be startin’ somethin’
You got to be startin’ somethin’
I said you wanna be startin’ somethin’
You got to be startin’ somethin’
…..ooh, ooh, ooh, yeah, yeah…
You GOT to be startin’ somethin’. Sing it like Michael Jackson sang it (obviously I don’t remember all the words!) Half the year is over today, so really you got to be starting something.
Tonight is the night before my birthday, and all through the blog not a creature was stirring . . . not even a whale (well, since it’s summer I figured I should pick a creature that swims).
But anyway, it’s June 30th, so let’s talk about whether YOU got to be starting something. Are you where you thought you’d be with all your New Year’s resolutions? If not, then you’ve got half a year left to make them happen.
So let’s all think about startin’ somethin’ . . . ya ya . . . Oh, wait, that’s actually the Secrets Of The Ya-Ya Sisterhood (a movie, not a song). Anyway, sing Michael’s song today and let’s move on to today’s blog topic — which happens to be about singing your life.
People are always asking me how I’m in such a good mood all of the time. I’m always in a good mood. I feel good from the second I wake up until the second I fall asleep.
How do I do it? I spend my entire day singing through life.
I’m not necessarily walking around singing a song all day long. To me, though, life is literally like a song. I’m basically singing all day long.
When I wake up, I’m always feeling really goofy. I’ll wake up with some ridiculous song in my head, like “Bicycle” by Queen. I’ll be making breakfast in the kitchen and in my head I’ll be singing the lyrics “Bicycle, bicycle… I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bike…”
I don’t even know all the words, but by doing that I start laughing and cracking myself up. I begin to have a good time.
That is what life is all about. Life is all about having a good time. You should always be singing.
So really think about having different soundtracks going through your head all of the time. Perhaps you get a song stuck in your head that you hear while you’re driving. Sing that song to yourself.
Let yourself go! Most of us walk around like we have a stick so far up our ass. Now what kind of song do you think that would inspire?
Just let it go! Don’t be so serious. Sing the day away.
If you can sing your day away, people will want to be with you. It’s like you’re creating your own concert and the rest of the world is your giant mosh pit. All they will want to do is carry you around all day long.
Start singing!
Tags: birthdays, dating advice for men, dating advice for women, david wygant, Michael Jackson, Secrets Of The Ya-Ya Sisterhood, Twas The Night Before Christmas, You Got To Be Startin' Somethin'
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, Dating Etiquette, Divorce, Fashion & Style (Men), How To Ask For A Date | 26 Comments »
Friday, June 19th, 2009
This morning I was thinking to myself, “It’s the end of June. You know what that means — prom season.” Now, I know that prom season is earlier nowadays, but my prom was at the end of June (so I always think of that time of the year as prom season).
Think how much fun this would be. You go and buy a corsage for your woman. You make her buy a dress from Forever 21 (as all the dresses from there look like prom dresses). You rent a really bad tux . . . and you crash a prom.
Forget about wedding crashers, I want to be a prom crasher. How much fun would it be to go dance the night away to a really bad 80s cover band?
You could be the one who brings the booze (because you’re the only one there who can legally buy alcohol), and you could spike the punch. Just think what a hero you would be at your prom.
For those of you who had a bad prom experience, this could be your chance at redemption. If you were the guy in the corner who was sitting there basically miserable, or if you were the girl who didn’t get asked to dance, then think about the instant popularity you’d garner by being the one who brings the booze and spikes the punch.
You are going to finally be popular! All the kids are going to look at you say, “Dude, you are so cool!” You will be the “it” person at the prom.
You’ll get to dance with the prom queen (or king). Your date is going to get so turned on, because it’s going to take them back to high school and they’re going to realize that they are with the cool person who spiked the punch.
How much fun would this all be? I know most of you saw the movie Wedding Crashers which was really funny, but prom crashing brings back a lot of memories with it.
You can rent a cheesy limousine, and pick up your date in it. Then, after the prom, you can invite everybody back to your house and party.
Even more fun than that, why not bring your date back to your parents’ house. Your parents will be sitting there watching television, and when you come in they’ll say “You kids can go down to the basement as long as you leave the lights on.”
Did it really matter if the lights were on or not? I remember my parents would always give me the “as long as the lights are on” stipulation. You could of course still hump with the lights on. Parent mindset is so funny. It’s like they think to themselves, “We’re parents. We’ve been having sex for the last eighteen years. We’re not attracted to each other anymore, and we turn the lights off so we don’t have to see each other.”
That’s how parents are. They forget about the fun days when a naked body was something amazing to look at, and you actually wanted to see your partner naked. They forget what it’s like to look at someone and marvel at how good they look naked. Parents think that if you leave the lights on, then nothing sexual is going to happen.
Actually Motel 6 leaves the light on, too, so if you have a little extra cash at the end of your prom date you can take your date to the Motel 6. Motel 6 also probably thinks that nothing sexual happens there, because who the hell would have sex on those rough sheets?
Anyway, how much fun would that be to re-live your prom? What a great date idea.
Now, I wouldn’t suggest you go to the prom by yourself to try and meet people, because then you look like “Chester, Chester The Child Molester.” You don’t go to a prom looking for dates, unless of course you’re one of my young readers (I’ve got a lot of guys reading this blog who are 17 and 18 years old). If that’s you, then why not put on a tux and go crash a prom?
Just think if you did that. All the kids would be trying to place who you are. People would be whispering, “Is that Joe who dropped out? Oh my God, we haven’t seen him since 9th grade!”
Now, if I can just convince my girlfriend how much fun it would be for her to put on that awful dress again, for me to put on my awful tuxedo and for us to actually go and crash a prom. Anybody want to join?
Tags: date ideas, dating advice for men, dating advice for women, david wygant, great date ideas, Motel 6, prom
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, Dating Etiquette, Divorce, Fashion & Style (Men), Goals & Aspirations, How To Ask For A Date | 9 Comments »
Saturday, June 13th, 2009
Last night was one of the most exciting nights I’ve ever had in my life. You’re not going to believe what happened to me.
I bowled a 205!
I know what you’re thinking right now. I have a herniated disc. Is that what it takes to bowl a 205 — to herniate your disc and be put on steroids?
Before you think I spent last night at a bowling alley drinking beer and hanging out in a room full of guys wearing wifebeaters, let me set you straight. I was bowling on a Nintendo Wii.
It was the first time I’d used it. My girlfriend got it for me for Christmas, and it took me six months to get it set up.
According to her, I apparently said sometime I didn’t want that present (although I don’t remember ever saying that). So with my birthday coming up in a few weeks, I figured I’d better get the Christmas present set up before the birthday presents arrived.
Last night my girlfriend thought I didn’t want my birthday surprise, because when we had been walking by a jewelry store I said I didn’t want a money clip we saw in the window. I had the wrong surprise, though, and so now I am walking around all day saying “I want the money clip! I want the money clip!”
Also, before I forget, I need to thank Todd from the blog for the iPhone. Todd and I made a trade. Todd is giving me his old iPhone and I hooked him up with some great stuff.
I still, however, need one more iPhone . . . because it wouldn’t be fair if Daphne didn’t have one too. So I need one. I am willing to do potentially a lot to get it, except switch to AT&T. I really don’t need any rollover minutes; I prefer to roll over in bed.
So here’s the deal. If you have an old iPhone, let’s make a deal! I will be posting the fact that I need an iPhone on the blog until I get one. Need a date? Let’s make a deal. Maybe I’ll let you borrow Daphne for a month to serve as your constant prop and girl-attracting conversation starter. You never know . . . let’s make a deal!
Today’s blog stemmed from something I was thinking about as I was on the beach the morning with Daphne. I got up at 7:45 am this morning because one of Sonja’s instructors at her studio didn’t show up and she had to go fill in and teach the class.
So I got up this Saturday June morning with a Boom Boom in my eye (oops, that’s The Sopranos). As I stood on the beach with summer just about here, I decided to talk about something that is really going to make you think.
It’s going to be short and to the point. I’m going to get you to think about whether you suffer from weekend expectations . . . and, specifically, summer weekend expectations.
Now that it’s summer, are you putting all your eggs in one beach basket? Do you have summer weekend expectations?
Summer is about 90 days long. Are you one of those people who worked really hard to take off a few pounds so that you would look good for the summer? Did you do that because you thought that summer was the season you’d be able to meet someone?
Do you think that every summer occasion is a potential watershed moment in your dating life? Every barbecue, beach party and picnic is potentially THE one you are going to have that life-transforming moment? Do you make summer vacation plans with the same thoughts in your head?
The truth is that summer does not change your mindset. You were brainwashed as a kid. Summer would start, signaling the end of multiplication tables and the beginning of playing kick the can until 9:00 every night. Some of us spoiled kids got to go to summer camp and play with other spoiled kids all day and all night.
Really, though, summer is not like when we were kids. It’s no longer about the expectation of our first kiss and playing day and night, because as kids we didn’t have all the adult fears and excuses.
I’m not trying to poo-poo your summer. I’m trying to give you a little reality here.
Just because it’s summer doesn’t mean your belief system has changed. It’s not like the thermometer automatically warms up your mindset or your attitude. You still have your same shit. It doesn’t just “go away” with the changing of the seasons.
So if you think that summer is going to magically change how you look at things and how things are done, then you need to look at the inside instead of the outside. The beliefs you hold are all on the inside, and they come with you to every barbecue, beach party and picnic.
Personally I miss summer as a kid. I had my first girlfriend in the summer. She was one of my first crushes. She had the coolest name too: Summer. I dated Summer in the summer. I called her “my Double Summer.”
Back to the present and it’s “June Gloom” time of the year here in Los Angeles. I live on a beach and can’t swim in the ocean because it’s polluted.
Do you know what though? It’s always summer in my mind, and I’m always enjoying my life. I don’t need a five day forecast or to be invited to the coolest barbecue, because the party is always going on in my mind and life is always amazing.
Have a great June Saturday!
Oh, and one more thing. The new iPhones come out any day now. So remember to get in touch with me if you want to part with your old one!
Tags: barbecues, birthday gifts in relationships, birthdays, dating advice for men, dating advice for women, david wygant, Goals & Aspirations, summer, summer barbecues, summer camp, summer memories
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, Dating Etiquette, Divorce, Fashion & Style (Men), Goals & Aspirations | 31 Comments »
Saturday, May 30th, 2009
Today is Saturday, May 30th, and I will be celebrating the birthday of the woman I love. It’s funny about birthdays.
I really don’t like mine, due to the fact that I always have the attitude that it is just another day. When it comes to making birthdays special for someone you love, however, that’s when the fun starts.
You get to shop for some presents and scatter them around the house, so they will have things to open all day long. You get to plan a fun dinner, and plan some great birthday surprises for after dinner.
I like doing the surprising better than being the one surprised. So today I will be laying out the surprises.
As one of my first surprises for her, I’d like to write a little note here to Sonja…
Sonja — As you know this whole day was and is about spoiling you. So, look at this as my birthday blog to you. As you know, I never write a blog as an open letter to any one person, but how would it look if I did not wish the woman I love huge birthday wishes on my blog? 
Now, let’s not get all crazy. I am not making this into a “Tom Cruise jumps on Oprah’s couch” moment . . . but then again that moment gave him a ton of press publicity, so maybe I should give Oprah a ring and ask if I can jump on her couch and wish Sonja a happy birthday.
For now (and until I am able to arrange my couch jumping Oprah appearance), what I want to hear from all of you today is how you feel about birthdays.
Do you like your birthday, or do you just treat it like any other day?
What was your favorite birthday, and what did you do to celebrate it?
Which birthday made you think about something really deep and profound?
So Happy Birthday to Sonja, and to anyone else who shares a May 30th birthday with my girl!
Tags: birthday celebrations, birthday memories, birthday surprises, birthdays, celebrating birthdays, david wygant, favorite birthdays, happy birthday, how to celebrate your birthday, tom cruise
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, Dating Etiquette, Divorce, Fashion & Style (Men), Fashion & Style (Women), Goals & Aspirations, How To Be A Better Communicator | 20 Comments »
Monday, May 25th, 2009
It’s Memorial Day. It’s the day everyone is outside having fun, and it’s the first three day weekend of the summer.
How will I remember this Memorial Day? I will remember it as hopefully the last time I am ever stubborn. Tomorrow, I am going to share a very personal blog and story with you and tell you more about that!
A great way to begin this unofficial start to the summer is with setting some goals for yourself . . . and then actually sticking with them. What are your goals for the summer?
Before you know it, summer will have come and gone. It always seems to go so quickly!
So today, let’s write down our goals and hold ourselves accountable. As I always say, if you write it down there’s proof and you’re committed to it.
Enjoy Memorial Day!
Tags: beer, goal setting, goals, memorial day
Posted in Attract and Approach Women, Dating Etiquette, Divorce, Fashion & Style (Men) | 9 Comments »
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