Let me tell you about Henry and why he’s become so powerful.

Henry came to me about a year ago.  He took my New York City boot camp in May of 2011.

When I met Henry for the very first time, he was extremely shy.  39 years old and trapped inside his mind.  He so desperately wanted to meet a great woman, to get married and be happy.

He spent his life emotionally tortured by the fear of not being able to connect with women.  When I say that Henry was shy, I mean really really shy.

Then Henry took the boot camp.  He went through a lot of transformation at the boot camp.  He learned about what being a man is all about.  But he also understood that this was not the magic cure.  He needed to work on himself even more.

Henry spent the next eight months listening to my Men’s Mastery Series every single day and going out and doing the exercises every single day.

Henry took all the lessons he learned at the boot camp and started implementing them in his life.

When I first met Henry at the boot camp, and even when he left, he was a quiet guy, still in his head.  But I saw a potential in him and I told him that if he works on everything every single day, the world’s going to finally see the Henry that’s been lying deep beneath the surface.

Henry came back to our boot camp in February of this year.  (Anybody who comes to a David Wygant boot camp can come back for free anytime they want.)

Henry came back and the minute I saw him, I saw a whole different Henry.

His smile, the way he walked with confidence, the way he spoke, his vocal tone—everything about him was different.

We do roleplaying at the beginning of each boot camp, and Henry sat across from the woman and charmed her, being himself, the Henry that was locked inside for so long.

I was amazed.

I was happy.

I just wanted to hug him afterwards.

The whole weekend, Henry was social, confident, secure, and charming. By Sunday, the last day of the camp, Henry even snagged himself a date. I looked at him on Sunday afternoon, and I said Henry, your transformation has been unreal.  I am so proud of everything about you.

Henry looked at me and smiled and called me his Sansei.  I felt like I was Mr. Miyagi in The Karate Kid.

Henry came to my New York City Art of Communication seminar last weekend, and I once again saw a huge transformation in him.

I saw a whole different Henry.

We had this cool woman named Sarah who did role-playing with us. Henry got real and authentic with her.

I later asked Sarah what she thought about Henry. She looked at me and said, “What he just told me was one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever heard. I wish all guys could say that to me.”

What did Henry say?

You’ll need to ask him if you really want to know.

Henry is now the man that he always wanted to be.

It’s powerful to watch transformations like this. It makes me feel unreal inside.

For those of you that want to know even more, feel free to e-mail me and I will send you Henry’s e-mail address, and he’d be more than willing to share.

Transformation and growth—what life is all about.

It’s 2012! Brand new everything. (Okay, I promise that once March hits, I’m going to stop talking about 2012. Maybe.)

If you’re reading this on DavidWygant.com, then you’ve probably recognized our brand new design. I personally love it. It’s easier to navigate, and it puts emphasis on our Women’s site in the header. (We have a lot of awesome stuff in store for the women in our audience this year.)

Feel free to click around and browse the new site.

And please, let me know what you think in the comments section below! Your feedback is always considered.

Have an awesome…day.

I was sitting around this morning and I realized something that really hit me like a ton of bricks: we’re all looking for our soulmates out there.  Everyday millions of people are going out on dates hoping and praying that they’ve met “the one” or their soulmate.  Everyday people are logging into online dating sites hoping that the new e-mail is from their soulmate.

We’ve been doing it wrong for so long.  Do you want to know where your soulmate really is?  Are you willing to join me on a journey to help you discover your soulmate? If the answer is yes, which I know it is, I want you to do something right now.  I want you to go into your bathroom or find the closest mirror. Maybe you’re reading this at work, maybe you’re reading this in the car while you’re driving. (You know that’s not allowed but hey, I’ve seen people do it constantly while living here in Los Angeles.)

Wherever you might are right now, I want you to go find the nearest mirror, and I want you to look at it, and I want you to come back and read the rest of this article.

. . .

. . .

. . .

Great.

What did you see when you looked in the mirror?  I know your answer is probably simply yourself or maybe your eyes or your nose or your hair, or maybe you’re not having a good hair day so you noticed that you need to get a new conditioner.  That’s not what I was looking for.  I want you to go look in the mirror one more time, and then I want you to come back and read some more.

. . .

Okay.  Now what did you see? I’m sure by now you’re confused, and you just want to go and skim down a few lines and see what I’m getting at.  Why is he making me looking in the mirror right now?  Why is he telling me to look in mirror?

You know why I want you to look in the mirror, because you just saw your soulmate.  You just saw the person you’re supposed to be madly in love with.  You just saw the person you’re supposed to connect with and honor in all ways.  You just saw the person that you’re supposed to nurture and take care of.  You just saw the person that you’re supposed to love unconditionally in every way, shape, or form.

You just found your soulmate.  Life is all about loving yourself and finding yourself.  It’s not about filling in the gaps.  It’s not about searching for that potential person that’s going to save you from a life of being alone.  It’s about loving yourself.  It’s about realizing that the person staring back at you in the mirror is your soulmate.  Once you fall madly in love with yourself, once you realize the power of this message, dating is going to become far easier because you’re already satisfied on so many levels.

Think about this for a second: if you would treat your lover with honor, with respect; if you would take your lover out to dinner; if you would go to great events with your lover; if you would travel with your lover—then that’s what you need to do with yourself.

If you do this you’re going to attract your other soulmate. You’re going to attract your other half, another person that loves and honors and respects themselves.

So go back to that mirror, and look at the beautiful person that’s staring back at you, and tell yourself that you finally found your soulmate. Try that attitude change for a bit, and see how it changes your dating life. My book Naked! is all about this, falling in love with yourself, so you’re able to fall in love with others.

I was watching a movie the other night called “Hall Pass” with Owen Wilson and Jason Sedakis. It was a Farrely brothers movie which I did not realize until, during the course of the movie, all these ridiculously hilarious scenes based on the stupidest things in the entire world weer scattered throughout the movie.

But I’ve got to say, it’s really a fun, good movie. Definitely a dude’s movie, not a chick flick at all.
So there was a pretty funny scene in the movie where they’re sitting around, talking, playing poker, basically they’re doing total guy things. They’re going around the table asking things like, “How much would you spend if you could have one night with a Hawaiian Tropic model and your wife would never find out?” And they were arguing about bidding on it. $3,000, $4,000, $5,000?

Guys sometimes do the stupidest things like that. Like that would ever happen, like a Hawaiian Tropic model would hang out with you for a night and basically have you pay them for their company.
Who cares, you and your friends are never going to bid and win a night with a Hawaiian tropic model in the first place. Hawaiian tropic models . . . Who wants a Hawaiian Tropic model, anyway? You’ve got to think about the career goals of a woman who decides that her lifelong dream and profession is to be a Hawaiian Tropic model.

Another funny thing that men do all the time that I think is just ridiculous is when they sit around and then start doing the Who would you rather bang? game.
“Who would you rather bang, Mila Kunis or Scarlett Johanssen?” Scarlett.
Then you’ll go, “Ok, Mila Kunis or Jennifer Aniston?” Hmmm…Mila Kunis.

And you’ll go through all the celebrities. Cameron Diaz or Angelina Jolie? And you’ll sit there and have that conversation for about a half hour, and then you’ll argue about why Mila Kunis would be a much better lay than Jennifer Aniston or Scarlett Johanssen.

The thing is, if any of those women were every standing in front of you, you’d bang any of them in a heartbeat. Let’s get real. Secondly, you’re never going to be standing in a line at a market, coffee shop, or movie line with them behind you, where you can look at them and say, “Excuse me, I had a conversation with my nerdy friends the other day and I decided I would rather bang you, Mila, than you, Scarlett.”

In reality, your only debate is who you will be masturbating to that night. Mila or Scarlett…hmmm which one does your hand want to please yourself thinking of?

I mean, it is the stupidest game in the entire world. You might as well play this game and make it more realistic: Challenge each other. Say hey, would you rather bang the Nordstrom’s counter girl, the Sephora perfume girl, or the barista at Starbucks? Play that game and then challenge one another to go and see who can get a date with the barista or the Nordstrom’s girl. Be a little productive in your conversation instead of acting like a bunch of nerdy lunatics.

All right, so here’s my question of the day to you: Who would you rather bang, Mila Kunis or Scarlett Johanssen?
Got you, huh? Let’s see how many people actually answer.

Sirius radio is great because you can just scroll right over the display and it gives you the name of the music that’s playing and the year. And while I scrolled over the song, I realized that With or Without You was a song that came out in 1987.

I remember listening to that song, I was 25 at the time and I had either just gotten broken up with or I had met somebody I really liked and it didn’t work out. I remember thinking to myself, “God, With or Without You, yeah, that’s right, I can make it with or without her. I can survive.”

And then I started thinking to myself what my 20s were like.

So many emotions all the time. When I thought I really liked a woman and she didn’t call me back, I’d freak out for a day or two. I’d go through streaks where I was really good at meeting women and then streaks where I wasn’t.

Why was this happening to me? This is why: I didn’t know who I was.

I was unemployed at certain times, I’d lose jobs for no reason at all – at least I thought it was for no reason at all. But the reason was because I had an attitude problem, but at the time I didn’t think I did.

And I remember that so much of my 20s I’d spent with or without all the things that I thought I needed at the time. It was with or without money: times I had money and there were times I didn’t. With or without women: there were times I had them in my life and there were times that I didn’t.

And every time I didn’t have something in my life I kept saying to myself, “Things are going to be much better when I get more money, things are going to be better when I have more women in my life.”
All the while, I could never be content where I was. I always thought I needed something else, but I didn’t realize the beauty of what the whole journey was all about. The whole span of my 20s was like this. And the beautiful thing about it, and the most amazing thing about it, was I was never going to get those days back again.

Each one of those days was a memory. Yet I didn’t fully embrace or fully enjoy each day.

I remember times where I had no money. I was 23 years old and starving. I had to look through my sofa to find quarters and dimes. I had enough money to go down to the grocery store, the little bodega on the corner of 80th and Amsterdam in New York City. I had just enough money to get a box of pasta and a stick of butter and that was dinner for the next two nights. And I remember thinking to myself, “I can’t wait to have money so I can eat better.”

But in reality, it was the beauty of that moment that I should’ve been appreciating. Nothing lasts forever. Every moment you have is just a fleeting moment, because whether or not you can embrace the lesson that life gives you right then and there, you’ve outgrown that moment. And when you outgrow that moment, what happens? You never get that moment back.

I look back on those days in my 20s and I could easily write 100 blogs about all the things that I went through emotionally. But the real message here and the bottom line is that you’ll never get those moments back. Enjoy wherever you’re at, because that’s exactly where you’re supposed to be right now.
Don’t obsess about what you need in the future, don’t think about how your life is going to be better when you have something else or when you are someplace else. Just enjoy the beauty of where you are right now in your life. Embrace it, enjoy it, and honor it.

Because one day you’re going to be like me and you’re just going to look back and wonder why you didn’t fully enjoy it all the way.

Alright, I’m guessing most of you are saying no.

But really, what if Santa Claus was real? I mean, what if Santa Claus was actually real?

What if you could go to the mall, sit on Santa’s lap — I’m sure there are some dirty old man Santas whose lap you would not want to sit on—but what if you could sit on Santa’s lap and actually ask for something to be delivered under your tree come Christmas?

Think about that for a minute. What would you ask for if you could get one amazing gift this Christmas? Would you ask for a better job? Would you ask for the world economy to be rescued? Would you ask for world peace, to end hunger and starvation in the world?

Are you a person who really wants to save the world or do you really just want to save yourself? Be honest.

Would you ask Santa for a hot girlfriend or a boyfriend? “Hey Santa, can you deliver something special under my tree? Somebody hot, somebody sexy, somebody who desires me and wants to hang with me every day?”

What would you ask for if Santa Claus was real, if you can actually go to the mall and actually wish for something on Santa’s lap?

So today let’s get into the Christmas spirit a little bit and let’s make out our Christmas wish list. I don’t care if you’ve been naughty or nice. It’s not really a big deal since it’s just pretend anyway, and it’s fun to have a little conversation in a way that gets us all back to being six years old again and getting excited about what’s going to be waiting for us under the tree at Christmas time.

So what would be under your tree this year? And go ahead, be comprehensive in your lists. Make a list that’s 10 wishes long if you want. I’m looking forward to reading about all your wishes! Who knows, maybe Santa is real and maybe some of it might come true this holiday season ☺

I am getting really tired of all the negative thinking and venting that is going on here.

You think you have it rough?

Do you really think your that un-dateable and ugly?

Do you think your life is so hard that no one will love you or want to be with you?

Do you really think that nothing is ever going to change?

Well here is a reality check.

Watch this video and let me know how you feel now.

Its time the pity party comes to an end.

I’m loving these quotes that are coming out from Steve Jobs….. Gotta love the mindset of successful people….

How Steve Jobs Changed Dating

“When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”

So if today was your last day what would you do different?

Would you still go out tonight and hit the bars?

What would you do instead and how would you push yourself out of your comfort zone on your last day?

Today, I take a trip down memory lane for you guys and tell you exactly how I lost my virginity.

 ”Nervous” is not a strong enough word for the feelings I had swirling around inside of me over that brief (but seemingly very long) two-day period in my life.

How David Wygant Virginty

What? you may be asking.  How does it take someone two days to lose their virginity?  Did it take me 2 days of begging, pleading, and convincing some poor teenage girl to give in to me?  Or was it due to my complete lack of sexual skill at the time that made the whole ordeal last 2 days?

Listen to todays podcast, and you will realize that stressing out so much about sex is completely not worth it.

If you want to gain the knowledge from my 30+ years of sexual experiences to make sure you aren’t making the same mistakes all guys make in bed and ensure you aren’t nicknamed “the 1 pump chump”, click here…

There are a lot of men out there who have a little bit of money to throw around.

What a lot of guys will tend to do is take that money and spend lavishly to try and attract women.  They get a fancy sports car.  They buy a great house with all the bells and whistles.  They throw parties at their house, big parties with music, booze, food, where everybody can look at them and they can be the center of attention at their own party.

I call these guys the look-at-me’s: Look at me… Look at me… Look at all the things that I have! Look at all the great things that I do, look at my job, look at my great car, look at me!

And they like to throw it around. And a lot of women will go and date these guys, because women buy into it too.  Women will believe that this guy is a rich, strong, powerful, sexy James Bond-type guy.

Are You A Wannabe James Bond?

So they go out on a date, maybe they have a fling and sleep together.  Then they realize that this guy really isn’t James Bond at all.  He’s like some mutant threeway love-child between Wayne’s World, Beavis and Butthead, and Homer Simpson.

The guy may be good-looking, he may not be good-looking.  But the bottom line is that a lot of women buy into this fantasy of who he is pretending to be, and they don’t even pay attention to who he actually is. They don’t realize until further down the road that he’s just Garth from Wayne’s World with a bunch of cool toys.

Money may buy you fame, but money doesn’t buy you game.  Money doesn’t buy you becoming cool.  All money does is give you more freedom to do the things that you want to do.  If you’re going to use your dollar bills as your number one attraction weapon, and if you’re going to use it to bring in the women you desire, you’d better get ready to be exposed right away.

That woman will either: (a) look at you and expect you to be as debonair as James Bond, only to roll her eyes and be disappointed when she realizes that you’re actually an annoying Beavis-type; OR (b) she’s going to manipulate you, dig deep into your pocket, and make sure that every dime you spend together is on her.

Be careful when you go out and advertise yourself as somebody who you are not.

In dating, you need to be who you are. You need to advertise yourself exactly the way you are from the inside out, because you WILL be exposed.  There are a lot of players out there, there are a lot men and women who can play the game much better than you, and they will take advantage of it every step of the way.