The Courtesy Call By A Sexy Intuitive Woman

I’m a woman in my early 30s and an active dater. I
see a lot of time and attention devoted to how men can
meet women, but see zero advice given about how to end
an encounter with a woman. (Adam Sandler once said
that he enjoyed crafting “break up” lines more than
pick up lines: “It’s not you, it’s me… I can’t stand
you…” But seriously…)

While I’d say that no woman expects a full-blown
“break up” conversation after 3-6 dates, and we can
all understand that sometimes things fizzle or
incompatibility surfaces, I’m pretty sure that most (if
not all) women might appreciate a courtesy phone call
(or even an email, in some cases) letting her know
that he’s just not that into her to continue. No need
for the “let’s just be friends” quip – just be real
about your lack of interest.

I’ll share an example: once, I met a man at a party,
he asked me out and we went out three times. He was
terrific, but I realized I wasn’t feeling the
chemistry.

So, I met him for coffee, looked him in
the eye, and sincerely assured him that he was a
fantastic person but I just didn’t feel the magic. He
was impressed that I would take the time to have an
in-person talk and that I would be so sincere. That
was about 4 years ago; he’s since gotten married, and
we’re still great friends.

My point: if more of us
would treat each other with courtesy, even at “The
End,” dating would be a lot more pleasurable for
everyone. No loose ends, everyone walks away feeling
good about what transpired.

I read your recent blog about why a woman would look
at the horizon instead of a man who’s 5 feet away from
her… I could be “projecting…” But maybe the
unfortunate answer is that the guy she’s been seeing
for a few weeks is on her mind because he stopped
calling without explanation… Or maybe she’s
wondering why it’s been 10 days
after their fifth great date and he never called…

Another way to think about it: Isn’t it better to
leave (or be left) with a lasting impression that you
were a gentleman? Wouldn’t a woman be more inclined
to view the next man she meets with optimism if the
last man she dated left her with a good impression?

I think your readers – male and female – would benefit
from the “good karma” that could ripple in the dating
pool if more men (and women) would show each other
some courtesy and honest communication. Then, maybe
next time, a woman won’t be as gun-shy about looking a
man in the eye because she’ll be more open to the
experience…

Maybe this is a topic to open up for your audience to
discuss… It’d be interesting to hear why men don’t
call (other than not avoiding the delivery of “bad
news,” of course…) And I’m guessing men have their
own preference about how to be treated with
courtesy… Let the karma lessons begin!