Comments on: Be Patient http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/ Sex. Relationships. Dating. That's what I'm talkin' 'bout. Fri, 10 Feb 2012 02:15:04 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v= By: Jaime http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17158 Jaime Wed, 13 Aug 2008 01:22:13 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17158 Thanks for the input David, et al. A quick bit of background on me so you'll understand where I was coming from. I tend to always get what I want, when I want it. But in dating? This attitude isn't always such a good thing. I'd meet a guy I'd like and then rush into it head first. Every time, I'd be in a relationship with someone I either had amazing physical chemistry with, but didn't like as a friend OR vice versa. This of course, meant a quick break up to match the quick start up. Not so good. There's a quote somewhere that says insanity is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting a different result. So this time, I slowed down to see how I feel about him as a person. As for the flirting, I think I've been on the ball. I'm already a big-time smiler, I touch him to emphasize points and the level of teasing (but appropriate) sexual banter has increased from zero to some. *lol* I will admit that I'd been holding off a bit, because the idea of rejection does tend to scare me. But I've come to realize that rejection isn't my "fault" or something I can control. He either likes me or he doesn't, the important thing is that I like me and keep working to improve myself as a person every day. Beyond that, my gut tells me that there's a mutual attraction between us. Enough rambling... I love that people read other's posts and give heartfelt replies and I thank you all for that. This blog rules! Thanks for the input David, et al. A quick bit of background on me so you’ll understand where I was coming from. I tend to always get what I want, when I want it. But in dating? This attitude isn’t always such a good thing. I’d meet a guy I’d like and then rush into it head first. Every time, I’d be in a relationship with someone I either had amazing physical chemistry with, but didn’t like as a friend OR vice versa. This of course, meant a quick break up to match the quick start up. Not so good. There’s a quote somewhere that says insanity is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting a different result. So this time, I slowed down to see how I feel about him as a person.

As for the flirting, I think I’ve been on the ball. I’m already a big-time smiler, I touch him to emphasize points and the level of teasing (but appropriate) sexual banter has increased from zero to some. *lol* I will admit that I’d been holding off a bit, because the idea of rejection does tend to scare me. But I’ve come to realize that rejection isn’t my “fault” or something I can control. He either likes me or he doesn’t, the important thing is that I like me and keep working to improve myself as a person every day. Beyond that, my gut tells me that there’s a mutual attraction between us. Enough rambling…

I love that people read other’s posts and give heartfelt replies and I thank you all for that. This blog rules!

]]> By: Bertie http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17118 Bertie Mon, 11 Aug 2008 04:05:25 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17118 Connie, she needs a speech class. I've always been a little disheartened by the fact that our state no longer makes it a requirement in order to pass high school. Its one of the best things that I ever did. I'm still rather quiet til I get to know someone, but I wouldn't be in my profession or teaching others to do what I do if I hadn't taken that class. Other than that I'd say she needs more extracurricular activities that put her in a "safe" setting where she gets to know others, and others get to know her. Connie, she needs a speech class. I’ve always been a little disheartened by the fact that our state no longer makes it a requirement in order to pass high school. Its one of the best things that I ever did. I’m still rather quiet til I get to know someone, but I wouldn’t be in my profession or teaching others to do what I do if I hadn’t taken that class. Other than that I’d say she needs more extracurricular activities that put her in a “safe” setting where she gets to know others, and others get to know her.

]]> By: connie http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17106 connie Sun, 10 Aug 2008 07:31:41 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17106 Hi David (and all) this is my second visit. Yep it gets addictive. I have a special question for you, and it falls somewhere in the patience/shy/waiting catagory. My grandaughter is 16 and way too shy. She is missing tons of stuff because she won't 'visit' with many people. Let's just say she is not outgoing in the least. Yet, she is cute, funny, lovable in her safe home enviorment. I have tried to suggest ways she can nicely flirt with boys at school, or some type of comment she can say (she answers questions-thats it-no further comments). Now the question: Do you think someone will ever be patient enough with her to wait her out as she gets to know a boy?? It will take way more than the second or third date or call that you men talk about. I fear she will miss out on a lot of fun if she can't over come this. Thanks. Hi David (and all) this is my second visit. Yep it gets addictive.
I have a special question for you, and it falls somewhere in the patience/shy/waiting catagory.
My grandaughter is 16 and way too shy. She is missing tons of stuff because she won’t ‘visit’ with many people. Let’s just say she is not outgoing in the least. Yet, she is cute, funny, lovable in her safe home enviorment. I have tried to suggest ways she can nicely flirt with boys at school, or some type of comment she can say (she answers questions-thats it-no further comments). Now the question:
Do you think someone will ever be patient enough with her to wait her out as she gets to know a boy?? It will take way more than the second or third date or call that you men talk about.
I fear she will miss out on a lot of fun if she can’t over come this.
Thanks.

]]> By: Bertie http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17103 Bertie Sun, 10 Aug 2008 02:40:09 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17103 Lou! Hugs! I'm quite fine as a matter of fact Been searching around for my happy place in my soul lately, and I'm just in a nice spot right now...You know like the sweet spot on your tennis racket where you can return the impossible volley... Lou! Hugs!
I’m quite fine as a matter of fact Been searching around for my happy place in my soul lately, and I’m just in a nice spot right now…You know like the sweet spot on your tennis racket where you can return the impossible volley…

]]> By: Loubega http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17102 Loubega Sun, 10 Aug 2008 01:47:35 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17102 Wonderful website setting and highly user-friendly. Patience is a virtual nowdays. I have always lived in the fast lane, setting goals and impatiently struggling to fulfil them. DW, u rock... Bertie (RN), how r u doing today? Wonderful website setting and highly user-friendly. Patience is a virtual nowdays. I have always lived in the fast lane, setting goals and impatiently struggling to fulfil them.

DW, u rock… Bertie (RN), how r u doing today?

]]> By: Kristen http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17097 Kristen Sat, 09 Aug 2008 22:08:40 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17097 I don't think that David is proposing that patience in the context of "good things come to those who wait." I think the last thing David would tell anyone he coaches is to wait for people you want to meet to come to you. I think he's proposing that we need to continue to take action and work hard on developing the skills we want EVEN IF we don't instantly get the results we want. So if we are learning to inititate conversation, we shouldn't give up if the very first (or the first several) people don't respond exactly as we would hope they would. We need to be patient enough to know that if we're doing the right things, they WILL work if we do them consistently. Way too many people are used to wanting (and getting) everything they want RIGHT NOW without having to work for it or to suffer any disappointment to get it along the way. Learning to be good with the opposite sex follows this same rule. We need to be patient ... do what David is teaching us, and the great results WILL happen. I don’t think that David is proposing that patience in the context of “good things come to those who wait.” I think the last thing David would tell anyone he coaches is to wait for people you want to meet to come to you.

I think he’s proposing that we need to continue to take action and work hard on developing the skills we want EVEN IF we don’t instantly get the results we want. So if we are learning to inititate conversation, we shouldn’t give up if the very first (or the first several) people don’t respond exactly as we would hope they would. We need to be patient enough to know that if we’re doing the right things, they WILL work if we do them consistently.

Way too many people are used to wanting (and getting) everything they want RIGHT NOW without having to work for it or to suffer any disappointment to get it along the way. Learning to be good with the opposite sex follows this same rule. We need to be patient … do what David is teaching us, and the great results WILL happen.

]]> By: JustMe http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17094 JustMe Sat, 09 Aug 2008 20:42:44 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17094 and jamie.. you def need to flirt!! david's right! ;) and jamie.. you def need to flirt!!

david’s right! ;)

]]> By: JustMe http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17093 JustMe Sat, 09 Aug 2008 20:40:30 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17093 haha, i feel like writing a colossal post yet again! just to try your patience .. :P in short: i have learned a LOT about myself lately.. and i feel like i'm not quite there YET.. but i'm definitely getting here... i'm only 20 :P (i still think it's weird and funny that i am here in norway and you guys know each other.. (atleast you live in the same country) and i keep on commenting here.. :P i just really like this blog!) at work today i felt REALLY exhausted, i felt like smashing something.. it wasn't all about being tired after a long day's work.. i was feeling/still feel a little frustration. reason: i think too much! i think about too much too often.. my head hurts! lol.. i've NEVER had headaches before.. not good >.< i'm not being patient with myself sometimes.. it exhausts you! but about being patient. here's another story: i had the hugest crush (when i have a crush on a guy i act all clumsy.. as in fergie's "clumsy" vid) on this guy in high school.. i was in my first year and he was a year older than me..second year. we got to know each other through this charity project at school (i did a lot of charity work in high school) and i fell for his kindness and shyness :) he was really sweet.. and damn, so careful! he was never down right about anything.. his feelings for me, how he liked me and wanted my number etc.. i did a little chasing back and forth, but i held back sometimes so not to scare him.. because he was so shy i never knew if he really liked me (until we actually got together) guess what: i waited a little over a year for him.. just to know how he feels about me! i know, it's probably not the kind of patience you're talking about in your blog, david.. hmm, maybe it is. because i never pushed him to come clean.. he did so when he felt he was ready himself. i gave him signs all the time :P poor guy, i was his first crush ever! khiem - i really got what you said in your comment, about becoming the source of pleasure .. (sorry, it sounds a bit dirty to me right now.. i'm laughing) powerful words! i have a question though; "let your "ego" go and start making decisions that ultimately are "you".. " just out of pure interest! how do you guys define ego then? cause i've had SO many discussions on this.. you know, putting yourself first in a relationship.. loving yourself etc.. SOUNDS as if it's selfish.. and at the same time you have to let your "ego" go ?! it sure sounds contradictory.. i know it isn't, but i would really love to hear your explanation on that! :) have a nice evening! haha, i feel like writing a colossal post yet again! just to try your patience .. :P

in short: i have learned a LOT about myself lately.. and i feel like i’m not quite there YET.. but i’m definitely getting here… i’m only 20 :P

(i still think it’s weird and funny that i am here in norway and you guys know each other.. (atleast you live in the same country) and i keep on commenting here.. :P i just really like this blog!)

at work today i felt REALLY exhausted, i felt like smashing something.. it wasn’t all about being tired after a long day’s work.. i was feeling/still feel a little frustration. reason: i think too much! i think about too much too often.. my head hurts! lol.. i’ve NEVER had headaches before.. not good >.<
i’m not being patient with myself sometimes.. it exhausts you!

but about being patient. here’s another story:
i had the hugest crush (when i have a crush on a guy i act all clumsy.. as in fergie’s “clumsy” vid) on this guy in high school.. i was in my first year and he was a year older than me..second year. we got to know each other through this charity project at school (i did a lot of charity work in high school) and i fell for his kindness and shyness :) he was really sweet.. and damn, so careful! he was never down right about anything.. his feelings for me, how he liked me and wanted my number etc..

i did a little chasing back and forth, but i held back sometimes so not to scare him.. because he was so shy i never knew if he really liked me (until we actually got together)

guess what: i waited a little over a year for him.. just to know how he feels about me! i know, it’s probably not the kind of patience you’re talking about in your blog, david.. hmm, maybe it is. because i never pushed him to come clean.. he did so when he felt he was ready himself. i gave him signs all the time :P
poor guy, i was his first crush ever!

khiem – i really got what you said in your comment, about becoming the source of pleasure ..
(sorry, it sounds a bit dirty to me right now.. i’m laughing)
powerful words! i have a question though; “let your “ego” go and start making decisions that ultimately are “you”.. ”
just out of pure interest! how do you guys define ego then?
cause i’ve had SO many discussions on this.. you know, putting yourself first in a relationship.. loving yourself etc.. SOUNDS as if it’s selfish.. and at the same time you have to let your “ego” go ?!
it sure sounds contradictory.. i know it isn’t, but i would really love to hear your explanation on that!

:) have a nice evening!

]]> By: David Wygant http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17090 David Wygant Sat, 09 Aug 2008 17:31:19 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17090 Jamie The more i read your post the more i think he thinks you are friends. So he is waiting and hoping that you are going to give him a go sign In my womens products i talk all about buying signals. Signals that tell a man that you are interested. You are not flirting and acting like a buddy so he is not going to make a move. A lot of men will play it safe and a lot of women will as well. Flirt!!! Jamie

The more i read your post the more i think he thinks you are friends.

So he is waiting and hoping that you are going to give him a go sign

In my womens products i talk all about buying signals.

Signals that tell a man that you are interested.

You are not flirting and acting like a buddy so he is not going to make a move.

A lot of men will play it safe and a lot of women will as well.

Flirt!!!

]]> By: David Wygant http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/be-patient/604/#comment-17089 David Wygant Sat, 09 Aug 2008 17:29:22 +0000 http://www.davidwygant.com/blog/?p=604#comment-17089 Jamie Do you think this guy knows you like him? Or are you playing it safe and not flirting enough with him so he knows you are interested? Think about this Jamie

Do you think this guy knows you like him?

Or are you playing it safe and not flirting enough with him so he knows you are interested?

Think about this

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