Change Your Dating Life By Taking Attraction Action
By David Wygant
So there you are, you’re out and about walking around during a typical day. You walk into your favorite grocery store and at the other end of the produce section you spot someone to whom you are really attracted.
They looked at you. You looked at them. There is that momentary glance that passes between you.
The question is: what are you going to do about that? Most of us don’t do anything about it.
Why do so many of us hesitate to take action in this situation? We tend to think too much about what we need to say, or how to be perfect, or what the exact right approach should be.
We tend to worry too much about how that other person will perceive us, wondering whether that person will be impressed by us. The fact of the matter is that they already are. They’ve looked at you. You’ve already exchanged that momentary glance.
We are all familiar with that momentary glance. We’ve all experienced it. It is what you do with that momentary glance, though, that shapes and creates your life.
Most of us will do nothing. We’ll just dismiss it. We’ll just walk away saying to ourselves “Well, I don’t know the right thing to say.” We’ll think that person was looking at someone else.
They were looking at you! All you need to do is acknowledge it with a simple “hello,” “how’s your day going?” or something else simple like that. Just say something – say anything! It doesn’t really matter what you say so long as you put yourself out there. They’ve already put themselves out there by looking at you, and you’ve put yourself out there already by looking at them.
So why not take that one small extra step and do something about that attraction. Take attraction action . . . you never know where that next simple “hello” may lead.
Todays podcast is all about the incredible beauty of women.
Listen in as I describe what really turns me on about women and what I look for.
Ohh, you just touched on a good point in your podcast…religious sex guilt…I think you need to do a blog or something on how to deal with that, because I have no idea how to deal with it.
I could have definitely used that advice today. How do you break the awkwardness and rushed atmosphere of the everyday? It seems like for me all the political-correctness of our current society has made me more aware of sexism and racism, but more inclined to not speak my own mind because of the risk of being perceived offensive. A great example was from this past Christmas shopping season, when my brother and I noticed how frigidly nice people were being to each other in line with one- or two-liners if something bad could have happened. No one wanted to be the guy who had an outburst in the waiting line, but any sort of exchanges were just a burst of apologies for even the most minute inconveniences.
So anyway, I was in line at a snack shop by a pool, and there was a very attractive attendant, but another girl received my order. I just smiled, put in my order, didn’t ask the opinionated question I had about what’s the best thing to eat here for a first-timer, and my attendant quickly asked the next person in line for his order. I spent a relaxed afternoon sunbathing, but I seemed to be chasing opportunities to make conversation openers based on observations. Ay.
I think at the end of the day, it comes down to 3 letters… OYM – Open Your Mouth…
Damn, I really hate to admit this, but I’ve often been one of the guys who doesn’t take action way too many times… I think I’m just still somewhat of a perfectionist at heart… a little too much so… I think it’s time to change that.
The problem that I face alot of times is when I see an attractive women in a train everyday, I just don’t know what to say. Last friday morning, I was on a train and this girl was reading a book. When I read couple of paragrahs, I felt like I should ask her the author’s name and a little detail about it. For example, I could’ve asked: Hey this book is very interesting. I just read couple of paragraphs and I kinda like this book. Who is the author of this book. Secondly, what kinds of books do you like to read. Obviously I could’ve asked as many questions as I could.
The problem that I face is when is the right time to say it. I always stayed quiet since I was a child. I used to afraid to ask questions in the class. I used to think that if I ask a question, other people will look at me. Sometimes I wanted to ask questions but then I thought no way, people make fun of me. I Still face the same difficulty. Same thing happend to me on a train. I wanted to ask this girl questions about the book but then I was afraid that people would look at me like I am idiot or I am hitting on her or she will think the same way. I was thinking, hey Tariq just remember what David says. GO AND TALK. ASK A QUESTION IDIOT. JUST GO. ASK IT YOU DUM ASS. GO MAN GO. But on the other side I was afraid. She looked at me couple of times but I didn’t do anything. Because technically, expecially in the morning no body talks on a train. Everyone is trying to get to work or school.
What is your opinion about this David.
Seconly, would you recommend me talking Improv classes and what type. How the program works?
David,
Since it is going to be really hard for me to sit in the class on tuesday and thursday because Melissa, is going to be there. I will be thinking about her until this summer. What would you recommend me? The only reason I am asking you because she insulted me in front of 7-8 people. On tuesday when I go to class, she is going to be there and couple of my friends might ask questions from me because I left the class when she insulted me. Secondly, everybody will be looking at me like a jerk. What is your recommendation. I am not fully confident.
Sometimes I think, why she came in to my life.
Tariq,
for crying out loud, forget about Melissa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And if your friends ask why you left the class when she insulted me, just tell them you had your period and laugh about it.
So … who should speak first? Man or woman?
Haha, the one feeling the most attracted should speak!!
no, seriously.. but a good blog this one
Hey Tariq, you made an interesting point about the difficulty of asking questions. I read a really good book recently called “the war against boys”. Its basically about misguided feminism and the sad state it has left our generation of men. Basically one part in the book the author (which is a woman) says that school teachers have been taught to call on girls more than boys when hands are raised in class. This was done because it was believed girls were being held back and boys were given too much help in school. So years later studies have found that after about 4th grade the boys stop raising hands and asking or answering questions because of the rejection of the teacher. Now we live in a world where girls lead in almost every aspect of school except for sports (and the feminists are working diligently on fixing that). The worst part is nobody notices or really cares cause its not politically correct to say boys need help.
Doug! How funny… I read in the newspaper today on the “debating” pages, a small contribution on equality in the area of “family politics” in our society (Norway) in which a guy wrote about how women tend to generalize too much on the parenting skills of men in our society and thus work the family politics to their advantage..
for instance, the author mentioned a book written by a Norwegian woman, where she stated that women are natural “parents” and are better fit to raise a child after its parents break up… questions as to where the child/children should live, in whose custody etc, should be in favor of women.. child support and all that is thereby decided by that (among a few other) statement..
I’ve studied feminism, and am taking a course called Women Writing as of Aug 08..
Feminism to me is very intersting, and i agree with you (partly) that is has become politically incorrect to favor boys/men based on other things than their gender! because of the gender issue..
I myself am FOR equality, but it doesn’t have to be at the EXPENSE of men…I think this one point is a major issue when it comes to why feminism is such a “negative” word seen from men’s point of view..
See I’m not against feminisim either. Im all for equality. See the key word I used here was “misguided” feminism. As is mentioned in this book, it is small extremists groups of feminists that want to push down males instead of having equallity. Kind of like a payback because women were mistreated in the past. It is these small organizations that our schools and government listen too.
In that article you mentioned I do believe Women are naturaly better at nurturing a child just by there nature. I mean even in the animal world its the male that will try and eat the babies soon as they are born and the mother must protect and raise them. But men are great at providing for the family and leading by example. Thats why the family institution is so important. But when a divorce happens sometimes it can be caused by one of the parents failing to provide or nurture. So in that case maybe no priority should be given to the father or mother because someone could be failing at certain responsabilities.
Yea, i know you said misguided feminism
that’s where i totally agree with you. you just explained what i feel like equality/feminism should be: NOT at the expense of the other sex..
) and he felt like good male parents should have the same advantage as good female parents when it comes to parenting after a break up…he felt there was too much generalization..
but about the contributional piece i was talking about, the male author claimed to have been put in the same category as the “bad male parents” that mistreated their wives, beat their children and “saw the world through the bottom of a beer bottle” (or something like that
i think we agree though
(i don’t support those extremist feminists either..)