Fighting CougarsFriday night Brett and I went out. You’ve seen some of Brett’s writing on here before. Anyway, we went out for dinner, and weirdly ended up running into a real estate agent that showed me some property a while back.

She looked over at me and said, “Where do I know you from? Oh yeah, I showed you some properties. Your name’s Jeff isn’t it?

Right away I thought, “Now there’s someone I’d love to give a nice hefty commission to when I buy some real estate. A woman who can’t even remember my name. I mean I’m not great at remembering names either, but I’ll just say hey, and pretend I remember the name instead of guessing it wrong. It makes you sound stupid, especially if you’ve talked business with them.

Not only did she forget my name, she also committed another major cardinal sin. She didn’t introduce us to the friend she was sitting with. For all she knew I could have been in the market for some real estate. I could have been worth a big commission to her, yet she was getting everything socially all wrong. Life is all about networking, and this woman didn’t know how to do it. Anyway, this has nothing to do with the battling cougars. This was just the start of an extremely entertaining night.

The cougar battle came later on at a place called “Casa Del Mar.”

It’s a little bar/hangout type of place. It’s very chilled and very mellow. There were a couple of girls having a birthday party there, and me and Brett sat down to talk to them. All of a sudden there was this one woman who appeared. Must have been about 50 years old, bleached blonde hair, wearing a skirt way to tight, and underwear showing!

So this woman starts talking to a guy, and then comes over to sit with her friend. The next thing you know the two women are texting each other and shooting nasty looks across the table. What are they fighting about?

They were arguing about the guy the bleach blonde had been chatting to. The friend had been watching and had apparently already got the guy’s number. “That’s good for you,” said the bleach blonde. “I’m not interested in him. You can have him.” She continued.

But they yelled and they screamed at each other. They battled and argued for about 10 minutes going back and forth. All the while this guy is sitting at the bar knowing he’s getting lucky because these women were obviously fighting for his attention. So I said to the bleached blonde, “Your friend is starving for attention.”

The blonde replied, “It’s not that. She just always blames me for losing guys and says I try to steal them from her.”

The whole situation made me realize something on a much deeper level. Women are starving for attention, and men are too afraid to give it to them. That’s the reason cougars will battle on a Friday night for the attention of a guy they’ll probably never see again. I don’t know which of them, if either, ended up with the guy because we left the place before them.

But guys, it’s time to man up. Grab your balls once and for all and talk to these attention starved women. Too many guys sit there not doing a thing. So when women finally find a guy to talk to they fight over him like mad.

Why are women starving for attention if the stats say there are more of us than them? It’s because they want attention from men, but most guys are waiting for a sign to go and speak to them. Does she tweak her hair in one direction or another? Is her knee slightly bent? Is she ambidextrous? You look for all these signs because you’re looking for an excuse NOT to walk over.

Now I know there are some of you out there who do, so I’m not pointing the finger at all of you, but 90% of you aren’t. I can say that confidently because whenever I go out 90% of the men I see are just staring at women, and doing nothing about it.

This is your first Monday rant of the New Year, and this is a post I want you to start reading over and over again. I want you to think of these two women and think to yourself, it could have been you they were fighting over. Women are desperate for attention and crazy that more men don’t approach. Be the man who does approach. Be the man that walks over and talks. Be the man who takes control and starts a conversation.

Don’t worry about the outcome, and stop looking for validation from them. It doesn’t matter what you say. Just say something and then listen. You’ll soon know whether the interaction is going anywhere. Stop looking for signs. Think about it. Think about last year. Did you have a great year with women?

This is the time to be radically authentic. It’s time to be real, raw, and open. I want to see approaches this year. I want to hear what happened and what she said. I want to know about your successes and challenges. I don’t want excuses. It’s time to change your mindset and your attitude.

For the more advanced guys, tell me your stories. I want to hear what flaws you still have, and I want to know how you’re going to get through them. That’s what we’re going to do every day of 2014.