Patrick gave you great advice there.

The way you approach her is very simple.

Get personal with her. Get to know her for who she is. Get deeper with her emotions so you can form some form of connection. However, as you get deeper in conversation, don’t neglect the idea of being fun.

Actually, you can just start with being fun. You can tease, flirt, be playful with her as you work on projects together. You want to be fun but not so fun that you’d be too distracting from getting your project done.

As she feels excited and good hanging out with you for school/work purposes, you can lead her to 1-on-1 interactions. Ask to hang out with her outside of the group setting. That’s when you get even more personal, that’s when you do more sexual flirting, that’s when you make your move.

If you keep that process pressure-less and casual, she’ll enjoy your company tremendously b/c you’re letting her see more of you little by little. As David says it: make them want more out of you.

Since she’s in your group or in your class, you don’t have to rush the process at all. Take your time. Enjoy her company, get to know her and keep it fun.

Now… getting back on the blog topic… I think I might need to find a light to burn all that wood that I found myself with while reading the blog.

I’m sure David will respond to this eventually too, but here’s my 2 cents.

You have to make your connection with her about more than work and school. While you’re working, there’s always a lull or a break in the action. Ask her a personal question or two. Break through the proffesional distance.

The important thing here is to avoid coming off too intense and interested at first. I find when I have a crush on someone, it’s easy to be too invest too much energy right off the bat. It’s unintentional, but it’s a turn off. Your interest must feel justified by something she did.

So be off-hand instead. Find out a few things about her you can like and appreciate. What makes her unique?

Group projects are great because there’s always memorable moments and things that happen. You can call back to those later in text messages or conversation and it makes for a stronger bond.

Try to create the feeling that you and her are teaming up against a common obstacle. My friend Khiem calls this “complicity”: the feeling that you and her are accomplices, working together on something. The more secret and personal this feeling is, the better.

The group project is a reason to keep seeing each other over and over, so don’t push too hard. You’ll have other chances. Make your connection a little at a time. Once your interest feels justified, suggest getting together sometime to hang out. Again, make it casual.

Once you’re out together, don’t talk about school. Relate on other things, and build the personal connection. Now you can tease and flirt with her too. She’ll feel safer doing this away from the rest of the group where she won’t be judged.

I hope that helps. Let us know if you’ve got more questions. Good luck,

– Patrick

I wanna know how can you attract women in your group. For example,
there is a girl who is in my class and my group as well right now. We are working on a group project. She is very attractive and intelligent and I really like this girl and wanna go out with her. How do I approach her?

You can also write something in your blog because I think alot of people are facing with this issue.

Thanks.

Tariq