Are You Just Wasting Time?
May 6, 2009 
71 Comments
This morning when I woke up, I realized today is the day “Mommy Bootcamp” officially starts. Yes, my girlfriend’s mom arrives tonight and I’ve got to pick her up at the airport.
It’s going to be an interesting two weeks to say the least. I have never had a house guest longer than three days. Actually, that’s not true. My mom came for seven days one time, so I’ve never had a house guest for two weeks before now.
I am very open to new things, though, and I think this two weeks will be very interesting. I will get to learn so much more about the woman I love. I will get to learn so much more about how she was as a kid.
I will get to learn how she interacts with her mom. I will get to learn how she interacts under “mommy stress.” Yes, that is an official new term – “mommy stress.”
What inevitably happens when you’re under “mommy stress” for a period of two weeks is that there’s bound to be at least one kick-ass drag-down brawl. There has to be, after all those years and all the things that have happened between the two of you. Basically, I am going to be acting as the referee.
What I really want to talk about today, though, is not “mommy stress” but rather something that really kicked my ass the other day . . . and really made me think. As some of you know from reading my blog the last couple days, I learned recently that an old friend of mine died quite suddenly at the age of 45.
What this made me think about was how much time we waste on so many ridiculous things. How many of you are wasting time?
How much time do you waste in petty arguments? How much time do you waste wondering if you should talk to some girl (or some guy if you’re a woman), and then how much MORE time do you waste contemplating how to walk over to that someone?
How many of you waste tons of time thinking about vacations you never take, or worse planning vacations to Europe you’ll take twenty years from now when you retire? Who says you’re still going to be around at the age you now intend to retire?
You know, I did a blog a long time ago called “The Bucket List,” in which I said that I really believe we all should make our own personal bucket list (since you never know when you are going to ‘kick the bucket’). So in today’s podcast, I talk about how to stop wasting time, seizing the moment, and really stop with all the petty things we do. This podcast will show you how to start taking action so you can create an amazing life!
How many of your are feuding with your parents or with a friend, and you just continue to let it sit unresolved? You refuse to pick up the phone. You refuse to let any of it go.
You know, when my dad passed away, I had been in touch with him the final three months of his life after feuding on and off with him for seven years. For the first time in my life, I actually accepted him for who he was and not what I needed or wanted.
My brother never had that opportunity, nor did my sister. Although my brother has come to terms with that, I know he would love to have had the chance to have that final conversation with our dad.
So today’s podcast is all about kicking yourself in the ass. It’s all about deciding to stop waiting and wasting time. We waste so much time standing on principle, and these principles on which we stand so firmly never get us further in life.
What is your your biggest fear or the one thing you need to do that you’ve been putting off? Is it a vacation? Is it a phone call with an old friend? Is it apologizing to somebody?
No matter what “it” is — whether it’s booking a trip, speaking to a member of the opposite sex, buying yourself a new whatever or resolving an old feud — go out NOW and do it. Stop waiting and start doing!
Click Here to Listen To Today’s Podcast:
This is not only one podcast you cannot afford to miss, but I will also make you one guarantee if you do. If you miss this podcast, I guarantee you will never meet the person for whom you’re looking! So tune in now!
Also, if you want to learn how to breakthrough ANY fear or excuse that is holding you back from having the amazing life you most desire, then you need to check out my Men’s “What’s Your Excuse?” and my Women’s “No Excuses” programs. They will show you how to stop being a waiter in life TODAY, and how to start building the kind of incredible “no regrets” life you deserve!
LOVE this podcast … and what you’re saying here reminds me of that saying about how the brave man dies only once, but the coward dies a thousand deaths…
Thanks David
So what am I reading this for
could be tickling my kids…
Now, David watch out getting too caught up in being a mommy stress referee…remember be very non partisan moms and daughtes can have their disagreements, but we will make up faster than you can imagine. Have fun with the girls together. How was the Mom’s reaction on the food yesterday.
I have this great quote. Yakub I know you will love this one.
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” — Mahatma Gandhi
Kate
Anytime and I am really glad that you enjoyed this.
Marina great quote and the mom arrives at 6pm.
I am all ready for this I think:)
This is a classic man versus mother in law video.
Or this classic clip. you have to love sit coms and the way they show how much fun family can be:)
Funny Flintstones Video David …. the Marie Barone of the stone age
Funny videos,
Could not find the video on youtube, but you will be fine as long as Mom does does not treat you like Ethel treats Earl in Henson’s Dinosaurs. Maybe one of the funniest shows shows ever, such a classic. Especially in the episode The Last Temptation of Ethel the interactions between the two were hilarious.
We know she loves you.
…you are good to her baby girl and makes her happy, that’s all a mom can wish for.
Hey David-
If you were married, you could play THIS special tune for your girlfriend’s mother upon her arrival:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TxwNLxy5_8A&feature=PlayList&p=27BE62B93E1A62AE&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=62
David, Just hope you never have to be privy to this particular discussion while your girlfriend’s mother is visiting!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPeMxXV5xwQ
Hey there,
can anyone tell me how to download the podcast from the website?
Thanks a lot
David,
Excellent blogcast man! We should all make the most of life cause most of us don’t know long we have here. And none of us know exactly how long. Seize the day folks. Don’t live or simply exist in such a way that in your late years, you look back on your “life’ as a very long series of “shoulda coulda woulda”s.
On a lighter note, is your mother-in-law as big on Whole Foods as you are? Are the three of you going to be culinarily compatible?
Sorry for your loss David. I too have had friends who’ve suddenly passed away and it reminded me to live life to the fullest.
Taras
It really does remind you to wake up. Its a shame how it takes tragedy to do that.
Tony
Not married so she is just a girlfriends mom:) And she is a southern woman so whole foods is not yet in Arkansas:)
Jules
Very funny that is a classic
Is there any way I can get these on my Ipod? Like an mp3 or something..?
I just got this from my buddy anthony and i wanted to pass his thoughts along.
How to Start World Peace
There’s one thing that you can do RIGHT NOW to start world peace. One thing that your brother, your sister, your parents, your coworkers, your friends, your politicians, your president can do to achieve the unachieved. ONE SIMPLE thing, that EVERY SINGLE PERSON, starting WITH YOU, can do on this planet if they want World Peace.
This one simple thing that you can do is this: Learn a New Language.
Back when I was a senior at Magnolia High School in Anaheim, CA, I took a college sociology class offered by Cal Poly Pomona. The first day of class, my professor told an amazing story that today still plays on in my memory. He said that one night while ordering take out at a Chinese restaurant, he made an employee’s jaw drop by doing this. He said Xie Xie, which means Thank You in Chinese, to the waiter when he got his take out. My professor said that this Chinese waiter, was stunned, shocked, and surprised that here in this moment, a black man was attempting to speak his language. My professor noticed that INSTANTANEOUSLY, the waiter’s attitude towards him changed, FOR THE BETTER. The waiter was more friendly, open, and communicative towards him.
Folks, this story is revealing of a universal law. The law of loving your neighbor. It’s nearly impossible for a person to not feel important, and not feel appreciated, when YOU, a stranger, a non native speaker IS AT LEAST ATTEMPTING to speak their language. I’m a Chinese-American, and I know I would be open and friendly to an individual if they attempted to speak Chinese, regardless if they were, French, Russian, Scandinavian, Dutch, Japanese, Brazilian, Arabic, and so on. And if this person of different descent was able to speak my native tongue fluently, I would definitely be cultivating a stronger bond and feelings of togetherness with them. I can confidently announce too that there wouldn’t be any thoughts of violence, war, or torture towards this individual speaking with me.
GREAT COMMUNICATION is more than just being able to comprehend the other person’s words. It’s about feeling the other person’s tone of voice, their choice of words, and their overall delivery. It’s basically trying gauge their individuality. Trying to feel a genuine connection with another person’s soul, their BEING. And this can’t be accomplished without first being able to understand the other person’s language. And that’s where great communication originates, with you, attempting to learn a new language. It can even be the one you speak fluently right now. Go out there and become experts in language, communication, and delivery! And when you’re done Learn More!
I know there are many words in Chinese that have no English counter part. There are words in the English language that probably don’t have a Spanish Counter part. There’s probably German words too that don’t have a Swahili counterpart. See this big picture here? Communication is interpersonal, we Humans’ are emotional and thinking creatures by nature. We need to personally be able to communicate with one another directly, not through a translator. Things do get lost in translation. And when there’s no strong communication, literally all war breaks out. The battlefields can be between two people in a romantic relationship, two family members in the home, two coworkers at the workplace, or two countries, religions, etc pitting against each other.
In summary, we can all agree that MISCOMMUNICATION is an underlying cause of most conflicts in our World. We are all unique. We are all different. We all need to learn each other’s language. Can you imagine how the muslim world would see The U.S if President Obama was attempting and able to communicate confidently in their native tongues? I can, it would be the beginning to an end of many conflicts, misunderstandings, and wars.
I’m wondering, is there bootcamps for women?
I’m having a good day. My birthday also!
David – Most guys would really dread a girlfriends mother coming to stay with them. I’ve been that way in the past. Now when I get to a challenge like this.. and it will be a challenge… I look at it as an opportunity to prove my ability to deal with adverse conditions in a positive manner. A chance for me to prove to myself what I know in my head I can do.
I remember the first time I met my ex girlfriends family (mother, father, and 5 sisters), I felt like I was getting the 3rd degree. They were poking, prodding, quizzing, and judging me. The first thing I did was have fun with her sisters kids, about 10 minutes into it I was playing with one of their daughters who ran over to me and said “I love you Adam!”. It was all downhill from there. I had fun with it and won approval of all but 1 of the sisters, but she was known to be the really harsh one and came to approve of me in the long run. Have fun these next 2 weeks, I’m sure we’ll hear some stories in the blog as they happen and we’ll enjoy them. Thanks for sharing your life and your views with us.
Adam
Thanks for sharing your stories!!
I am sure you are going to hear some funny stories over the next 2 weeks….14 days….336 hours…..
Kismet
We have bootcamps for women every month. we are having one this weekend in LA!
happy birthday!!!
David
Sorry for you loss. It’s hard when people are taken from us so early in life.
I know first hand that life is so precious and to live each day as if it were your last.
My younger brother was involved in an accident and paralyzed from the waist down when he was 19 yrs old…..BUT he didnt waste any time in life…..he got out & STARTED living his life. He started his own kyaking business, helping others on the river (that werent in wheelchairs LOL) …..he snow skiied…he did 500 miles bike races(specal built) in Alaska, on wheel chair basketball teams, won several arm wrestling championships…he was so involved in his community helping others with disabilities…(which he didnt think he had)….. he was a true friend to all he met and a great inspiration to all around him!
He was killed in a car accident june 22,2008…..at the young age of 40yr.(20 yrs later)
He didnt regret one day of life…he lived it.
DONT WASTE TIME! Live, laugh & love and experience all you can.
Anthony (justadjustit)
A lot truth to it but even that would cause issuses as which language should the president choose, one way or another it would be twisted in the wrong way. What I had always wished for was to be able to agree on one like Esperanto as the second language for as many countries in the world. This way we could be able to communicate without borders.
I have knowledge of several languages and it’s so amazing to travel to another contry and speak the native language, even more when you begin to dream in it.
Equally is for everyone to try to live in another country, when you do that you really get to see have similar we fundementally all are.
Kismet happy birthday to you 19 right hope you have a great day
David, It is sad that what you say is true. All human beings regardless of our vast diferences all want the same thing. a happy, peaceful life. But because we do not “communicate” with each other, we mistrust each other. And wars begin. Love thy neighbor as you love yourself, that is all that we need to remember, for true peace to prosper.
Whe the wife and I moved from New York to North Carolina, we stayed in her mothers house until we got our own place to live. All I can say is good luck. Practice your zen or something!!! Two women fighting over what was best for me, just about drove me insane. Paul Loughner
Roxy
Wow thanks for sharing that it was an inspiration!!
Paul
Two women fighting over a man is a mans dream unless it is the wife and mother in law:)
Roxyd
Wow that’s was beautiful…it’s amazing when our lives have been touched so closely by people who truly lived everyday to it’s fullest and who did’t let anything stop them.
Hey david,
really great stuff, I’m just gonna get straight to the point, would you mind creating a post on creating and maintaining positivity? It’s just one of the things that are hard to maintain under stress/pressure for whatever reasons for me, and as I look around my student hall, for most students, as we are just a few days away from exams, and the whole atmosphere is just like a domino effect on everyone else.
Cheers
Jakub
So I don’t want to keep waiting or wasting my time.
Well there’s this cute guy in my class and we sit next to eachother the whole semester without talking, except for a few times where I ask him questions related to assignments and his major. Now that schools ending with only one more day to see him which is exam day, I’m wondering if I should add him on facebook. The thing is, I only know his first name, and his last name is supposedly unknown to me, but in our class syllabus, our full names were listed for something each of us have to do. This means that I can easily add him on facebook, but what if he thinks its stalking or creepy? Is IT creepy?
reminds me of some of the new thoughts out there about being in the moment, doing what’s in front of you to do, and don’t wait. All you have is right now, so just go do it.
My mother and I have a close relationship…but last year my dad and I could not see eye to eye then one day I seen he was down and I said we are hutchens and we are alike in some ways and others we are not. There are going to be times that we will have disagreements now that was the other day now lets live for the future now get over it. I found out it was something my youngest daughter did. Now having both of my daughters here is going to be a chore for one is testy and the other is mouthy but I am going to try to patient with both of them and try to help my oldest daughter through the problems she is having. Today my dad and I are getting along just fine now I found that my dad has a sense of humor but did you know my parents are the only ones can whip my ass but anyone else better take a number and stand in line. But I learned one thing in life no matter who they are say I love you…when you finish a phone call for you may never know what may come up.
My mom told me a story long time ago that involved her and this woman and how bad she felt when she did especially when she could not apologize for what was said. She told me this watch what you say to someone for when they pass you can not say sorry I done that. For I know how this is for I lost one of my boyfriends in a horrible automobile accident and before his death we had words and that has bothered for I could not say I am sorry for he died. Then this one woman I said something bad about her and when I found out that she died I immediately asked Lord Jesus for forgiveness for what I said.
the woman died of a terminal illness and it my mother felt bad…
David,
Yeah, sorry I forgot for a moment that you’re not married. Should’ve known better, but you’ve been with this girl for several years now and her mom is coming to visit for 2 weeks? She probably will feel like a mother in law soon.
And those YouTube vids you linked to made me forget too.
Anyway, I hope everything goes well. She may become your mother in law someday.
Tony
Actually its been 8 months with her:)
And you never know what will happen in the future…..as long as you stay present you will create magic.
Great podcast, David. Really hits home. A few week back, I started reading Neil Strauss’s new book EMERGENCY – about how to survive the apocolypse, basically – I read one chapter and put it down because it scared the shit out of me. But it also made me realize all my day to day concerns were pretty insignificant, and that this could all be gone in an instant – so live life to the fullest!!! I’m gonna read it shortly.
Happy Birthday Kismet!
Haha thanks DTO.
No one replied to my facebook question. Ahhh I don’t know what to do about it…
I will say hi how is your day? and just let the conversation flow…Do NOT talk about class assignment again! You are right there and then you add him on facebook…I find that not creepy but…gutless.
Then again, I do not have a facebook page, I am busy enough already, who needs to connect with some ex’s again? lol
DTO:
I was going to mention to him how funny it is that we sit next to eachother but never talk! But then didn’t get the chance to since he volunteered to run some errand for the professor. I have one more day but its exams and I can’t really do anything with that. Except for asking something like, mind if I add you on facebook? But who knows, people leave after finishing their exams…
kismet…read your question after yourself, doesn’t it seem ilke a super creepy frame already? Just get your “balls” together and talk to him, be playful, lots of kino, and hit hard.
Good luck
kismet–this kinda goes back to what David is talking about and taking those chances..live life! Talk to him! I wouldn’t focus too much about a strategy or what you are going to say or “waiting for that right moment”. Just say hi and make it happen.
As for the Facebook, people connect this way all of the time. Do you have a mutual friend then you can connect that way? Anyway, good luck! And…come join us for a bootcamp sometime! We are also launching a 1-day intensive workshop for women coming soon so watch for that too.
David—I love it…your embracing CHANGE!!!!!!:)
Yea I just needed confirmation. And adding him was a last resort, but I haven’t added him yet. Can’t really do too much during exam lol. I’ll see.
Thanks Coach Kimberly! No, I don’t have a mutual friend with him unfortunately.
You are right on. I lost my husband, at 42, and then my dad recently. We waited for this and that to be happy. Then he died and our little girl is here with me.
I agree David — to feel the fear and face it head on. To embrace change. Do not wait. Thank you.
David,
My bad, I’m losing track of the girlfriends and exes you’ve had in your life over the years. I’ve listened to lots of MP3s and videos & podcasts but still need to work on developing my listening skills.
Anyway, I’ve been doing those exercises of going out & talking to a lot of people around town like at the supermarket, stores, the mall, my classes, what little time is left till the semester ends, etc. So I’ll say,
“Hi” or “Hi, how are you doing?” or “Hi. How are you today?” with a smile and while working on my posture & walk. Sometimes I get blown off, but sometimes they, particularly women will respond by smiling and saying “Hi” back or they’ll say “Hi. Fine thanks. How are you?” with a smile.
I’ve had some interesting & potentially fruitful encounters lately like at the grocery store, bookstore, and the mall today. I went into this one place in the mall food court area and there was this cute blonde working the counter. So I said “Hi. How are doing today?” with a smile and then she perked up a bit and said she was doing great, I ordered my sandwich while making light small talk about their menu and then went to sit down at a nearby table. While eating, I overheard a guy she obviously knew standing around talking to her about school. So as I went to leave, I said I overheard her talking about her classes. So then we got into a lengthy convo about her classes, her ambitions, what she likes, her family, etc. And she was smiling and seemed to be enjoying the conversation. My only regret was in not getting her #, but she did mention she was still going to be around this Summer and working there. So I can always go back.
I could tell a few stories about approaches at the local supermarket, but I need to get back to studying now. Been very busy lately & haven’t had much time to post messages, read many blogs or anything here as I was doing. But as you can see here, I have been working on my personal life in a number of ways when time permits. Updating my clothes, and doing these approach & talking exercises when I find any free time. After all, what’s the point in listening & reading more & more blogs & podcasts if I don’t go out & put into practice what you & your coaches have taught us so far? We gotta go out & use this stuff & put it into practice or it’ll never do us any good.
I connected with 2 people behind the counter today, i was in the moment and was listening to the other person, wow, it was a great feeling afterwards like a warm up sorta thing,
Tony 888- ” We gotta go out & use this stuff & put it into practice or it’ll never do us any good ”
that is so true.
I’m listening to Davids Date to win mp3′s , very effective techniques that do actually work.
I got a good laugh out of the Flinstones video You would think that as times have changed, so would the mother-in-law step-son relationship haha
I always feel that original thinkers (wether it be Plato/Freud/Machivelli) can make a change. Some can change a political system, some can change they way in which we think about the human itself. But some motivational speakers can make something out of nothing, they have that key ability to know what to say and when to say it. I feel that you, David, hold the burdon of a motivational thinker/speaker in such high regard that you wont let anybody down. I feel thats the last thing you would do.
Thats why I think believe people are drawn naturally to you.
Peace mate!
I’m sorry for the loss of your friend David. Whenever you lose someone that you’ve shared a friendship with it provokes your mind to question the universe and the way which many of us go about our daily lives.
Great podcast David, I feel more motivated now after listening to it and I am sure that everyone else on this blog feels the same way. Take it easy man.
David,
First and foremost, I’m sorry for the loss of your friend. Secondly…this was an awesome podcast! Life IS too short. Back in 04′ I lost my mother to breast cancer. Now, we were not close as I was growing up and she was completing a bucket list before she passed and apologized to me for how I was treated in my younger years. In the last year of her life I began to find out all about my mom and took care of her for the last two weeks of her life. It was the toughest thing I’ve ever done in my life, but it also opened my eyes to what I’ve really missed in life. At that point I realized that if I don’t grab life by the reins and run with it, I never will. Today, I turn 45 and have started living the life I always wanted. I’m in a scuba diving class to become certified, traveling all over the world, and meeting new people every day. David, this a great podcast for individuals to understand that days pass by too fast not the enjoy it and if you haven’t started….today is the day. Enjoy the visit with your girlfriend’s mother.
“There’s one thing that you can do RIGHT NOW to start world peace.” The simplest way to affect positive change is to be aware of other people. The human face expresses emotions the same way, through all languages. If you know that, and are aware of it, it makes interactions with people much easier no matter what language they speak. The way you become aware, is to interact all the time.
World peace starts the second you believe in it.
Thanks David for this blogcast. “How many of you waste tons of time thinking about vacations you never take, or worse planning vacations to Europe you’ll take twenty years from now when you retire? “. Ha, this one especially hits home (refer to my post in Rewarding Yourself). I’m getting over the fear of travelling alone thanks to this blog and people around me who are telling me to just go for it. Right now I actually have OTHER travel that need to be confirmed before I can make arrangements for my solo trip to Europe. But I’m seriously looking into it.
David, the part on languages and miscommunication from your friend Anthony is also hitting home. Apart from the fact that I am a professional translator and deal with “lost in translation” every day, I’m currently trying to mediate some disagreements between two of my musician friends, and am witnessing some major communication problems. Some of the stuff posted here has helped me validate my views of this situation.
Kismet, you’ll certainly regret it if you don’t make some attempt to talk to that guy. And if you blow it/embarrass yourself, all that will happen is that the guy will disappear and you’ll never see him again! It goes back to that old saying: the only things we regret in life are the things we didn’t do, not the things we did. Ask him if he studied hard for the exam or how many more exams he has to take or anything else you can think of. After that, you can say something like “you seem like a nice guy and it’s too bad we didn’t get a chance to talk more in class. Can we stay in touch on facebook?” Good luck with it.
Tony888, I’ve been trying to approach people this way too and the more I do it, the more I realize it really is easy to meet people. Of course you always run into some people who are uninterested, but there are plenty of people who will open up after a simple ice-breaker like “Hi how are you?” or “Wow it’s really crowded in here”.
Kismet, why don’t you just catch him before or after class if you can’t talk to him during class?
Someone once said, “Don’t Wait To Be Happy” and its a very profound statement.
Wow this one shocked me. You decide to get a drink of water or just enjoying life a little to much and getting into your favorite jam thats on and suddenly your afraid of change….I did not know that about myself
Try this one: this morning I get a call from my mom and she says your best male friend died this morning at 2am of health complications. Did you know that he played his last game of cards with my parents last night. Me and this guy grew up together as children and played together we had been through good times as well as the bad. But life must go on.
I’m sorry for your loss too, Sandra. My sympathies to you and his family.
Thank you Tony
Both of our parents have been friends since the sixties and it is funny how our families followed each other to different counties. He left a wife and his children behind. His sister had heard him fall and went to check on him and she found him passed out and she is a nurse and she tried to revive him but he did not make it. So my prayers do go out to him and his family.
Good blog du jour. Here’s one of my favorite quotes:
“When words fail, wars begin. When wars end, we settle our disputes with words.”
On a more personal level, my observation is that when words fail us, we miss countless opportunities. When we finally work up the courage to speak first, it allows things to move forward and the universe opens up, the journey begins anew…destination unknown but who know? It could be the trip of a lifetime!
When I first read the post from Anthony via David I had my own thoughts about world peace and decided to write something about how I felt.
But I think I almsot missed the message of his letter. When I was 17, I felt alienated from the place I was going to school and the friends I had, etc., etc. I decided to pursue a foreign exchange program and I wound up living in Japan for my senior year and had to take an extra year of high school to make up for it (don’t worry, I actually had a lot of fun during that extra year). Without dragging up more of my past (which always gets a response from Dan) I thought going to Japan and forcing myself into a new culture would help me fix my negative views of my own. I also thought it would be an opportunity to get laid and start fresh.
So I went over there with 2 other kids from other schools and like Anthony said in his post above, it is an incredibly valuable experience for learning how to approach and lose your fear of apporaching people. People love to help others try and learn and I felt like a star over there because everyone in Japan wants to practice their English on you. I would stand at a train station and I would have business men come over and start casual conversations with me in English just to practice. I wanted to practice my Japanese and it always worked out nicely.
The school was a lot of fun and reflecting back, I had an incredible experience. I had plenty of girlfriends but I didn’t do anything more that hold hands and kiss and stuff. But then I went right back to America and instead of taking the lessons that I was being shown in Japan, I regressed right into the person I was when I left.
I agree with Anthony, if you are stuck and want to experience a dramatic way to feel better about approaching and talking to people, learning a new language is a great way to feel the strength of a connection as it happens.
I think the language thing as creating world peace is cool.
But all it really takes for world peace is UNDERSTANDING eachother. And not dehumanizing a person. The 4-D’s that leads to destruction and mass murder are: dissociating, devalue,dehumanize, destroy. I forgot the order and the correct word, but its really that simple.
Dreaming on about world peace is nice but too unrealistic and not practical…We can all sing Kumbaya but, in real life, the strong will screw the weak, it happens every day unfortunately…
But let me turn to you Mike. I also was a foreign exchange student (I am not saying the year!) and the experience changed my life! I was an unhappy kid with issues growing up in my home country…I had to get away and coming in a foreign land I started anew (plus getting laid also helped!). Lesson: American girls fuck much easier than Japanese girls:-)
In addition, I find, IN GENERAL, Japanese women to be much colder than other Asians…winning one over is like trying to make bin laden a Christian….not worth it…again, IMHO:-)
So, Mike, I guess, you should have stayed there:-)
DTO:
whoa…
Well thats because Asians are taught to be more polite and have more restrictions thus not being easy and/or too open.
I tried to listen to this. David is talking about being positive, but his tone is negative and his language is vulgar. I can’t finish it.
Sidney
Really….
My language is vulgar.
How old are you?
And my tone negative……very strange you feel this way.
You are the only one who has said this so i am really curious what you found negative and vulgar?
David – please don’t ever change. Sounds like someone doesn’t understand role-playing and gives more power to vocabulary usage than to the message itself by picking it apart. Frankly, that’s petty and small-minded…indicative of living a narrow and insular world. We can’t all be saccharin in our approach to things and perhaps this site is just not for those folks who require a softer delivery approach or maybe a motherly-type woman to coach them. I prefer the blunt approach from an honest viewpoint which I find here.
Sorry for your loss David, and the other people who spoke of loss. It sounds like you are transforming it into something meaningful.
@ Marina
That’s the same quote (but not said exactly) my friend said to me when I was in the hospital last year because of my first seizure. It has always been a great quote that I always cherish. Thanks for reminding me
Great podcast, you are so right about it. I wait to many times for the right moment, or dont have time or money to do that thing. I come up wich excuses, its one way to delay it or dont take action. Better to take action and have a different result than dont take action and be angry about it. What do you have to lose?
so how would you approach someone at a supermarket, or at a counter? a starbucks even