Are You A Talker?
July 9, 2009 
32 Comments
Did you see Yahoo’s homepage today? This was one of their lead stories: “The World’s Worst Tourists.” This is their lead story for today?
Well, apparently (and according to hotel owners from around the world) loud obnoxious Americans are not the world’s worst tourists. It’s the French.
So who do you think are the best? It’s the Japanese. It figures, because nobody understands their language so no one knows if they’re complaining. it’s easy to tell when the French are complaining. They’ll just turn their nose up and walk away. The Japanese are quiet all the time.
Also topping Yahoo’s homepage news stories is this headline: “Boy Saves Mom After Indoor Lightening Strike.” There’s even a video about it. Then there’s the headline “Inside Jackson Kids’ Lives At Neverland” for a story which reveals that Michael Jackson actually cleaned up his own spills. Wow! It sounds like Yahoo should actually be called yahoonationalinquirer.com.
Finally, Yahoo’s fourth big story of the day was the results of a poll. I love polls. Exactly whom do they ask to participate in all these polls? People who come out of supermarkets in the middle of the day who have nothing else to do? No one has ever asked me to participate in a poll, and if they did I would walk away. I always say that people who participate in polls have too much time on their hands.
This story was about poll results which indicated that Sarah “Screw You Alaska” Palen is “still a viable presidential candidate.” It’s 2009. Do we really need to be talking about who will run for President in 2012? Shouldn’t politicians learn to act in the present like I teach all of you guys to do?
Anyway, let’s talk about the present today…
There are a lot of good talkers out there. So many people are wonderful talkers. People are just great with talking.
“I want to please you Honey.”
“I want to take care of you Honey.”
“I want to do this for you Honey.”
The question is: Do you really do what you say you’re going to do? Everyone can say all the right things, but how many people actually deliver?
In life, are you a talker or are you a doer? I really believe all of us should be doers.Â
If you have found someone you love, then think back for a second about how hard it was to find that person. How many dates did you go on before you found the person you love? How many years, and how many bad relationships, did you go through before you found the person you love?
Pretty grim isn’t it? Well, then, you’ve got to start coming through with the things you promise that person, because otherwise you are going right back to that place all over again . . . and you don’t want to go back there.
I believe a relationship is a sacred place. When your lover needs something, what do you do? How open are you to your lover’s desires?
If your lover needs their head scratched one night, will you scratch their head for two seconds and then stop? That is the equivalent of saying “f*^k you” to them. That is like saying, “Whoops, I just touched your head but I didn’t mean to do it.”
When your lover asks for a massage, will you really give them a great massage for an hour and enjoy it because they enjoy it, or will you massage them for two minutes and that’s it? If your lover looks at you and says they want to take you to the bedroom for some great sex, do you say “Ok, after we watch Everybody Loves Raymond” or “Well, just wait because I haven’t seen this episode of Two And A Half Men?”
How open are you to your lover’s needs and desires? All of us need to be more open to our lover’s needs and desires.
As far as I’m concerned, the thing that turns me on the most is when my lover expresses her desires to me. It’s when she expresses her needs, because then I know how to make her feel good.
I think all of us need to understand that sometimes you have to ask for what you want. A lot of us feel very funny about asking, and feel we are putting a burden on the other person by asking.
We hint a little bit, saying things like “I like my head rubbed,” and then we don’t ask again. We will just say things like this in passing but won’t ask outright. All of us are so preoccupied that we can’t remember everything our lover says.
So if you say “I need my head rubbed,” they will hear it and acknowledge it. When you want your head rubbed, however, why not just look at them and say, “Rub my head.”
If someone asks you for something like this, then don’t ever put a silly time limit on it. That time limit is what makes people not want to ask you for things ever again. So the next time your lover wants their head rubbed, don’t stop until they thank you and say they’ve had enough.
Be generous. Don’t just be the talker. Be generous with your time and your affection. It will come back to you ten-fold.
I really enjoyed reading today’s blog David, it really shows the depth of your teaching!
you right few people really deliver, i am guilty of that sweet talk in the past, i am guessing we all are at some point in her lives, however like you said its the power of action the makes all the difference!
Harper- i haven’t seen you on the blog in the past, so just wanted to welcome you in if anyone haven’t yet!!!
Like David mentioned take action b/c it speaks louder than words, so many people say that they want to love, but they still haven’t taken the action to show that they really love him or her.
Thank you Coach Jacob!
I am now working mostly on taking actions since it makes the biggest difference.
Harper- welcome to the blog as well:)
This blog is deep as someone else mentioned earlier, yes guys totally agree what David had to share, you will have to show us through your action not just your sweet talk.
Although there are women who fall for the sweet talk:) however i am not one of them, since i am kind of picky about the men i deate:)
Thanks Julia!
hey how i come i never get a welcome here LOL
Rick- here is my open arms welcome for you:)
well thank you Julia and a question for you…………how come you don’t fall for the sweet talk anymore?
i have a question for you as well Julia, hope you don’t mind. Why are you so picky about men?
wow boy i am in for a interview today:)
Rick- lets just say its from experience, in the past i met lot of men who promised me a lot of things so they can enter me, if you know what i mean:)
i am glad that lesson is learned, so i don’t fall for it anymore.
Howe- i don’t mind, like i said earlier b/c of my past experiences and considering my values i want a man who is intelligent, witty, and successful in life.
So that is why i am picky. This is why i really like what David teaches here!!!
what you mean by entering you Julia?
Thanks for the quick replay Julia, i know what you mean and its sad.
howe you know exactly what she means LOL
The Japanese are the nicest maybe b/c of their thinking they are improving their economy. Who knows they might be the happiest people in the planet.
Hey Steve- its funny though you can’t tell if they are happy nor not, b/c they are quiet most of the times. Thats what i am going to do from now on wherever i go, just stay quiet, its a power.
howe your funny
Since David mentioned about people i am curious who are happiest people in the planet? anyone?
I’m trying to get the courage to ask for exactly what I want from my lover. Last night I wanted sex…but I got my neck tickled. The neck tickle was nice, but…well I was disappointed.
Crystal he must be a lucky guy, just ask why not ask him? are you afraid of rejection?
i try to say just what i think and feel to people. it’s a little harder with someone
i connect with since i tend to just say it and not wait for the right time & place.
for example, i told the lady i’ve been dating, “I’d like to spend more time with just you”.
that’s exactly what i meant, but was taken as meaning i wanted more than she was
ready for. she’s a bit sensitive, and uses the past to “predict” the future and understand
the present. i’m guilty of that myself sometimes. patience is not one of my best
qualities, so now i get to think over just how to say what i want. y’all let me know
a good way to do this & i’ll listen.
and what if i ask her, and she says “no”?
i tend to distrust and slowly detach myself to people who say one thing and don’t do it. It makes you distrust them and you don’t feel like connecting real deep with them. It’s not like a flat out lie, but it show a lot of empty talk and I really don’t like it at all. It’s through your actions not your words you really show your true self.
I’m a talker but a back it up with being a doer.
marina,
in a sitiuation i was in not long ago. things were said, but didn’t happen. even little
stuff. now i’m seeing someone who does what they say. it’s like night & day. don’t
always agree, but there’s true communication. the first person was indirect &
evasive. this one’s forward, and even if we don’t agree, things are friendly, and
can be discussed with no problems. she’s shy & a bit scared of “relationships”,
but we do have one, and i’m gonna gently remind her of what we have.
drd,
sounds like you have the right building blocks to a great relationship, she just needs some time to see that you are what you say you are, through your actions.
Hey Jimmi,
Actually, I’m not afraid of him rejecting me. We sort of have an agreement. It’s just an unfamiliar situation and I’m just not that brazen — yet. For some reason I wanted him to initiate things a few nights ago. However, last night I went over to his house, crawled into his bed, undressed him and took what I wanted. He gave it up gladly.
I am hoping he will let me do the same tomorrow night.
thanks, marina.
i hope you’re right. i’ve known this lady for 30 years, we haven’t been in close touch
for years, but she’s really open about herself, a divorce, and relationships since then.
she’s a great companion, which means a lot to me. we enjoy a lot of the same stuff,
but she’s somewhat shy to get involved with anyone she knew while she was married.
i know most all the same folks, and it doesn’t matter to me. we’ve been having fun, and
have been able to talk about these things a little. i’m pretty fond of her, and doing what
i say is no problem at all.
The wants and desires of one…When my lover wants me to do something I am open and will give them my attention. Put yourself in their shoes how would you like it when you want something done and they look at you and put you off. Not fair is it.
David, great post and blog- i enjoyed reading it