you must be the guy then who comes back as the Caveman in the Geico Commercials:-)

I’m sorry to hear about the loss of your parents, and both in the last seven years, that is rough. Add to that feeling like you don’t know where you’re going with life, and it totally makes sense that you are feeling needy, scared, frightened, vulnerable and alone. And it would also make sense to me, that in that state you might not attract the kind of woman that would be a good match for you.

It sounds like the wilderness could be good for you, unless you go there to escape the responsibility you have to yourself of healing yourself, and being able to approach women with a sense of your own power. What have you done for yourself lately that has helped you feel like you have more direction in your life? What have you done for yourself lately that lets you know that you can trust yourself to take care of you when you are feeling needy, scared, etc?

Often when people feel needy, it is a sign that you are putting out more energy than they are getting back, and it may be time to re-route some of that giving energy to yourself. It doesn’t necessarily make you selfish to focus on your own needs. It helps you come from a place of self-fullness when you meet your own needs. So that you can come from a place of inner strength when you are being kind to others. Not because you need their validation in exchange for your kindness, or in your case, ‘niceness’.

Dave it also sounds like you are doing a lot of running away– into the wilderness, into another country . . .

I have lost both my parents and in the last 7 years and have very little family..I also feel time and not knowing where I am heading with my life bearing down on me…Feeling needy, scared, frightened, vulnerable, alone ? You bet I am and with good reason ! It’s why I tear off into the wilderness as much as I can !

If that makes sense

There’s nothing wrong with doing nice things for women as long as you do it from a position of power. You do it because you want to, WITHOUT expectations of returned favor.

The “nice guy” always do things for the woman in hopes that she likes him back. As Patrick described, that’s a weak man.

Personally, I haven’t been called a nice guy in a long time. I’ve noticed that women call a “nice guy” their guy friend orbitters. They feel some form of pity to him when they say that.

Personally, I would call a nice but attractive/powerful man a kind man. He’s kind to the woman that he likes. Most women who find me attractive and “nice” just calls me “sweet”. They never associate the term “nice” with me. Maybe that says something about how women use the term “nice”.

I thought that was great that there are sex education classes around. I thought there would’ve only been classes around for “couples”.

Thanks Patrick for the definition of a weak guy. So on the money. Whenever I’ve met these types of guys, I have put them in the friends zone straight away too. It’s not appealing if you know you can walk all over them and they’ll still be hanging around. I guess it’s the same in the opposite situation with men and weak women.