What I’m saying is don’t overcomplicate things by over-thinking.

If you stop the monkey chatter and clear your mind of clutter and self-doubt, you can start listening attentively to what your instinct and what your body tells you.

You can start “being” attractive instead of “trying” to be attractive.

A lot of times, your gut knows what to do. Being confident is listening to your gut and acting on it IMMEDIATELY. There’s no room for doubt… and surprisingly, when you live like that, you end up doing the very things you love. You end up doing the very things you were meant to be and people become more attracted to you because of that.

Quit thinking about how you should be and just be…make sense? If you are truly looking for anything more than a one-night-stand or pbysical relationship then you have to be and love yourself. If you’re modifying your behavior to attract someone you aren’t being true to yourself.

Good luck man…

~J`

Jesse, your self-work is great! Don’t stop but at the same time, don’t overcomplicate things.

Being yourself means shedding all the layers of insecurities that you do not need so you can shine and attract anyone around you.

Good luck!

You’re still thinking technique. Just be yourself.

– Patrick

lol… but I think you make sense. Especially looking at these blog and videos as of late. Perhaps I need to channel the attitude I have toward women I am not interested in (since they seem to pursue me). Most importantly, I need to not worry or care as much. By doing that I feel I can be myself completely and there will be so sense of fakeness or whatever vibe poeple get if I am trying to hard.

~J~

Could your desire for David be any more obvious???

Harvey D

Reading your story brought tears to my eyes. Seriously, I had tears rolling down my cheeks I was laughing so hard.

While I agree with some of the advice and opinions offered to you today, I can’t say that any of the people that responded to your post are going to be able to take responsibility for sending you “back out into the wild” to make a successful “kill”. If you like my metaphor for the dating scene or social interaction then chances are your intentions with that particular person, from whom you already scored the number, were transparent.

That’s why she bailed on your date and that’s why you will probably not be able to set a second date with her. If you are able to, more power to you and don’t blow it by talking more than she does or letting her in on every thought that’s dribbling out of your head. If she seems distracted when you are talking to her, it’s because you’re talking TO her and not WITH her. Women want to be heard and agreed with, so listen up…agree.
*See my comments about what to do if you don’t get the 2nd date at the end of this post*

Introduce humor that is relevant to the discussion and when appropriate (asking if the turkey is good here followed by a knock-knock joke or a random outburst to a complete stranger is going to make you seem unstable and will likely ruin any chance you may’ve had with her). As a matter of fact, Jessie, maybe you should just leave the witty comebacks and jokes alone until after the third date. Relax and stop trying to entertain a woman. There are plenty of clowns and fakes roaming the streets, don’t give her a reason to think that you’re one of them.

Last but not least, don’t force anything. If you come off too desperate, horny or clingy you can again kiss your chances buh-bye. It is true, women like to be pursued, but they love to pursue. If the woman of your desire doesn’t show the slightest hint of desire towards you, let it go. Don’t waste your time trying to please or win over someone that you couldn’t please or win over to begin with.

Which leads me to what to do if you don’t get the 2nd date; If you don’t get the 2nd date, do us all a favor by not giving her the satisfaction, the boosted ego and a subject for countless jokes with her friends by continuing to pursue her. Drop her and move on to the next. You never know, the fact that you dropped her so quickly may intrigue her.

You see, there is no single method of attracting or meeting women because yes, there are a lot of commonly-known desires of women, but until you are able to identify and exploit that additional set of desires that is unique to each woman, I would advise leaving the hunting to the hunters and be happy with the scraps that you are blessed with.

-Harvey D

Here’s the thing. Being a powerful man isn’t a technique. Social proof and body language aren’t tricks. Your approaches and follow-ups aren’t working because you’re focusing on the wrong things and it will always show through, despite your best efforts.

The way to approach confidently is simply to approach. As yourself. You walk over to a girl and start talking to her. No tricks, no gimmicks.

If you find afterward that you were doubting yourself, that you got a funny reaction, that something didn’t go right, then ask yourself why. What did you doubt about yourself? Sit down and deal with it honestly. Get over that inhibition and try again.

Did you get a funny reaction? Again, why? Were you relevant to this situation? Approaching isn’t about picking the right technique, it’s about being in the moment.

When you approach based on techniques, it’s almost impossible to let your honest and real personality show through. The woman can sense you’re being fake and, even though she might respond positively for a while, her attitude won’t last because you’re not building a real, authentic connnection.

Just being you was always good enough. Don’t listen to the guys who tell you otherwise.

– Patrick